Congrats on 3 days Jay. Great start.
Do you do any meditation? Lots of great guided meditation apps out there. I use the Breethe app. It helps me a lot. The early days can be terrifying. They’re hard.
Break it down. Just for today. That’s all that matters.
When you don’t drink today. You win. We Don give a shit about tomorrow.
Hang in there.
Keep checking in.
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Anyone who says people in the gym are too busy with themselves don’t really understand the gym culture.
I wish I could take away your pain. People can be very cruel. I grew up overweight in the 80s and 90s. Through the years I’ve lost weight and kept it off through a lot of learning and determination. But here’s the thing. It took me many years before I could truly understand that I was no longer over weight. You cannot escape that psychology so easily because those scars run so deep.
It would be great if everyone was aware of others, genuine, and kind; however, the truth is that most people are not. It is not so easy to just ignore people when we have deep wounds inside that have never healed.
Normally, my first impulse is to try and give advice, see how I can be the most useful to the person in front of me who is clearly suffering; but, I’m not going to do that and instead I’m going to simply give you a hug from afar and tell you that it’s okay to be sad and hurt, or even to feel angry at how things have turned out.
This journey is a dark and miserable path full of mud, rain, and tall slopes. That dark cave you came from seems to be much more cozy, no matter how much you wanted to get away from it. But I know you can do this and I’m sure I’m not the only one here who feels that way. Let us put a blanket on your back and hold an umbrella over your head for the moment while you rest from the struggle, and when you’re ready to move forward again we’ll all walk with you along the way as much as we can.
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Checking in Day 39 Alcohol Free / Day 285 Cannabis Free
Feeing beat but still here.
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I know where you’re coming from bud, except I was on the less talked of other end of the weight spectrum… 
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Plan for today to gradually manoeuvre me out of a rut and back on track:
- Do some calisthenics work-out
- Shower, shave, brush teeth
- Meditate for 15mins
- Learn spanish on duolingo to warm up the brain
- Get my life moving again by getting and staying ontop of my most important to-do-list
- Practice some violin
- Take a walk outside
- Check-out on here
- Lights out by 10 from now on for better mornings
Procrastination is an addiction of it’s own to learn to overcome, today must always be better than yesterday for tomorrow to be better than today… ODAAT your dream will become reality… Enjoy your day, and do something to prove you love yourself 
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- Coffee. New work week about to start. Had a really beautiful hike yesterday, through an area I didn’t know. Woods and heather and sand drifts and hardly any people about. Therapy after was intense, we tried to re-script some bad youth experience of mine. Not sure it worked but it did come with some sad memories and thoughts. I’m OK now but it sure was something.
My upper lip (with insect bite) actually grew a bit last night. Hmm. Will keep an eye on it. More paracetamol I guess. Otherwise I’m good. Sober and clean. Grateful for another day. Have a good one all. Love from The Soester Duinen.
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Day 30/420 pills/booze
Another early start with the smallest member of he family 
Away for a long weekend with good friends today. Time outdoors, no booze pressure, no pills in my overnight bag, not even an antihistamine sleeping tablet which I’ve come to rely on somewhat to help sleep now off the benzos. All feels very positive. Wishing all peace this weekend 
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My ex was very thin when she was younger and developed a complex because of things that were said to her. It’s almost as if society feels like it’s “okay” to tease thin people because… Well… They’re thin! Things are good for them anyway. 
I’m sorry you had to deal with that. It’s unfortunate that anyone thinks it’s okay to mock someone else because of how they look.
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That is a beautiful picture. I love it.
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You had a painful and uncomfortable experience and it is understandable that you feel shaken up by it. I think deep down you know that those jerks being jerks says more about them than it does about you, but that doesn’t make it any less tough.
Finding a balance between healthy self image and a healthy body/ mind is a really hard thing to navigate.
You are not broken. You are a human being! We all deserve peace and compassion. Know that you have friends here holding that for you until you can find it for yourself 
In my experience the best thing to do is not make decisions when I’m upset. The problem will likely still be there when I feel more able to deal with it. If not, bonus 
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257 days
Received my official offer letter last night, starting my new job a week Monday, I can breathe again, knowing I can pay my bills and help my son through his last year of uni, the timing is perfect. I had used all my savings to keep a roof over my head, so a huge weight has been lifted.
Off for a river swim soon that will wake me up. Tonight I am out 80/90’s reunion, djs music etc. I am the happy designated driver, looking forward to see some faces from the past and of course the music, be refreshing not to be the liveliest person in the room making a complete idiot of herself.
Have a strong sober day 
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Checking in on day 4 , tired legs today , started walking with a friend yesterday to keep my mind active , 9 miles and soaked wet but I was sober . Still at the tired stage but I know it will pass so just going with it , happy sober Friday all 
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Checking in, day 309 no alcohol, day 59 no smoke. I’m pretty anxious about tomorrow. It will be my father’s birthday so I’ll speak with my parents. I’m afraid to see how hurt or broken they are and I’m anxious about being hurt by their coldness and denial that they use to protect themselves.
But also I’m getting better at being all right on my own. Haven’t heard from my best friend in 1,5 months. I know that we will get in contact again eventually, and though I miss her, it’s also liberating to experience that I don’t depend on my feelings that much, I don’t have to fight myself not to react on them. I can lose a lot without losing myself.
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Checking in sober on another mostly sleepless night - that makes three in a row, which happens often enough that I know what to expect. But it still sucks. I have tried to just rest as much as I can and might have snoozed a couple times, but is 4:00 and I’m ready to get up. I start hearing auditory hallucinations without sleep this long and they can be disconcerting, music in the sound of fans or whirring of appliances, dishwasher especially, but then it morphs into voices and that is not cool! I’ll try to take a nap later. Insomnia is especially hard for me with a partner who tosses and turns and a dog who insists on being under the covers and readjusts her position throughout the night. So if there’s any chance I can slip into slumber inevitably someone shuffles and I’m torn back awake, since sleep is so light at this stage. Sometimes I sleep in the basement, but it’s just a loveseat and not very comfy. I’ve been here before and I’ll get through it. It reminds me of withdrawals off alcohol, which really are not fun memories. It’s possibly been due to my efforts to put a routine in place and implement better sleep hygiene, rather than just sleep when I’m tired and follow my night owl tendencies, which means sleeping in, etc. Sometimes it has to get worse before it gets better, right? At least my attitude is sort of okay, I’m not letting it get me down.
Thanks for listening. Hope you all have a strong sober day, amigos. 
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Thank you 
and well done on your first week
Hey all, checking in on day 453. I hope everyone has a good one!
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Congrats on day 300!!
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Day 455 clean and sober today. I hope everyone has a great day, love you guys! 
So…. We had a lightning storm here last night and I just saw these pics that a photographer posted and thought I’d share. This is in Oceanside, Ca at the harbor.
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…… just sitting outside the office, talking to you guys and gals.