586 days of sobriety. Boss was pleased with my work today, and he was happy when I talked about my struggles and he has been so good at supporting me in a way that I need. Our work place is really flexible and there is a lot of trust in our group that everyone can do things on their own pace. While that is good for me in the way that I have difficulties waking up early in the morning, i have difficulties to get started and to hold my own deadlines. I told my boss that I need him to lead me and give me external pressure, which has helped quite a bit - stress of dissappointment is greater than my stupid brain. Still difficult, but a few percent easier.
Thoght that I was gonna only be tired and have a sore arm because of vaccine. i was wrong, fever is rising now anyyyyways
Life is crazy eh? Like, just everything about it. I’m sorry ur struggling abit today Matt I have been in weird up n down moods lately too. I’ve been trying to sort of just observe my emotions when they pop up. Not judging them or trying to fix them but seeing what I can learn from them. I get soo caught up in my negative emotions and sometimes get “stuck” and I find literally stopping and breathing and doing a gratitude list is so helpful. Hope ur day improves
Thank you for checking in. Last couple days have been hard. I just finished my therapy appointment and am feeling a little better. I guess the “pink cloud” phase of recovery is over.
I’m feeling overwhelmed with the move, recovery, and just life in general. I just need to find a way to get through this sober. I can’t numb everything with alcohol and I don’t feel the euphoria of recovery anymore. I can get through this but it will be hard.
Day 286 of no self harm. Just wanted to update that I managed to get through last night without any relapse. I’ll check in at the end of the day as usual. I’m so proud of all of you
I haven’t told you but I’ve learned about acceptance from reading your posts. I appreciate that. Like you, I struggle at times with negative emotions; also you’ve shared about being a comfort eater and that certainly describes me too. I think you’re right that being kind and stopping to breathe, for perspective, is helpful.
Awe Matt this made me smile thank u! Emotions are a tough one for me too. I have always done something to try and fix my feelings, wether it be food or shopping or exercise or drugs or sex or anything. 1 other thing I found that really helps me to get out of myself and my “stinkin thinkin” is being of service to others. I will literally ask my HP… what can I do today to be of service to someone else? Getting out of myself ALWAYS helps me and improves my mood
Congrats on day 44.
Lean on us when you’re willing.
The euphoria of recovery might just come back and give you a big happy hug tomorrow. Or the next day.
One day I wouldn’t be feeling it. And then all of a sudden. Bam . It’s back. Then it leaves again. Go figure. Those dang feelings.
I’ll leave this here for whoever might want to read it.
anyyyyways
I have been in weird up n down moods lately too. I’ve been trying to sort of just observe my emotions when they pop up. Not judging them or trying to fix them but seeing what I can learn from them. I get soo caught up in my negative emotions and sometimes get “stuck” and I find literally stopping and breathing and doing a gratitude list is so helpful. Hope ur day improves 
I think you’re right that being kind and stopping to breathe, for perspective, is helpful.
. It’s back. Then it leaves again. Go figure. 
Those dang feelings.
