Then do it, be sober, reach out before you go to that damn store to buy drugs, fight through it.
Right now nothing changes, you keep on relapsing and relapsing. You know what to do, again, I know it’s hard. I went through this a lot. Many did. It’s your life, you decide what to make of it.
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Do not beat yourself up. We have all been on this Rollercoaster with the addiction brain. You still want sobriety and you will get it.
Starting a new fresh day! Youve got the tools and the will and the support from this community.
Heres to you and day 1 
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Kya - i love it and it may grow on you.
Kya - name meaning …Diamond in the sky
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Congrats on the 1 year Nate!!! Thats truly amazing work. 
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I am glad you are here Julia. Thank you for being honest and transparent. We are here for you! I have been there many many times…. Today is a new day!
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Day 79 sober. Arrived to work early this morning. Pleasant drive here watching the darkness disappear as the sun rises.
It’s a beautiful new day today!
@Juli1 @Hesmyportion @Tinkerbell keep your head up and know that you have people in this community that are praying for you and believe in you.
If I didn’t keep coming to this site and finally start attending AA I would not be sober today. Somehow I always chose the drink eventually even though I had sworn it off a week or two ago. Those late single digits / early double digits always got me. Always……
Being here, AA, getting a sponsor and being honest is the only way for me.
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Good morning checking in grateful to be sober and to this app, thank you guys for sharing keep working if your struggling and congrats to those who have reached new milestones or just feel good this morning. You guys reminds me early in the morning that I am still an alcoholic and at least for the moment I have to keep my head on a swivel the whole day to not fall into my old patterns. It’s hard but you-all are my support. I drop my 2 kids off and pick them up at different schools but in that 4 mile round trip I pass 5 bars I frequented…so for the moment for my own sanity I am homebound mostly but it feels good to be Sober again today.
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Hey all, checking in on day 1,047. I hope everybody has a good one!
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I’m right there with you, 110 days for me.
I don’t have any words of wisdom, just know you aren’t alone, I feel the same way.
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I always glad, that you come back and give it a new try!
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Im sooo sorry to hear this… that is so incredibly sad 
they will be in thoights and prayers this morning
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What exactly happened leading up to the relapse? What times were there choices that you made that lead you to drink? Looking back, how did those choices actually fail to serve you? It is important that you don’t sleepwalk into another relapse. Really consciously notice what happened, what feelings you had, what choices you made. And where next time you can take a different path.
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Morning check in
Day 438
Feeling slightly rushed and irritable this morning. No real reason for it. I dont think i slept very well.
Today my plans are to do my morning recovery routine, head to the dollarstore, do some light exercise, do some cleaning, and have a nice bath with some meditation. As the week goes on, Im feeling more n more worn out. My body is just tired. So will try to rest more (something i struggle with).
I am very proud of myseld tho for last night bcuz i wanted to engage in late night snacking and that urge to eat was quite strong, but i didnt do it. I have had 3 fairly good days in a row with my eating. Will keep at it today also. Im treating my addiction to food in a similar way to my addiction to drugs. When i get a craving to eat more, i do the same thing that i do when i have a craving to use. Its hard but it seems to be working.
Hope everyone has an addiction free day!
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Thanks for reaching out, Genevieve! I will be glad to just have the blood taken and know I can no longer change it (this time ‘round). It will be what it will be, yes?
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Thanks for the encouragement, @binx. I am terrible at remembering to take vitamins, but you are so right. I should embrace the small easy things I can do to help myself. Baby steps 
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TW triggers and SH
Thank you Flo… I answered this for myself. It’s complicated to explain. Long storry short, I was dissociating yesterday. These moments are big triggers, where I feel I need a “big” feeling like alcohol floating my blood, body, mind. It was the same, when I used to selfharm in earlier days.
I think I am not in the best mood, as I missed my sports since almost 2 weeks, due to covid
Wanted to start with yoga today, but was still to weak. The bottle of wine yesterday has its part.
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Checking in sober - Day 0
Almost 24 hours
Staying sober from:
- alcohol
- toxic relationships
- eating drama
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Keep trying Julia. When you want it bad enough you’ll get it. 
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Day 
. 5 
Did insanely good workout. Weights was on max and did the best PR’s of this year. Wouldn’t be possible when using as I still did the workouts but always lowering weights after drinking. Going up and down up and down all the time. Now today no words needed, performance talks itself! Now we’re talking!
Using my night lamp and sleep supplements is helping a little bit. Managing to get around 6.5 hours of sleep, that is improvement. Sleeping about 9+ on weekends.
It’s hard week and to train like this was not the smartest thing to do…
but it was 
still will feel much better than hangovered the next day 
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156 chilling play cod
Pain not to bad today
Happy sober Thursday everyone
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