Thank you so much JR!
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Thank you!!! That means alot 
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Good luck on the job search! Thats tough with so much history but you have to be true with yourself
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Checking in day 44 free from weed and alcohol. So thankful i found a beginners zoom AA meeting that covers steps 1 thru 3. Its usually a big group and i havent shared yet but maybe tomorrow. Still on the search for a good sponsor…trying to be patient. This beginners meeting hooks ppl up with sponsors so i will try that. Asked last week but nothing came of it, maybe this week my plea will gain traction. Im bummed im going to miss the ladies in person meeting thursday but gotta celebrate my dads bday and fathers day. I can always jump on a zoom after. Anyways im rambling. I love you all very much and everybodys willingness to share and be supportive really helps.
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Thank you for reaching out and thank you for your positive words … it’s definitely bringing up a lot of emotions but I’m learning that’s ok … feeling is ok but also knowing when I need to ask for help . I’m glad You are seeking help also.
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I understand being nervous to share on your first meetings whether in person or zoom. One thing that was suggested for me and what I did was just simply say my name and maybe one small sentence and end it with that’s all I’m comfortable with for now… All that matters is that you’re making that part of your life is really good. There’s so many different sobriety tools out there but there is so much good that comes out of AA . Also another thing that somebody told me in AA When looking for a sponsor look at how they behave after the meeting. Look at their actions and what do or have to say ? Do you want what that person has? There is so much good literature on the AA site and I’m sure you can get the Books all kinds of places. Also there’s many more recovery programs which I’m sure you know … Thank you for your post. I hope that you have a good night
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Thanks so much, and yeah it really did honestly. I also talked in depth with my therapist about it and she gave me some pretty helpful advice that I’m gonna start trying to apply
Have a good night!
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Thanks so much 
I appreciate the support here and embracing the rough patches of growth is the next step for me to find more peace i think
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Thank you so much for the support and prayers, I appreciate everyone here and the understanding of universal hands on parenting experience & struggles. I’ll definitely always keep doing whatever I can for the kiddo and I know in the end he’s gonna be okay.
Talked it out w/ my therapist and the fact that sometimes these growth patches just take a little bit longer to see what can usually end up being something beautiful in the end and I’m here for that for sure. Thanks again and have a good evening!
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#Day 1365 
Yesterday I worked half a day and it was hard. Today it’s a whole day and I’m not looking forward to it. When back to work after being sick for a while it’s difficult to take it easy.
My boss is telling me to do so and I’m only back for 75%. But I have to work all days and mostley on my own because the whole team is sick of Covid and the boss is on holiday.
Tomorrow morning we shut down the store to give me some air but at 12 I have to run it again.
It gives me stress. Can I handle this, can my body handle this? I have to stick with the moment. Can I handle today? I guess so.
So my goal for today is to not look ahead and worry about it. Focus on today and listen to my body 
Picture of my holiday in Germany last week. We did a walk with a nice view on the city Trier. The mouse is my new walking mascotte
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I’m in a strange frame of mind. I always feel better in the middle of the night than during the day. Especially since I got some stuff accomplished today. I really should be in bed now, but I don’t feel like going.
And I know when I wake up I won’t have any enthusiasm or optimism. 
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Congrats, 60 days is awesome!
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1103
Hear, hear!!! That’s big Brian.
I’m with you. I won’t ingest any substance by any means. We don’t do that anymore. Never again. I have to stay in as I’m officially confirmed suffering from Covid-19. And I feel it too. 
. Hoping for a mild progression.
The weather is gorgeous. I should be out there. I’m not. Life is not always fair. It could be so much worse though. I could still be in active addiction. So grateful I’m not. This will pass. And I’ll be out there enjoying the 
on my 
soon enough. ODAAT it is.
Have as good a day as you all can friends. Make it sober and clean or nothing good will come of it. Love from Amsterdam. Pic is yesterday coming from the test location.
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Day 267 checking in 
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Day 2. I read this today:
The first year of recovery is scary business because you don’t know what to expect. You may worry about your health, your relationships, your finances, your job, and a host of other things. But being in recovery is about having faith that things will work out, and with faith comes courage—the courage to change, the courage to heal.
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This topic was automatically closed after reaching the maximum limit of 2500 replies. Continue discussion at Checking in daily to maintain focus #43 (Part 15).