Checking in Day 479
Things are going okay today. My son went to school this morning and i got my workout out of the way. Proud of myself bcuz I almost convinced myself to not go. But i know i always feel better after a workout. It doesnt have to be perfect, just consistent. So i went and im glad i did. Alsp did my morning prayer which I really needed today.
I wrapped all of my sons bday gifts today. His birthday is coming up very soon and i needed the alone time to be able to wrap them without him knowing Im really excited this year for his bday. Hope he enjoys everything. Just wish I could bake him a cake but i dont bcuz he cant eat it (so that wouldnt be very fair at all).
What elseā¦ I worked on my fondant cupcake toppers today and did some cleaning. Got some bus tickets for tmrws appt. My son is trialing out some adapted bikes for the summer. So he is excited! Then we just wait for delivery.
Things are okay today and im grateful for that stability. Hope everyone is having an addiction free day!
435 days
Weāre doing this thing. One foot in front of the other. I have counselling today. I feel a lot less fragile this week, looking forward to having a chat and getting better.
Have a great day everyone
Checking in on day 726 alcohol free. In the last months I have really slipped with eating healthy. Despite being pretty active at the gym and on the bike, Iāve bounced back up fifteen or so pounds from my ideal weight. It frustrates me because it seems I can only be in one of two states: either always hungry or gaining weight. I canāt seem to hit the right balance. Sorry if this discussion is triggering to anyone. Just venting a bit. Hope everyone is doing well today.
@rob11 Dry drunk- I had to look this up. WOW I can understand it now. You are making some great leaps in your recovery my friend. Keep growing and learning. You are stronger than you think and can life a healthy sober fulfilling life. @JennyH I do hope that you are able to regain your energy after tomorrowās funeral. Glad you cheered yourself up by just dropping by here. Sending you comfort my friend @Brian1965uk I am glad to hear that it passed. @zzz so good to see you back. Iām so sorry that you have been struggling so hard. Do you have someone by you to look after you as you go through the withdrawals? I do hope that the worst is over. Do get some medical help if you think the symptoms get worse or hard to handle. Keep checking in here for accountability and hopefully you do have a in real life support system as well. Wishing you strength and support my friend. Congrats to starting day 1 @soberwalker ooh ā nice book (I have not read that one yet) What a fun way to educate your kids. I love it and now that the weather is warmer I think I will try this myself. Thanks!! @anon15828629 Yes ā I do agree that this community is super helpful and itās such a huge relief being around so many that understand your struggle and are going through similar urges / triumphs. Great job on day 3 ā keep up the great work. @billy85 123 days of sobriety ā nice numbers :wink Glad you and Ky are doing well. @karen kw Iām so sorry sweetheart! I hope that you are able to relax after doing some work ā have some non-caffeinated tea and possibly some mediation to help with the anxiety. I do wish this depression and pain would leave you alone. Sending relief my friend. @icebear Iām sorry that you are going through this struggle with food. Now that weather is breaking can you have more fresh fruit and veggies (link- Zero Calorie Foods: The Complete List Of Food With No Calories) Set a routine time for eating. I know itās a struggle and wish you luck with this. I know many do intermittent fasting ā maybe give that a shot only eat between 7 am and 7 pm? @bones_80 OH MAN I do hope that playing Diablo 4 will help you! Iām sorry that you are experiencing so much pain and that your visit to the hospital is not going well.
Checking in Wednesday evening
168 weed and alcohol free
583 days cigarette free
Been an interesting day (pain levels are insane but i was able to get my items on the to do list done). No major urges (the light ones come and go) - Wishing everyone a wonderful sober evening!!!
Be strong whoever and wherever you are in the world right now friendā¦ Breathe, focus on what you even want out of this life? and commit to it as long as it takes! (where thereās a will, thereās a way)
Day 2366. Didnāt feel well, so I came home from work early today and am resting. I have this wonderful purring creature on my lap, so thatās helping.
Iāve finally made the decision to add structure to my day and stay relatively consistent with a schedule. I was aware of what the benefits were, but I had to get real with myself and take initiative and I must say, this is probably the single greatest advancement in my sobriety since getting sober. Well, that and earning my driverās license.
I can legitimately say that I look forward to each task which are nothing too demanding, and as a result I find myself immensely more disciplined when it comes to eating, and Iāve virtually eliminated my cravings for processed sugar. Iām also much more inclined to get active and exercise. Yesterday I walked 5mi, biked 10mi, and finished the night off with 30min strength training session at the gym until I hit my limit - the gym which Iāve literally signed up for 4/5 times in the past year but only went once, maybe 3-4 times total over the years.
Today was light as I donate blood on Weds so I chose to relax a bit, but I still walked and sparred on my punching back this morning, made it to my CDL training, donated, studied for my upcoming CDL test for 2hrs, and ate appropriately.
My day isnāt too complex, especially considering the fact that Iām unemployed/self employed at the moment. And because of that, itās easy to just slack off until you decide you want or need something. Iāve been a heavy procrastinator for far too long, as well as impatient, and the concept of One Day At A Time became lost to me a early on in my sobriety. After nearly 3 1/2 years of sobriety I believe I finally found what was missing.
The toughest battle is not with the substances youāre trying to free yourself from, the toughest battle will always and forever be the one between you and your decisions.
A substantial part of my success has been checking in here daily. It has to do with accountability. With perseverance. With a clear goal in mind. With knowing Iām not alone because here weāre in it together and thatās not a hollow phrase. And it also has to do with my black and white BPD thinking which has its advantages at times .
The only day I missed checking in here has been the day the forum was down. Iām happy and lucky to be one of the mods here and we were in contact outside the forum that day so I still had the connection. And Iām also slowly building new connections outside this place. New relationships with people not based on drinking or drugging together, which in fact never is being truly together, under the influence we are together in isolation and thatās all that is.
Never again. The opposite of addiction is connection and weāre all together working on making better connections in our lives. Iām so incredibly grateful you are all here with me. Iām on a journey of Discovery but Iām not alone. Iāve been working hard, and now Iām truly beginning to see the benefits and reap the rewards from that work. I love my job for the first time in my life, at 57. I finally get to share the social me, the real me, in my work, in the rest of my life, right here with you. That makes me happy.
Being sober and clean is a gift that keeps giving just as long as we keep putting in the work to make it work. One day at a time. Each in our own ways we can make this happen. Together. Love this place and you all so much.
Hoping for a quiet day. My wife is going away with work. That used to trigger terrible off my head behaviour. It doesnāt anymore. Iāll have a restful couple of days with my dog - sheāll enjoy being allowed to sleep on the bed - and just keep on being sober. (Itās 06:17, the birds are singing outside, and I really love the sound and smell, and warmth of a beautiful summer day. )
Congratulations, Menno!
It is time for confetti, I think!!
Big huge congrats and admiration for all you have accomplished!
Big huge thanks for all you have given and shared with all of us!
Celebrate!
Today i could eat. I think i may have overdone it, but i will deal with that mental load another time. Today Iām happy i could eat. I took the kids to the park today and we flew kites, walked by the water and played on the playground.
I made a small bonfire and enjoyed the smell and sight of the wood burning down. I figuratively threw some negative Thoughts and emotions in the fire with the wood and watched it burn away. It was therapeutic.
Now itās almost 130am and i am hoping to get some sleep before my long day at work tomorrow. Feeling a bit overfull and mind over thinking.
Hereās to another day sober
Have a great night (or day) friends
Im really excited this year for his bday. Hope he enjoys everything. Just wish I could bake him a cake but i dont bcuz he cant eat it (so that wouldnt be very fair at all).
chilling back at home been in hospital again not well at all 
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