Hey everyone. Love you all have a grateful day and keep killing sobriety.
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Checking in. I love how I always have to look at my phone to know what day Iām on. 426. I like to keep track but I canāt remember what day it is, never mind what day Iām on. 
Iām grateful I ended up being too busy to check in here yesterday because my back pain is getting so much better. Thank you all for the kind words and well wishes. Iām grateful I have my health. And very grateful I wonāt be spending another week in bed. And of course Iām grateful Iām sober. Hopefully after I walk the dogs this morning I can take another walk and do some light stretches. I must listen to my age and body and not over do it. Itās so hard. But I will not go out there and hit the 3 1/2 mile trail today. Slow and steady right? Yāall stay sober. Just for today. 
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Youāre here now and thatās what matters!
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Thank you!! Glad you enjoyed it!
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Thank you and youāre welcome!!
- Today is much better then yesterday. I feel really good. I am also feeling very blessed. Got up for work this morning and my 18yr old daughter always gets up around the same time and she talked to me as I was getting ready for the day. We had some laughs and talked about what she was going to do today. It just makes me so happy that our relationship is growing and getting better because weāve had some rough times. I have my weekly AA meeting today excited since I missed last week because I was working late. Sending everyone here positive thoughts and vibes! Praying for strength for those who need it and know youāre not alone
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Hi Natascha, great your 3 days again. I just thought, not even god can change the past. (or in German : HƤtte, hƤtte, Fahrradkette) It is difficult for me to let go but living in the if I had not, ifā¦ It doesnāt help me today. I have to accept and learn from it. Many errors I keep on repeating constantly and get angry again and again. I think my HP is sitting somewhere and laughing. Okay, there we go again.
Keep on working on today and in a blink of a time you will say, yeah, 60 days 
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Not quite this symptom. I have always different although I donāt cut back. I quit cold turkey. Symptoms ranged from normal headache and sleeping 12hrs a day for 2 weeks or so and last time during fasting I had horrible back pain (lower back) which I never have. I can tell you maybe tomorrow or Friday as I will start tomorrow my diabetes vacations 
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Iām so glad to end another day sober. There was no way I was gonna be able to face today under the influence, it was just one of those hectic daysā¦ In bed tired, not blacked out. Feels hella good 
wishing you all well 
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@RosaCanDo thank you that means a lot 
@nwags welcome back, congrats on 3 days 
@AdvntrLane Happy Anniversary 
and thank you for sharing something so personal with us
@Bomdhil congrats on your month, itās so great to see this
@Tomek Iām so sorry that your father hasnāt found acceptance yet, but Iām so glad youāre making progress in dealing with these things
@Dazercat Iām so pleased your back pain is easing up, slow and steady for sure
205 days no alcohol
173 days no cocaine.
Something that hasnāt happened in a long time, but I was struck by a sudden night of insomnia last night, I think it must have been the reintroduction of nicotine, but also may have been anxiety about getting my first Covid shot this morning. I feel okay apart from a beast of a migraine and a some chills, but very grateful Iāve had my initial dose, and for the break from relapse dreams.
My recovery worker called me today, I hadnāt heard from her since day 88 so it was so good to share how my numbers have grown. She also told me she asked how my interview went and they said I came across really well and almost got the job, so that was nice to hear. This is the place where I reapplied again yesterday. Really hoping I get another interview because Iām sure I could do even better this time around and itās the only job I feel I could do right now, with my mental and physical health issues that have kept me off work for 14 months. Iām so ready to give my all to something new that is so important to me.
My vape liquid just arrived, so now I hope for the last time, I am restarting my diet tomorrow and conquering this binge-eating disorder demon and getting my body back in a much healthier statešš»
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So touching! What a lovely tribute for a beautiful love story. Thanks for sharing.
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Iām so glad to read your updates, all good things! Except the insomniaā¦that was me last night, too. 
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Day 93ā¦
My urges to use were through the roof yesterday after an unexpected encounter with some people that I use to know that I randomly bumped into , they were high as a kite and from 1.30pm till I went to bed at 11pm, the amount of mini emotional battles I had with myself was phenomenonalā¦after one big block of chocolate, 6 episodes of the hand maids tale, Thai food home delivery, a can of coke- I managed to not give in and beat the demon that tried to posses me all day. It was a difficult day. I have not felt like that in 11 monthsā¦ Now its the next day, I woke up at 5.30am and now Iām sitting in bed about to journal waiting to watch the sun rise. Today is a new day the fourth day of fall. My favourite season! 
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Howās everyone? Checking in day 6 no booze or cocaine, feeling good I got asked to go for drinks after class but felt good saying no. Gonna go to Walmart today and look for a new TV. Have a good day everyone!
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I didnāt use porn today! Thanks!
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Thank you so much!
Congrats on 205 and 173 of no alcohol or cocaine!
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Thank you! And youāre welcome!
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Checking in for Day 3. Good day so far so other than school.
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Checking in.
Talking to someone in a recovery group yesterday about recovery and mental health, and how difficult it can feel to find balance. Like all these things we have to do to keep on an even keel, itās a real commitment. How easy it can be to slip into a resentful mindset about it, feeling frustrated about having to do all these things just to not feel like a total mess. And how that turns into resentment for the activities themselves, even though they are actually nice things to do.
Today I am trying to be grateful for the things I get to do that help make difficult days a little easier.
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I got my brother and one of my friends trying to convince me to get drunk and donāt have respect for my sobriety. Its actually really pissing me the fuck off. Pardon my language but itās beyond frustrating. I want to sober up so I can save money and move to a new a city but its impossible when I got these kind of people always pulling on my damn shoulder.
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