Checking in on day #288. I hope everyone has a good start to the week!
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Day 291 clean and sober today. Spent some time with my new sponsor yesterday which was cool. He has so much wisdom from the 30 years heās been sober. Weāre going to meet every Sunday morning at his house which is really cool. Emotions have been debilitating at times and itās a fight to regain balance for me. Have a great day everyone, love you guys 
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Hit that fucking gym man, run those milesā¦ release those natty endorphins. Did you see if you can get your levels checked yet? Reach out when youāre struggling man
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@Girlinterrupted Congratulations on 10 months. Your shares are appreciated and your growth is inspiring.
@anon60334405 There are going to be good days and bad days but a bad day sober is better than a good day drunk or high. Stay focused on the benefits of sobriety and know this will pass. Youāre my badass bro & youāve got this.
@Dolse71 Youāre doing it and I love the new you.
@Rockstar24777 You say itās a fight to regain balance yet youāre doing it and Iām fucken proud of you.
286 days. Spent the afternoon yesterday driving and walking around lake areas and climbing a big hill to a little church. I continue to emphasize that keeping it simple and active keeps smiles on all our faces. Between the fresh air & the physical exertion I was completely tuckered out last night and found myself in bed early and had a great nightās sleep. Where Iām sitting and how Iām feeling in comparison to two weeks ago is astonishing. Had a bit of a chat with my Dad and again it came up that doing nothing is necessary. I have a job interview Wednesday and the anxiety about obtaining employment briefly returned. However, my Dad told me that maybe Iām not meant to be working right now, maybe Iām meant to be doing nothing but working on me. I sat with this for a while and have regained comfort in being where Iām supposed to be. ODAAT and Iām doing fine.
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Hey Mike, first time Iām actually responding or talking with you. Iām 9 days back to sobriety. Iām going to ask you to hang on tight and hear about my last 457 days. (Had to Google the dates for the number). 457 days is just about how long I was sober when I said fuck it, I wanna have a drink, fuck it, its the holidays, fuck it Iām in a funk, fuck it, I donāt care.
Whatever your reasons are and however many there are for throwing in the towel Iād be willing to bet there are more and better reasons to stay clean.
After 485 days of sobriety, I said fuck it and couldnāt get out of the quicksand I had created for myself. I stopped exercising completely, to the point that (even now) I felt like I had concrete running through my veins. I became a joke, passing out, drinking all day everyday, driving drunk, showing up at my kids baseball acting like life was nothing but one big party. But I was the only person at the party. Wife and kids were embarrassed as hell. Iām surprised I didnāt get a DWI. I was definitely in a spiral and it was because I had one holiday drink. Weāre addicts, alcoholics or whatever other terms can be used and we canāt trust our brain to make the right decision under stress. Do yourself and your girls a favor, hang on as tightly as necessary until this passes. Donāt say fuck it, itās totally not worth it man. I was 485 days sober when an said fuck it. 457 days later Iām fighting as hard as I can to get out of my own world and back to real life. Keep going Mike, you know itās the only way and its worth itā¦
P.S. I fight with my mother all the time, sheās a narcissistic, alcoholic with no time for her grandchildren and Iāve just learned to let go of my anger about that. For my own health.
Hang in there my manā¦
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Checking in at the end of day 85.
Not much to report today.
Had along chat with my wife about our situation. We are so different when it comes to booze that itās hard for us to see each otherās perspectives. Weāve agreed to work on it and keep communicating. 
Have a great sober day, wherever you are.
Goodnight. 
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Ok, so Iām back again to spend some more time with you lovely people. Jumped back in on 3/21/21. This time however Iām not going to be counting days. Each day sober is its own reward, not the total number of days. For me as the daily count gets higher, Iāve learned that I started to develop a false sense of accomplishment. You know, im sober 300 days, letās reward this number with a sip. No, not this time. I donāt care anymore how many days I have sober, Iām just gonna keep moving forward with blinders and Iāll not look back.
So Iām sorry to say that Iāll be filling your and my days and ears with a lot of blah blah and maybe some if it will even make sense to a few.
