Submitted it yesterday @siand!! 
Omg I canāt tell you how good it feels to have that behind me. And itās a wonderful feeling to know, as hard, and a struggle as it was, that actually I DID it! I put myself through so much anxiety and worry, needlessly. Thank you so much for asking, means a lot to me! 
I have only one final semester to go nowā¦ 13 more weeks of study, after four and a half years! I am ALMOST across the finish line 
How is your new business/venture going?
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I love looking at my credit score/bank account now, and the importance of savings was drilled into me from the time I got my first job at 15, so it feels great to be so in control of my finances now and be able to squirrel away some dough each month while consistently paying my bills on-time, never forgetting it or not being able to. I watch that shit like a hawk.
When I was at my worst drinking 8-10 yrs back, I donāt even think I bothered to set up online banking and I never checked it. Overdraft fees CONSTANTLY, spending so recklesslyā¦paycheck in, paycheck gone, drunk all the time. Missed paying my (very few at the time) bills on the regular. Thank god I didnāt have credit cards back then, otherwise Iād have put myself in major debt.
One of my worst spends was one night getting wasted with two buddies on payday, we went to a strip club in Boston (my only time ever in a strip club, goodness what a waste of money and I felt so gross after). We were all really drunk obviously and we got swindled/tricked into going to the VIP area.
I woke up in the morning to find they had charged me $1,200. That VIP section was $500/half hour.
I still lived at home at the time (was working my first full-time job after college ā call center sales), and the next morning I had to ask my Mom to borrow money to get to work because I had blown my whole paycheck ā and then some, putting my bank account in the red, again ā at a grimy-ass strip club. Imagine telling your mother that. One of the most embarrassing moments of my life.
I am grateful that that is not my life anymore, and it never will be again.
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Day 15.
Prayer,meditation,&check in to start the day.It just seems to go better when I take the time.to start my day this way!
@anon60334405 hang in there 
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Lol Its apart of my workoutš. When I do my workouts Iām very calm I donāt let any aggression out kinda weird haha.
Day 159, I think Iām in good spirits 
will see haha. @Apes2020 tomorrow is the twelth and all the foggy moods and w.e I am feeling is clearing, that Mercury retrograde was a good read.
Thank you to everyone for all your kind words, I was in such a funk, this was prob one of my worse ones so farā¦ I say that about all of them tho 
. Anyway much love to all happy Saturday
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Congratulations sober twin!!!
I did a ton of research to find matcha powder that tasted close to the kind you get at Starbucks. Not sure if youāve ever had it but itās made with milkā¦can be iced or hot but you put it into a shaker with the milk, shake it and youāre good to go. Itās my go to in the summer (I know itās winter thereā¦super good with warmed milk too) and isnāt too much work. Iāll give you the name if youāre interested!
Feeling good, 2 weeks official! Been working out this week too 
enjoying my weekends, evenings, and definitely mornings much more!!
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Wahoo brilliant well done! And brilliant that the end is nearly in sight - youāve made it this far you can clear the final hurdle!
I have two weeks left in my job and then I will be staying on one day a week to help with a project which is great as it means I have a bit of income for the next few months while I get my own project off the ground. So far itās going well, just got to work out how to make some money out of it in the medium term 
Fortunately my bf earns enough to cover our bills and food so itās not an urgent issue but it would be nice to get a bit of pocket money from it!
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Aw Adrienne, you donāt owe anyone an apology. Be kind to yourself. Youāre here now, giving sobriety another chance and thatās all that matters. Sending you big hugs. 
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This was me 10 months ago. There was a limit on the amount I could overdraw so I opened a 2nd account and Iād overdraw that one too. My addict brain was thinking I could get twice the money. How stupid is that? lol. Had twice the fees and had to pay back twice the money. It would make me puke if I added up all those fees at $35 a pop. At first, I was wondering why a bank would let me do this, then it dawned on me, they make all this extra money knowing I have a regular direct deposit from work. Iām so happy those days are behind me and my bills are paid on time with money leftover.
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Way to go get that timer ticking again no worries
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Am I the only who wants something bad or exciting to happen in their life so itās not as boring?
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Wow! I can relate to all of that and then some. You worded it so well lol. Iāve blown or lost hundreds of dollars getting sloppy drunk and socializing. So embarrassing. I remember when living with my mom and younger brothers, I got so drunk that when I got home I went to the bathroom to puke, I was so hot and nauseous that I stripped down to no clothes and just lied there on the bathroom floor and then passed out. My little brother found me butt naked in the bathroom sleep in the morning lol smhā¦ Iāve lost hundreds of dollars in cash in my purse while being drunk and not securing it in a wallet. That will never be a problem in my life again, thatās for sure. My latest bouts of wreckless spending was Amazon shopping while drunk.
Just glad Iāve grown beyond that and have become addicted to Dave Ramseys network lol and have become obsessed with becoming debt free and saving.
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I donāt feel like that, but thatās because my life has been a rollercoaster lately. I do know how you feel though. After the divorce and before my mom meeting my terminally ill stepdad, life was fucking boring. Even gaming barely satisfied me.
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Iām sure Iām much older than you but I pray for boring days after what Iāve been through in life. House burning down and living in a hotel for a year while rebuilding is just a small example. Financial ruin from my addiction is another. A lifelong commitment to raising a daughter with disabilities will prevent me from ever having a boring day. All I can say, is be careful what you wish for, it can have long-term consequences.
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What a nice thing to wake up to! And I feel like thereās a good metaphor in there somewhere, letting the light in, showing us the way and chasing away the shadows.
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Day 32. Rough week. I have been under the weather. Dealing with poor health always gets me so down. I have Crohnās and have had it for 29 years and I still get so upset when I have to deal with limitations. I can go from feeling healthy and totally badass to awful and useless overnight. And this week has been full of doctors appointments, lab work and trying to still be useful at work (which I wasnt). No work for the next weekā¦doctors orders. And I feel guilty about it. I work for my oldest and dearest friends and I feel like Iām letting them down and I feel like everyone else at work doesnāt understand and view me as weak and unreliable. Or they feel sorry for me. I hate feeling this way. Absolutely defeated. Ugh. Such a sucky headspace to be in. The physical discomfort I feel is so much easier to deal with than the emotional and mental discomfort. Thanks for reading. Sharing probably helps
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What a beautiful post, and youāre really growing. Such an inspiration. All my love to you 
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Iām really sorry you are dealing with all that. I donāt have any words of wisdom, but just glad youāre here. I hope you start feeling better soon
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