Hi 
Itās my fourth day 
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9 months is just awesome, congrats! Keep on keeping on ODAAT! 
Blessings and sobriety!
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Hey all, checking in on day 321. I hope everyone has a good start to the weekend!
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I love that Buddha, I have to admit that Iāve got a lot of Buddhaās. I guess you can call it a collection. 
Falling leaves? Ours havenāt even started to grow yet.
Happy 1st of May, Iām glad youāre feeling happy and you definitely deserved a little gift.
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Day 323 clean and sober today. Havenāt heard anything about the job yet but Iām enrolling in classes Monday and will go talk to them after I enroll. Iām so grateful to be here with you all and checking in every day, itās been a huge part of my recovery. I hope everyone has a wonderful day today, love you guys!!! 
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Congratulations Danni youāre doing AMAZING!!!
Sorry youāre having a hard time lil sis but Iām super proud of you for walking it sober. Love and hugs!!!
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Iām here, Iām alive and Iām sober.
Day 244
1st of May.
I talked to my Ma, she said Pa was a little better today. My oldest sister also got Covid-19 now and sheās not doing well at all. But I donāt talk to much with her so Iām not really worried,not yet.
My husband and tweenie is away helping the okd lady today and tomorrow. Theyāre on the way home in a little while. So me and the boys had a nice and calm day here. Because itās the 1st of May we did some āMayingā that means having a picnic or Fika outside for the first time during the year.
We also listen to The Swedish version of āLe Internationaleā because today itās International workerās day today. And I told the boys a story about how one of my very first memories is from a 1st of May demonstration with my grandparents and parents. I remember sitting in my stroller waving a red flag, when the demonstration was over and everyone was gathered and grabbed each others hands to start singing together I was to short. So I couldnāt reach, and because of that my grandpa put me on the table so I could stand there singing, holding him in one hand and my grandma in the other.
Just when I was done telling that story, and was about to start the music on my phone. Two white butterflies, the first ones weāve seen this year appeared right on our fika table. They just sat there, like they where looking at us. When my grandmother passed away a few years ago we think she appeared as a white butterfly for my sister. Because grandma loved white butterflies, it was her favorite. And with the strong connection between my grandparents and workerās day celebration (I remember almost every years celebrating together with them, or when my grandpa passed away, together with grandma only) Iām sure it was them coming for Fika.
After they flew away we played the song, and played some soccer outdoors. Now weāre back inside.
Iām feeling hopeful today, and I might have one of my, as my husband calls it āCreative project ideas that makes his work doubled or tripleā ideas on turning our garden into a business project. He said we should discuss it later. But I actually like my idea and Itās something we both would enjoy. He likes to sell, and do business and I would love to work from home and be out in the garden.
But weāll see what he says.
Iām still feeling hopeful about the future, and determined to do something about my ideas very soon. A feeling that Iāve been missing for months.
Happy 1st of May everyone I hope your day is awesome. 
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Hiya
I know you probably feel terrible but your message just really helped me. Iām only on day 6 today and bank Holiday weekend, sun shining, I was toying with the idea of just one as well. I donāt think I was going to do it, but itās just annoying having that thought to battle with. Your message reminded me that this just one idea is a fantasy, and suddenly the craving vanished. So, Iām sorry you are having another day 1. This time round I gave my bank cards to my partner to hide from me for the first few days so that Iād have no option! That actually did help! Gotta do what you gotta do 
You can do this 
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Love it Danni, super job, you are officially full term. Hope you enjoyed your family time.
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Beautiful, mister. Youāre doing it! Iām amazed that Iām doing the sober thing, too!
P.S. I love that you and I are Tomās friends outside of here. Heās pretty special, isnāt he.
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You amaze me. Your posts help me put things into context, help me remember what is important in this life. Sending you big love on your 9 fucking months!! Youāre a rockstar. 
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Yesterday was my 50th birthday. I took it off Facebook and LinkedIn in. Not exactly happy about being 50 when I still feel so young. Mind you itās an emotional trauma thing and I was stunted emotionally at a young age. Probably why I married someone 20 years younger. I donāt feel like a grownup. Itās super weird.
Anyway, my mom flat out forgot which is odd because Iām super close with her, I think. I donāt know.
My dad, who I have zero relationship with texted me around 9pm:
Iām sorry, but what? Love me? Hearts? I ignored it until this morning and just remote back āThans, I love you tooā. It felt so fake. My mom probably told him that I feel like he doesnāt like me. Thatās another story. Anyway, the text made me very uncomfortable. I guess heās trying. But now? Heās done so much to hurt me over the years. I was raised with zero self esteem. I donāt think it was intentional, but itās the reality.
Glad yesterday is over.
ETA: I was originally supposed to go to their house to ācelebrateā but after the blow up a few weeks ago and how it impacted me, I canceled it. So I donāt know if this is his way of making me feel guilty. I was perfectly happy being alone on my doomsday birthday. 
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Day 15 today. Feeling really good. My girlfriend went out with some of her friends last night and got real trashed, and they all feel like today shit today. No judgement or sober smugness here, but Iām glad I donāt have to feel that way anymore. To each their own, but itās not for me.
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I 100% relate!! Glad you spent it how you wanted/needed to.
PS: I have been practicing the art of not knowing my age. Seriously 
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