Wow. I’m so amazed by your ability to take the high road and see her for what she is. You were a shining example to your employees! But I totally get why you cried. That’s a lot to listen to, take in and process. I really hope she’ll leave you alone and get some help. Keep your distance for sure. You don’t need that negativity in your life!! You’re doing so great! Glad you shared here and with your mom. You can always text me too ya know! 
Big hugs to you. 
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So sorry about Moose! That’s heartbreaking. Sounds Ike he’s had an amazing life as part of your family. It’s always so hard to lose a fur baby. Sending you love and prayers.
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Day 373
Still sober. Did my workout and my morning jog despite technical difficulties and waking up a little bit late. I’ve decided that exercise is part of my sober journey. It really helps the anxiety and keeps me from drinking sometimes. If you’re struggling today try a walk. It just might help!
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Thank you Michelle! 
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5 months clean of crystal meth today! Up and downs, but more clarity and moving forward despite the challenges. Couldnt have done it without being a part of this community. Have a great day!
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Thank you all @vaariesga @crystalclear 
I really appreciate the love and support. He’s gonna get tons of loving 
he’ll be sick of me 
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So sorry to hear about Moose. It is all the more heart breaking if you have to get Moose put down. Feels like you are killing your best friend. I wish you all the best and congratulations on your sobriety. 
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Thank you and I know I hate to be the one to make the decision. It’s really so hard. 
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I’m still 6’5” and I don’t know how to change that so the tall part still applies.
It’s been a few days since I shaved so @stubbly_Mctallman might be more accurate. 
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Well handled and well done! It is her problem. It sounds like she is either she is reframing the situation in a way she is catastrophising it or she is acting out a personality disorder such as NPD or APD and is trying to intimidate or gas-light you. I’m not (yet!) an expert nor am I aware of the background so I don’t know.
You are so lucky to have the support of colleagues. People with certain personality disorders will try and “triangulate” and turn people against you. Then again, people could be right to ask if she has been drinking. We know what can happen to rationality when we drink!
Respect to you for coping with it so well.
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Checking in on another sober hangover free morning.
Thinking and praying about
@anon86726034
I hope your parents are doing a bit better and God is giving you the strength you need to deal with the situation. I know how hard it can be when both parents are going down at the same time.
@anon89207786 praying for your family’s health and that y’all beat this Rona son of a bitch.
And @Dragonflygirl82 I know how much this hurts. It’s so awful and just knowing you as I do and seeing pics of Moose it’s breaking my heart too. You’ll know when it’s time to let go as hard as that is. Just be there with him. Hug him and love him.
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Feeling good again now finally my meds have been sorted out. I have been withdrawing from venlafaxine and pregabalin for a week.
Breaking out of sleep paralysis by entering an out of body perspective was interesting and I did not know I had a portal in my room for demons to come and go through! 
Other than that it was not fun. Fortunately our building is in lockdown so I could not be tempted to get some booze and I am sure I could have quickly got pregabs from a dealer here in Eastbourne. Happy clean living everyone.
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Checking in on day 56 without alcohol. Feeling a little blah but dont really want to talk about it.
@Girlinterrupted Proud of you and how you handled that witch lady. How does someone like that even succeed in life or stay in business?? Are you able to block her number? Lol Glad you have support!!
@Dragonflygirl82 I am sad to hear about poor Moose! It is a blessing that you get to mindfully give him love and affection as you prepare to say goodbye. My dog of 10 years suddenly passed away out of nowhere when someone was watching her, I was 37 weeks pregnant and I never got to say goodbye. I regret not going to see her dead body. I was afriad I would go into labor. Ugh it was aweful. The pain of losing a pet is so deep. We shall meet them at the bridge. 
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Thank you for the prayers Eric.
My sister is corona free now, but there still is a huge chance my mom is infected since she is incredibly tired which is very out of the ordinary for her. If she has corona, then so do I probably. I think there’s a decent chance I have corona, but that I may be asymptomatic
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You have the patience of an angel. Well done is keeping your cool. And staying strong in sobriety. X
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I honestly can’t believe it but at half past I will be one whole week clean from Cocaine! I’m in so much pain (Fibromyalgia) and I did fixate on using from 5am when I awoke, until around midday when I was able to transform my mindset, have a shower, and go for a drive. I’ve also been out to get groceries for the weekend. I’ve rented a movie from Prime called 28 Days, found it mentioned on a thread here, so I’m going to feed my cats, eat some food, and watch the movie. I did manage to get out for a walk on Weds and Thurs, but haven’t today so far, so I’ll be pleased if I do, but if not, atleast I’m sober 
Edited to add: I hate how the obsessive compulsiveness completely takes over my mind at times, for an hour or more at a time so far, sometimes a few times a day, and it terrifies me, because in those moments I’m convinced I’m going to pick up, the addict demon manipulates and lies to the sober part of my mind and finds excuses and reasons to use. I’m just so grateful that sober part of my mind has the upper hand at the moment, and pray it strengthens with each battle, because this part of me never ever wants to reset the timer 
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Yeah, I made the mistake of sitting down to watch 28 Days Later and it was actually 28 Days I had picked. Not quite the same film lol. Enjoy 
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Haha no not quite! Thanks 
- Felt like @Clarity this morning. Blah. Also @M-be-free49 asked for a pic from a bike ride. So I did a good 120km one before posting here and feel a lot better now. I need food so I will cook next. Sober and clean. Love from Amsterdam and 't Gooi.
@Dragonflygirl82 One of the things that makes this stuff so hard is that it’s us that have to make the decision. Been there a couple of times. Some of the hardest moments of my life. You’re in my thoughts, both of you. Hugs.
@Girlinterrupted You’re really strong. So glad you don’t drink over stuff like this.
@crystalclear Or a bike ride friend!
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A longer version of ‘the only thing that’s constant is change’ - something I keep coming back to as I try and work out what the hell I am doing with myself at the moment! Trying to lean into the uncertainty, learn from the challenges and remember that it’s ok not to have it all figured out…
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