Ahhhhhhhh congrats!!! 
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That sucks. Surprised the document recovery function won’t work.
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I have the very rare Saturday where I have absolutely nowhere to be, and am committed to no one.
I will take this day as a glorious blessing, watch some war documentary, and maybe take a nap. Naps are hugs we give to ourselves.
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Day 833
This morning I went to my Saturday AM meeting. Having a chat outside beforehand, and George (who I’ve referred to previously – one of the “elder statesman”, if you will, of the sober community here) asked me if I’d like to come with him and one other guy to speak to some young people at a detox a few towns over. It’ll be this coming Thursday night.
Totally unexpected, since although I am not new to sobriety and have learned a lot - I am still so new to the actual AA program. I am honored, humbled, and very excited about this wonderful opportunity to go and hopefully help some people by sharing my experiences with them.
Especially with it being young people - maybe they’ll connect with me more, being on the young side (nearly 32 is young guys, right?..right?) Even in my own story, I consider myself to be so fortunate that I caught my problem and addressed it as early in my life as I did. Really looking forward to doing this. I think it’s just getting cleared with one of the other guys who’s involved in facilitating the visits to the facility, but I should be all set to go.
So anyhow – just got back from a run, heading to my Dad’s shortly, then home after that for the Revs game and then hopefully the Celtics can get it together against Miami (although there is NO way I can stay up for most of that game with tip-off at 8:30). The sun is shining and there is air in my lungs. There are good things in my life to be grateful for.
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That’s cool, Tristan, having you go talk with the young guys. They will definitely relate to you. And you look at least 10 years younger than 32. Look forward to hearing about it!
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What a great opportunity! So awesome that you’re doing that. And yes, 32 is in fact young 
This old gal can confirm 
Also, I’m with you on the early bedtime 
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Checking in at 114.44 days…
Before I start babbling, I want to say how terribly sorry I am to hear about Moose, @Dragonflygirl82. Courtney, sounds like he had a wonderful life and that’s so special. I can’t even imagine how much it hurts. Our fur babies are like family. I actually look at mine as human. So weird. Sending my love 
So, yesterday was so busy and I didn’t even settle in for the day until after 11pm, so I didn’t get to update on the gal who has been accosting me for the past 3-4 days. I will say I deserve an Oscar for my performance yesterday. To complicate matters, we share office space, she’s upstairs and I’m downstairs. We tell each other when we come and go, so I just stuck to that. When she got in, I said good morning in a friendly but no overly cheery way. She no longer has my respect, so I will not give her the peace of mind that our relationship has not changed. She was overly nice and kissing up quite a bit. I kept my office door closed for a good portion of the day as I had quite a few zoom meetings.
I read the emails to my therapist and told him about the conversations this week. He’s very proud of me and said I could not have handled it any better. I woke up still feeling very dark, heavy, and depressed. However, as the day went on I started to feel a lot better. The things she said about me were not true, and I 100% know that, so why give her bat shit words any power (thank you Zoloft and Buspar 
) I will be extremely rigid with my boundaries with this one. I spoke with the listing broker for the building we are in, and if she decides to leave at the end of our lease, I’m good to take it over.
I also had it planned out that if she came down to my office to say I hope it’s not awkward, that I would just say it’s fine and there is no need to discuss it any further. She would not be able to stop herself from the negative dialogue and start explaining her bat shit reasoning. I can’t imagine what it must be like to be in her head. She has to be very unhappy and that makes me sad. I like her well enough when she’s not being abrasive, but damn.
Happy sober Saturday people!!!
And as promised, I’m calling your ass out @PeacefulMind1974 Love you 
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You are so strong!!! I hope you got a good nights rest and are feeling better today. Do some extra self care. Hugs to you!
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Day 12 here. Almost two weeks. I’m pretty excited about that. Not sure what is in store for today yet. I haven’t been sleeping too well but last night was better. My stomach is still upset. I’ve been reading up on what I can do to help decrease years of inflammation I built up there. Maybe read my book. Go for a walk with the doggies. Probably about it. Not too exciting but at least I’ll be staying out of trouble!
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Day 12: Distracting myself from current events today as my form of self care. Grief is powerful and there has been so much of those emotions in my life the past year. I was wide awake at 5 am again, made breakfast, chatted with my Mami, and now I’m enjoying the gorgeous sunny morning tending to my beloved house plants. We are talking about rearranging house for winter hibernation, possibly moving a sofa to the basement where the TV and music room is. Just taking the day a piece at a time feels good today.
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Love your plants! I’m a big fan of house plants too! Enjoy your day Rosa!
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Watching now! Thanks for the recommendation
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I can relate so well to so much of this. On any pre-2020, pre-TS attempts at “scaling back” (complete sobriety was a terrifying thought) the notion of an alcohol free weekend was daunting and simply, to me, one full of unnecessary sacrifice.
Upon reflection - I think until I committed to being AF, until I removed the option of a drink ‘now and then’ (lol) - of course they were full of sacrifice. I hadn’t actually committed to the alternative, hadn’t explored how good it could be to spend a weekend truly as I like, completely present, devoid of shame and regret. Like you say, just… normal. Beautifully normal.
Cravings still come, mostly around habits and associations, but as so many people on here have described before me - you get through those hurdles once and then they become easier. Just like you described…
- Lots of highway travel for me - and something cold and rewarding would be opened while the car was still being unloaded. But now it’s seltzer and some kind of treat - homemade guac and tortillas
- The Friday of a long weekend? The first few were rough, but much less so now…
- Even finishing work after a long day, it needs a new ritual. I started walking the dog right after work every day, to prevent any urges from taking over, and now I so look forward to it, and by the end of the walk I’m grateful to have the evening ahead of me.
There are lots of people on here, and lots of threads, that talk about navigating all of this in a marriage/relationship. @Dazercat comes to mind. For my part, I have some good role models in real life who can go to pubs, serve wine with dinner at home, and all without making a big deal of it - just shrug and decline when it is offered to them. “Oh, I don’t drink”. No biggie. Always aware a craving may come up, but they have disarmed the power that a drink right in front of them has, and they will always choose sobriety instead.
Now I’ve rambled. Avoiding the saturday morning chores ritual! So much easier without a headache!
Thanks for your post and for sharing. 
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Just checking in! Been missing you all as I haven’t been on here recently. I have been busy baking cakes for others which has taken up alot of my time (I shouldn’t neglect TS tho as its truly my biggest support group right now for my recovery). Been feeling overwhelmed though and under stress. Money is tight financially with hubby not working and me only working alittle (as well as the little bit of money that comes in from baking). I have picked up shifts though but they don’t have the availability to hire me on full time. Might have to start looking for extra work. Other than that, I’m just trying to keep pushing forward with my recovery. Things have been up and down with that. Also trying to do things everyday to make myself feel better about myself… exercise, eating better, wearing a little makeup etc. Hope everyone continues to do well Here are 2 of my most recent cakes!
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Glad you checked in. Nice to hear from ya. Great looking cakes.
I hope your sobriety is going well.
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Aw… thanks for the mention. Y’all letting Americans into your country yet??
Get me outta here!!!
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@RosaCanDo and @Dazercat deal! but only if you bring your pets. And maybe your nicer temps for just a little longer
Edit: I will post a picture on the garden thread. Ah, the north!
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Imagine the real caravan of immigrants that will head to the Canadian border if trump wins in November. 
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