Checking in daily to maintain focus #33

Day 43. Feeling really good. Daily gratitude lists, meditations, sober discord community and secular AA meetings for support.

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Amazing art!!

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On my 3rd day sober :v:t2:

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Milestone celebrating with an early morning coffee.

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Iā€™m so sorry for your loss. My condolences for the family.

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D 343
Iā€™m visiting my folks who live across the country. No people drama but Iā€™m all over the place emotionally. It always happens when Iā€™m here. For years Iā€™ve tried to change these surroundings and people to ease some of my turmoil. Now Iā€™m realising itā€™s me who has to change!! But itā€™s fucking hard and Iā€™m not really managing. Still, Iā€™m revelling in the quietness of the countryside. Iā€™m yearning it.

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Checking in, day 308 no alcohol, day 58 no smoke. I have a lot of work, September is full of deadlines but I have no motivation at all. I finally sleep well and Iā€™m a lot more open and settled than before. I can truly appreciate the people who stayed in my life. I learn not to demand but accept.

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Checking in, long time no see on this thread! Iā€™m doing pretty well other than some insomnia the last couple nights, which is nothing new. Iā€™m working on better sleep ā€œhygiene,ā€ as in an evening wind down routine, no devices/screens after a certain time (so hard!) and not eating after a certain time, also. I think I might start journaling, at least jotting down thoughts from the day when I first get in bed, too. At least Iā€™ve been good about going to bed when my husband does (he works, I donā€™t). I had a thought recently about reframing using the word ā€œworryā€ as often as I do, because what it really is usually is that Iā€™m ā€œconsideringā€ or ā€œanticipatingā€ something. Worry is so attached to anxious feelings and words are important - they can shape how we end up thinking and feeling about things. So Iā€™m not worried about saying ā€œworry,ā€ Iā€™m contemplating how I use the word and how I can train myself to change that pattern. Hope that makes sense. All in all itā€™s a good day because I went to bed sober and Iā€™ll be sober today. Have a good one, amigos. :heartpulse:

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Day 394
Urgh, procrastination, binging, then wilful mindreading and defensiveness about the procrastination and binging.
At least no drinking tho.

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Day 454 clean and sober today. Sore from the gym which is awesome. If nothing changes, nothing changes. Have a great day everyone, love you guys! :sunglasses::metal:t2:

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Good morning friends,day 299!
Today is a dark day, one I have been dreadingā€¦ I had to put on long pants and shoes and drive into the office today for work. :frowning:

I am not planning to stay here all day and I wonā€™t be back in person until someone makes a stink about it. Today is a day that the majority of us are back in the office, so I wanted to have my presence counted.
My boss and his boss both donā€™t care if I work from home forever, but these decisions are coming down from the tops of big buildings in Charlotte and NYC. Youā€™d think that running a big bank would come with more important things to worry about than where each person sits. Rant over.

Anyway, thrilled to be sober and otherwise happy.

Have an awesome day! I am going to do mine sober!

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Checking in at the end of day 249.
Sober and tired.
Have a great sober day, wherever you are.
Goodnight. :zzz::sleeping:

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Checking in day 2. Yesterday I did some jump roping and some push ups, and when my daughter autumn got off the bus, she came running across to me and I thought she was happy and as soon as she got to me she broke down crying saying the kids were bullying her. Itā€™s like what do you do? I know I wonā€™t let it happen two days. Today Iā€™m heading to get my exercise bike and going to set that up. Hope you all have a good day

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Hey everyone, checking in on sober day #452. I hope everyone has a good one!

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2nd check inā€¦ I know this probably also goes on the Spotify thread, but Iā€™m making this morning in the office more bearable. I have my ear buds in and ignoring all of the noise and people around meā€¦ Enjoying some great jazzā€¦

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Last year at the same date I was struggling to get sober before starting my new internship. I was trying to stop since July and even before and I didnā€™t know if I would be able to go to work when I was supposed to start. I did my first week there sweating like if I was in a jungle. Then on the very first Friday I couldnā€™t resist and blacked out again the whole weekend. Unfortunately I self harmed myself that weekend and that was the last time I drank, because I was afraid of myself. The next week I walked with shame in my head everyday because I didnā€™t think I could do it, I thought I was hurt too deep, a waste, and impostor. But I chose to give up controlling what I couldnā€™t control. When shame and guilt and craving arises, I chose to let them be, while relaying on hope in another day. I chose to trust instead of trying to avoid feeling. I trusted that I could not drink anymore. I hurt myself enough to know that. I chose to get help from therapist and outpatient addiction therapy (one phone call every other week), and told my girlfriend that it will be rough.
Here we are 360 days later, with almost a year of continuous sobriety.
Taking it one day at a time was my moto. Pushing it to the next day helped me a lot. ā€œCancelling the dayā€ to just focus on taking care of me when I felt like drinking.

That new seasons brings back memories.
Anyways, Iā€™m rambling here.

Looking for inspiration for a celebration for my first ever year of sobriety.

Have a good day yā€™all!

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Great job almost at that one month!:metal::sunglasses: keep up the hard work

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Day 404 feeling great and in control of life, struggled for quite some time after my one year mark but decided to get on SSRIs to treat my depression, life has gotten better since, always help yourselfšŸ¤˜ staying busy and getting things figured out for the next step in life

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Checking in. Have the day off today. Got some cleaning done, shopping, dentist appointment. Was on the graveyard aswell. Make it nice for my grandmother, uncle and father. I dont go often. So I feel guilty for that, but I dont like to think and feel those feelings I get there. And its a bit triggering, I guess its because I want the feelings away. Not picked up.

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Day 415! LOL lots of complaining in this check in! Feel free to zoom byā€¦ haha just getting it off my chest.
Ohhh man yā€™all itā€™s a battle in my head right now. Trying to stay positive but itā€™s hard.
We came home from Utah and the house looked like a frat house. Trash and clothes everywhere. There was a pretty bad leak upstairs that my SO addressed by just putting a towel over it. He had clogged my friends toilet for the 3rd time in 2 weeks even though I keep telling him not to use that bathroom. TMI, and then to top it all off I go outside this morning and he had nicked her car pretty bad. (She let him drive it while we were in Utah) Thats going to be a fun conversation, she doesnā€™t know yet. I kinda lost my temper last night. Which is rare.
Before my friend moved in here I had become professional at overlooking my significant otherā€™s shortcomings but now with her constantly commenting and complaining about him itā€™s really exacerbating things in my head.
Whatever. To be continuedā€¦ :expressionless::+1:

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