Checking in
Confused and lost. Overwhelmed thinking about all i need to do still. But awake. Ive smiled ive laughed and Ive even been social already today. Which is goud for me.
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Still in the train. Got a regular seat after spending an hour on the floor. It was quite interesting so far. As the train is really full there are a lot of people talking, on the phone or in person. Now sitting next to some students talking about creating content of their posts. Reminded me how I was struggling 23 years ago with talking to someone over ICQ (I think thatās what it was called) and getting the first excercises via email 
and struggling printing them and how some years before we had first router with a loooooong cable through the flat and the noise it made and the time it took to load a page. How patient have I been? I must have been patient.
I am grateful to be sober.
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Hello sorry youāre feeling this way but you are definitely not alone. The past few months Iāve been in a mental hole myself. Iām starting to learn right now is that I need to learn how to except things for how they are, or how they are happening. For myself I start to read the literature from the 12 step program Iām in, for others here they have all kinds of different ways that I hope some share to maybe help you find what works for you. I have so much I need to take care of that I have neglected in my life I didnāt even know where to start. So far Iāve gotten my car goin, registration, insurance, next my license. Iāve got tax fraud issues coming my way, and a son whoās grandmother wants me out of the picture period. But I just keep on doing the right thing thatās all I can do. I believe in my heart if I just stay clean and donāt give in things will fall into place the way they are supposed to. I donāt always like the way it turns out but life isnāt always easy. Just take care of one thing at a time and donāt overwhelm yourself. Be kind to yourself most importantly. You just stay the course and keep doing the right thing everything else will follow in time. Take care 
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This here, I really needed to hear this today. Thank you 
good to see you too.
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Love ya twizz Good to see you too. Be good to you you got this
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129 days is huge congratulations 
We all sometimes just need to come here for encouragement and support. We just sometimes canāt give back of we need a hand to hold ourselves. Thatās why itās so good here because there are so many of us to lean on and hold eachother up.
Take the support 
we are here for you, we understand the struggle, we know we canāt give back all of the time.
Your doing amazing in so proud of you 
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day 189
Yesterday was my wedding anniversary.
We have flown to the north island hit up a lazy beach side town to chill, such a good vibe, eaten the best burritos of my damn life rocked out to some good live music and come home, the place had such an atmosphere i wanted to stay but i could feel the old me getting to close to wanting to sneak in a drink
So we ended up coming to relax in the hot tub instead. After alot travel it was awesome.
I feel so fortunate to be able to do things like this with life now rather than āpissing money awayā these days.
@Jftself good to see you brother!!
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Happy anniversary
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It sounds like a perfect day!
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Thatās right Travis happy for you brother. Congratulations, and happy anniversary man. Glad you left when you thought you should thatās wassup man. So happy for you man 
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Been keeping myself busy, I find myself beating myself up about my relapse. Today makes day 5. Went to Ikea to replace a lamp I broke. settling in for the evening, watching a movie. Positive vibes, positive thoughts.
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Day 330 here.
I had a bit of a mood and energy slump after dinner, and not really sure why. I had been looking forward to the food but it wasnāt as nice as I had hoped for, or maybe my appetite was a bit off. Anyway, I got my headphones on and listened to an album I really like (The Waeve) and tidied the kitchen and did the dishes. Iām feeling much better.
One of the things Iām a bit irritated by is that I had an hour less of doing nothing today with the daylight savings change!
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24 hours sober
The time change made me mixed up all day and nothing was realy satisfying today 
My lunch didnāt taste good 
I was at the pool but I was so bored and unmotivated.
Both happens max 2 a year!
Feeling depressed and tired.
I got a severe rash on a common painkiller (diclofenac).
This is the first time in 10 years, I took any real pain killer despite of some aspirin (have lower back problems since weeks) and then something like that!!!
My skin is looking like a strong neurodermatitis attack. I even need cortison ointment.
Due to that and my mental lability, I would like to talk to my doctor for a sick leave tomorrow. But my nearest colleague is still on holiday and the other one was fired. So I think I will go.
Will bring head to pillow soon. Sober! This night and probably tomorrow. ODAAT.
Much love 
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Not the greatest day, had something happen this morning that infuriated me and ive struggled to shake it off for the rest of the day, im a sensitive person n felt very hurt. Im doing well with my sobriety but then some days ā¦whack!! like a ton of bricks i get this scared feeling like my addiction one day might come back and get meā¦thats the only way i can describe it, anyways tomorrrow is a new day n i hope to wake up feeling better, my love to you all 
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Checking in on day 90 
. Still my family is not doing too good, but weāll take it step after step, as we all do here. Have a sober day and night, sending energy to all those currently struggling.
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Day 5 ending after a very good span of 31 days. I keep learning from my mistakes and I hope to do better this time with the help of the Lord and with others
Lately I discovered aso that I have a compulsive behavior with Twitter
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Happy Sunday my friends. Little rain here in Chicagoland. Ill take that over snow about now.
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Happy anniversary and day 189!! Good call heading home!! And great pic!!!
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Had a slip, but here is to Day One 
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