This is a terrible thing for him to do to his children. Big hugs to you, I’m so sorry 
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@SoberWalker Sorry to hear about your dad. Your story is very similar to mine, except my dad stopped talking to all of his family right after I got married and for no real reason at all. I stopped trying to reach out after my youngest was born and decided to just go through the stages of loss and accept the fact we will never be again. His mother passed away recently and I will be attending her funeral tomorrow. Every time his side of the family sees me they question me over a little million things as if this hasn’t been going on for the last 12 years. It’s going to be a long day tomorrow 
I agree with @Mtrav0040 in that it’s probably best to stop following your step-mom on FB. It will sting at first, but maybe let the healing begin. Hugs to you. 
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Welcome! Lots of folks here can relate to your situation. I’m the same way. No off switch. Just drink until I can’t remember. I’m 25 days sober and it gets much easier to abstain the further away from it you get. Check in here frequently and read as much as you can! It really helps. I also recommend therapy if you have access and can afford it. Many people here have found AA to be helpful. Many others aren’t a fan. Find what works for YOU and commit to it. We’re all heading the same direction but we don’t all have to take the same path! This is an incredibly supportive forum and I hope you stick around for a while!
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Wow! 61 days is fantastic!! I’ve no experience with narcotics but I just wanted to encourage you to keep going! I hear they are a beast to break free from. Hopefully someone else on here will offer you some advice!
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I can’t accept, that’s the point. He’s my dad, I am his daughter. I was a good daughter, he was a good dad. I can’t accept his choice to delete his old life. He cut everybody out, also his brother and my mom’s sisters. I can’t understand and that’s why I can’t let go. I know I have to.
I’m just lurking at my stepmoms FB 
It’s the only way to see if he’s still alive…
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Hi. Sober since 1st jan 2018.
Work is manic qt the minute but i havent had a drink. The temptation has at Times been there but i can move It along.
I hope folks have a good evening
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Hey, @aircircle I made it, Thank you for keeping tabs on me.
Couldn’t have done it without all of you. Thank you all, don’t be hard on yourself, Be well.
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That’s a lot😓 so sorry for the pain you are feeling. Family is so hard. Thank you so much for sharing and for staying sober. Sending a big hug from Australia!
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I used to call my dads place of employment every so often to see if he was still alive. Then I would check online to see if he still owned and paid taxes on his properties.
I used to be a good daughter too… good grades, never did drugs, never got into any trouble… (started drinking heavily in my 20’s)… so it always baffled my mind as to how he/ a parent could let that love unravel. I don’t take it personally anymore… something else is going on and I can’t keep reaching out to only be passively ignored and/or rejected 
Hope you can find peace on this subject soon. I will 
now 
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Thank you, I know I have to let go, maybe sorting those things out today is a good start. Maybe I need therapy for it I don’t know. It feels like a bucket full with emotions. Most of the times the bucket is closet and I’m fine. Then something happens and the bucket opens and makes me feel shit like today.
Do you see your father tomorrow at the funeral? That would be hard I guess. My condolences for the lost of your grandma. Big hug to you too! I wish you strenght for tomorrow.
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Thank you I appreciate all the support I can get to keep going… life has been super hard stopping especially how much I truly enjoyed my habit.
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I will not. If he were to come I would still go. And thank you 
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Just replied and see you write another answer thank you. Your story is definitely allmost the same as mine. It allways baffled my mind too, I do not understand and I do need to understand it to give it a place. But I know I never get the answer. He’s old now, allmost 80.
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U can do it just keep pushing forward get what ever u need off your chest it will make you feel soooo much better… AA and NA just wasn’t for me where I’m at … or I should say I haven’t found one that I truly enjoy and would like to keep going back… but I have heard so many great stories about people who take advantage of AA and NA… I wish you nothing but luck in your journey. We r all here if you need to vent
Have you looked in to SMART? It’s a good alternative.
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There’s also Women for Sobriety that might interest you. I’m not allowed to go but I’ve heard good things
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And now I shut up. I sound like a little toddler who can’t have it her way 
I’m just emotional and angry. I have to close that bucket again…
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Congrats on 1 year sober 
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I don’t think we will ever understand, but I do know now- giving up trying will never stop me from getting answers… if this makes sense. No amount of effort will change things… like his mind. He is done, I am done.
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