@jane.c
So glad to see you posting again!!! Congratulations on 291 days!!!
Thank you for the vote of confidence; I am determined not going back to Day 1 again.
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Day 3! Iām grateful for you guys!
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Haha I dunnoā¦ itās 32Ā°c (89.6F) with the humidex at just after 830am here this morning 
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Thank you 
payday is hard, but I bought this bad boys instead. Iām most delighted, thereās so many soft drinks we havenāt even tried yet, unfortunately this was all they had. Currently drinking the vanilla Coca-Cola, it tastes like vanilla floats.
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Thank you, payday, and payday weekend is always nice. The only bad thing is that the stores are always crowded in the afternoon.
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Thatās great are you sure youāre donāt have Swedens weather, we currently had the coldest May for 25 years.
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Day 140! How is everyone feeling today?
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Day 16 check in 
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Yes, I like the fancy things too (no shit Sherlock, I used to drink champagne almost every day 
) I might steal the idea with the luxurious water bottle, it sounds awesome. I think I love Cherry Cola more than Vanilla but the Cherry aināt sold here for what I now.
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Day 3: Well, I stopped being angry. Iām having a hard time at work cause I feel really tired. For those who donāt know me my doc is cocaine and I relapsed 3 days ago. Iām not relapsing anymore for now one, Iām done. My skin is totally messed up today I donāt even know why and to see that in the mirror idk it actually hurt? Well, this is my new begginning and I hope everything turns out fine.
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Day 99
Father inlaw took a turn for the worst and theyāre calling in a priest. Please keep him in your thoughts and prayers.
Going to stay positive and sober. Taking a drink will not solve any of these problems.
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Starting back at day 1. I think we can all guess where I went wrong. The klonopin was supposed to be something I was planning on taking when I āneededā it for PMS or severe cravings. But being the addict I am, that just so happened to be every night before bed at first and then earlier around 6pm and then anytime during the day when I āneeded itā and then I started counting how many I had left like Golum and the ringā¦ āmy preciousāā¦ and then bad things started happening like losing my phone off the ATV, most likely because the benzo in my system left me careless. Same with Nemo gettiing squished. I probably had slower reaction times. And I was lying to myself about my sobriety. I was not sober. I hated lying to myself and everyone. So now I have learned sobriety is EVERYTHING!! Not just alcohol and adderall for me. And the klonopin was messing with my personality, making me angry, and was a gateway to drinking the alcohol which was the last straw. Felt soooo shitty yesterday. And now day 1. Thanks to everyone who reached out. I genuinely thought I would never drink again.
Austins Aunt gave me all those pills because she had an MRI and her brain had shrunk so much from taking them. Wtf is wrong with me that I am like āIll take them!ā ā¦ 
Guess I am an addict.
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Did you go to a Recovery Dharma Online meeting? Or one that is only online due to Covid? I am just curious because I popped in to a couple āhomeā meetings and it was different.
Congrats on two weeks!
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Back on the horse, you can do it!
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What type is sweetener is it in place of sugar?
@802 thinking of you and praying for your father in law.
Sorry about the relapse @Clarity, at least you know were you went wrong.
Blessings and sobriety!
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@Clarity
I am glad you are back for another go. It is hard to go back to Day 1 (believe me I am on Day 10 after a relapse). Make sure you learn from this and remember those feelings.
Also, get to a meeting even if it is online. There are many formats to choose from (try them all).
It is impossible to quit on your own. You need many networks of supportive people to help you. Confide in your family and friends that you are trying to quit and need them to help you. Etc, etc, etc.
Good Luck, I am pulling for you!!!
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