269 Days. I’m so proud of my daughter today. She was watching a music marathon for NAACP on twitch and decided to donate her money. We were talking about the protests and she asked what she could do to help. She can’t join the protests and I couldn’t think of anything else at the time. She actually did the research on her own and found a way to give what she could.
Somehow made it to day 18! I cant “maintain focus” on anything these days. Lol.
Day 185! Pretty good day. Very low key, and so nice that it’s the weekend
day 589 and checking in, testing times my daughter has resurfaced after not seeing her for nearly 4 years and is speaking to all my family but me , so unsure of what to do …so want to speak to her but I am terrified of rejection ( all my previous attempts over the the last 4 years have led to nothing ) , my family are being really cagey about it which is making me feel even more excluded …if this was 2 years ago I would have blown up and challenged everyone why they have gone behind my back but now its like ive lost my voice and im constantly fighting my old self to be a better person…so frustrating this is another thing where i feel they don’t understand the work I’m putting to stay on the straight and narrow …#testingtimes
Day 587.
Happy to see you, sorry about the situation about your daughter. Unfortunately I don’t have any advice for that. Hope you can find the courage and strength to speak to her regardless of the outcome. You’ll feel better for it.
Blessings and sobriety!
Yeah you to my friend, yeah i just have to trust that this will sort itself out and not let it eat me up , I have asked my family to tell her I miss her and I love her , thats all I can do at the moment , blessings and sobriety to you to
Congratulations, you have reached it…365 days…unbelievable
Checking in on day 13.
- Coffee. Was planning a big ride today but I’m changing plans as I didn’t sleep too swell and neither is the weather great. Will stay a bit closer to home. Sometimes we have to adjust to circumstances just as long as we keep our main goals clear. For me that’s to remain sober and clean. One day at a time. Have a good Sunday all. Love from Amsterdam.
PS. The pic I got from my friend in Texas last week. Willow Loop, best place to see wildflowers in the Hill Country. Sharing it with @NateRC to celebrate his full year. Congrats Nate!
@sylentwar
That is a hard one, I can understand ur hurt and frustrated, but u can’t force people to have a relationship if they aren’t ready, as u already recognise. Could u get a letter to her? But the work u are doing to stay sober, has to be for yourself, u shouldn’t want or need acknowledgement from anyone else (I struggle with this too)
Day 636
Goodmorning (ore night)
I’ve given myself a new challenge yesterday, a walking one. I’ve joined the “Camino de Santiago” trail, a virtual one
Have to walk 772 kilometers (479,7 miles) to finish it! Is that a challenge or not!
If I finish it I will get a real medal for it. I have 1,5 year to make it but my goal is to finish earlier.
It helps me to set in life. It keeps me moving in mentaly and physical way.
Have a great day TS people! 🙋
Day 32
Feeling tired and unmotivated. Maybe it is the humidity. Have a ton of work that I am putting off. At least I am sober.
Did I miss your 1 year sober milestone Menno?
Seems like it Claudia. I’m not offended . The walking app looks very nice. Have a good day! @Misokatsu That’s exactly it. Days can still be hard. Life still sucks quite often. But at least we are sober. That in itself is motivation to me. Keep going friend. Have a good rest of your day, productive or not.
I know you’re not offended, I hope you had a great day and did something to celebrate it and reward yourself for this great milestone
I think I am more hurt at my family for not letting me know she had been in contact, especially at at my brother and sister who didn’t even tell me they were friends with her on Facebook,im allways making sure they are OK and im just shocked they couldnt just take 1 min to message me and tell whats going on and that my daughter is ok …i have stayed in the background as the last time I tried to contact her through youtube her mum blocked me ,and the letters I was sending were stopped …so this is why now I am so cautious , on one hand knowing she is talking to someone is really good , on the other hand I’m just disappointed no one is telling me anything If that makes sense …its not acknowledgement I want just a little bit of support from them on this, I think because I have struggled with depression and anxiety for such a long time and have allways used and drank to block it out ,its situations like this that really get me down and it all just gets to much …but recovery has taught me to be patient and take things one day at a time , I think i just wanted to come on here and share as I don’t really have anyone I can talk to about this and how it makes me feel
I LOVE this app , it’s helping me so much already. Thanks everyone x x