@mesober Hey love welcome to day 2. Do you know what caused you to slip? 270 days is awesome - take what you’ve learned and build on it. Hold onto the feeling of not wanting to repeat this cycle. You are stronger than your addiction and can live a healthy happy sober life - sending you strength my friend. @jjcarson92 so delighted for all the progress you are making and the healthy active lifestyle you are leading. YEAH to you. @noshame – great job of getting over the 2-week hump – you are doing awesome. Sending good vibes for you to complete your goal of getting a license in the next 6 months @CJP so glad you enjoyed the concert and did so sober!!! Yeah to having a no hangover Sunday @residentevil Congrats on getting back on track and your 30 days!!! @J_lo_ste wow!! Thanks for sharing. How beautiful and touching to read. I am glad that you had such a blessed sober time with your dad before his passing. So very proud he must have been of you to have done what he did for you. Yeah to your 21 years !!!
Checking in on Sunday afternoon – Happy Fathers Day to all the fathers / grandfathers
Slept a bit better but still feel like i could sleep for days. I am super happy that my basil plant was so full today (gave away a lot of it to my mom) Will finally get around to planting my other herbs this week (kinda of been slacking this year). I am not at my best physically but emotionally and mentally i am over the moon. So excited for another sober day! Be your best selves today - we are more than our addictions / ailments - have a wonderful SUNDAY - sending much love
Thank you yes, since I was sober and able to calm down we were able to talk through things and we each apologized because we had each done something to apologize for. It’s like… oh, so this is how adults can get through and process an argument! nobody has to drink and the world isn’t ending.
Not feeling that great. Lately I’m having (possibly) heavily derealisation episodes, where I even don’t realise I have them and… I feel so disconnected to world and people here. Like I’m in another world.
Sometimes I get flashbacks. And this day was one of the days when I had them. I miss my close friend who died because of his drug addiction. It’s already half year, but I still can’t accept he’s… Not here physically alive anymore. I wish I was with him right now.
As well I’m worried about my mental health. I feel again down a lot and inside of me is some bomb, which will explode and… With it will come some very bad times, aka relapses etc. I don’t know what to do with it, so I just say my feelings and thoughts to you, my therapist and my boyfriend. It’s a little bit helping. At least something.
And yeah. Tommorow I’m going to school but already with my class… I really want to be with the other class I was this week. I miss them already. They’re fine people.
Also if anyone is interested in that pigeon I mentioned yesterday. He somewhere dropped in another place, so I guess someone else putted him in a place to rest in peace. Or I hope so, I really don’t want to think of that someone putted him in garbage. Too cruel for me.
Oh love im so sorry that you are experiencing these episodes. Grateful that you are able to express them to your boyfriend, your therapist and here. Im sure you miss your friend (time travels differently for everyone so dont focus on how its been 1/2 a year - your heart still aches and that is allowed). Please dont talk about joining your friend. Your friend is with you in spirit and we need you here living your best life.
I know depression and disassociative episodes can be severe and hopefully your therapist can help you manage these better.
We love you and want to see you get better. Thank you for the update on the pigeon- i do also choose to believe its in a better peaceful place.
Draw and write to get your feelings out and have them lose their power over you.
Sorry you have to go back to the old class - just keep in mind that the classes are almost over and you will be free from these people soon.
Much love my friend
Quick check in with 446 days
Had a lovely weekend with the family. Back to work today. It’s cold, I miss the sun and the beach haha.
Have a good one friends
@BrOKenWolf sorry to hear about the injury, sending healing vibes @SoberWalker I hope once you’re there the anxiety will lessen and you can enjoy the concert and atmosphere 🩵 @MeSober welcome back @Deelzebub sorry you’ve been struggling, glad the medication helps but I feel you re the side effects. Pretty flowers, and Orchids are beautiful @Cjp congrats on thriving at your first sober concert @zzz congrats on double digits @residentevil congrats on 30 days @nastya_is_fighting sending you strength I’m glad you’re here and talking about your feelings, and with your therapist and boyfriend too, slowly that awful feeling inside will get smaller, I hope anyway 🩵 school is soon to be over for you and I hope the time passes quickly and your regular class aren’t such awful humans to you until then
1042 days no alcohol.
507 days no cocaine.
22 days no vape.
2 days no binge-eating.
Not long been home from my brother’s, it was such a nice visit, my dad seemed to like his gifts, I always feel bad for not knowing what to get him and whether he really thinks the gifts aren’t much. My brother cooked for us all so I ate a real food meal, which was really nice and he said it was healthy so I have to accept it. After a really long time trying, my SIL is pregnant, they paid for a private scan, their official 12 week scan is on my bday, July 4th, but I’m so happy for them, my heart is so full. I’m not going to dwell on the fact that I wasn’t part of the convos, instead I was playing with my niece, and we were having a great time she’s so funny, I hope that nothing ever dampens her spirit.
Other than that, I did my morning routine, my walk, meditations, and showered.
I’m glad I have tomorrow to decompress. Have some things in my calendar for this week that I am anxious and nervous about, but not focusing on that until the days arrive, each in their own time, one day at a time.
There seems to be a lot of chaos going on in the world. I almost feel as if I am in the eye of a hurricane… and I am grateful for the serenity I feel in my life. When we finally find serenity it isnt that our lives are all peaceful and shit, serenity is when we can find peace in the chaos. I have that, just for today.
I took my kiddo to a big AA rally this weekend and she loved it, she didnt want to leave. We hit a few meetings together including an ala-non meeting which was the first i had been to. When we were driving home she was saying how much she loves the community and how it felt so good to be able to relate to things people were saying, she didnt feel alone. I knew exactly what she meant, and I am so grateful she gets that same sense of identity that I do from meetings. I have hope that I will be able to get her to some ala-non meetings, in person, in the near future. She could use some support.
It must be a sign of old age!
yes, since I was sober and able to calm down we were able to talk through things and we each apologized because we had each done something to apologize for. It’s like… oh, so this is how adults can get through and process an argument! 
I don’t know what to do with it, so I just say my feelings and thoughts to you, my therapist and my boyfriend. It’s a little bit helping. At least something.
I miss them already. They’re fine people.
🩵 school is soon to be over for you and I hope the time passes quickly and your regular class aren’t such awful humans to you until then 
she’s so funny, I hope that nothing ever dampens her spirit.