What Iāve learned is I canāt continue on the path I was on (pretty sure it would have ended badly). Iāve also learned that so many of you here have been an inspiration and a source of great support (its a long list and Iām sure you know who you all are) thank you for that. Itās always been challenging but also many times has been quite fun because of you fine folks. So Iām truly sorry to say that youāll be seeing my (emoji) face around here for some time to come. Anyway, Thank you again to all of you who have brought so much into my sober world (again, you know who you are). Youāre all the best!!
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Hi Mike, I really hope that you know it is not true that nothing has changed in the last 420 days. You feel down and thatās life. I am also always somewhat pissed when I find myself in my hole,alone,again and again.but I learn to let go and take the ladder you all and the universe and often a new day give me. And you did this successfully the last 420 days. Do you know why you let your routines go? That is maybe a question to think about. Keep posting, Mike. 
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I am sorry for your loss, Conor 
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Wowā¦amazing photo!
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Hello. Iām up to 2 weeks sober. For me itās more like going back to normal because Iāve been mostly sober for 25 plus years. My poison of choice is wine, Iām trying to be hyper aware of wine-positive thoughts and images in my head. I know I have to catch them before I start thinking Iām missing out on something āgood.ā Iām not. I feel much calmer and cheerful. And all around better. Iāve never posted in this thread, I hope Iām using it appropriately. I was feeling slightly vulnerable to those ābeastā thoughts today and wanted some extra reinforcement.
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Thank you Michelle!!!
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Iām sorry for your loss Conorā¦
āIf there is a meaning in life at all, then there must be a meaning in suffering. Suffering is an ineradicable part of life, even as fate and death. Without suffering and death, human life cannot be complete.ā ā Viktor Frankl.
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Great job on 2 weeks! I play my day in my head, including what it will be like to wake up without a post wine apolcolypse hangover! Keep checking in and reaching out if you need support! Welcome to the thread 
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Sending Hugs Conor. Sorry its been so rough lately.
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Checking in, day 13 free from alcohol. My sleep has been getting better. I zonked out at 10pm last night and woke feeling awesome today. The advice given of just putting yourself to bed and making yourself get up at the hours you want seems to be working. Itās like Iām retraining my body to be normal lol. Iām thinking of adding the gym to my mornings soon, but weāll see. Taking it slow.
Side note, my wife and I finally fixed our finances this year and weāre calling a realtor today to hopefully get the ball rolling on buying a house. Wish me luck!
Hope everyone has a great Monday!
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Sorry I didnāt respond to this the other day. Youāre totally right. The shame does come up here and there, but I donāt dwell on it. Iām so proud of myself and happy about being sober to let it truly bother me. In a way though, itās kind of motivating me a bit to keep putting as much distance between me and the last night I was drunk as possible. But yeah, focusing mostly on getting better 
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Looking back on this, I feel I was a little off. I do have sober friends on here but I never let it get to a personal level.m just felt I had to clear that up? Lol
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@Teammeyer2021 congrats on 2 weeks 
@Mischa congrats on 6 weeks
@Conor689908 sorry for your loss, sending strength 
@anon60334405 sending strength
@Alba89 congrats on 2 weeks
231 days no alcohol.
199 days no cocaine.
5 days no binge-eating.
Iāve done so much decluttering and packing today. Loads more stuff going to charity when the shops reopen after 12th April hopefully. Working towards a more minimalist environment for my next home. It feels so freeing to detach from things and let stuff go. Itās so much easier than all the times Iāve tried before, I think the literal fresh start Iām about to have has given me a new perspective.
Tomorrow Iām going to bubble wrap all the breakable things Iām donating to charity and packing it properly, as Iāve just been adding more and more stuff to the hallway before giving it too much thought and risking holding on to it. Will be good to have it out of sight in boxes as it looks rather messy in my hallway right now.
Iāve also declutter all of my paper files today, the āto shredā pile is taking up most of my kitchen worktops 
Then thereās just the kitchen cupboards and drawers to go through, but thatās quite a big job in itself.
I feel like Iām actually having fun with this mission 
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