Checking in… 12 minutes left in my work day. Been burnt out this afternoon, and scrolling through threads on here for a little while. Oops… 
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I thought of you when I spotted it 
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@noshame 5 days is awesome- 5 months AF you are seriously kicking ass. Wishing you luck with the apartment - hope she calls back asap
@mx_elle 7 days no weed! Well done with your 1 week milestone
Go on and flex those sober muscles you two 
@juli1 so grateful that you chose you and stayed sober. We are here for you and have your back!
@ amy30 I am so very sorry for your loss. We are here if you need to talk out your feelings in order to process the situation. 
@jennyh wow that’s huge! Grateful you were able to enjoy a lovely evening stroll. Yeah to 1/2 day tomorrow - ENJOY!
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@JennyH those car journeys do sound intense, I hope you got the rest you needed and that your CFS flare is calming down 
🩵
@Tragicfarinelli yeah I’m in the UK, I got Krispy Kremes the following night 
I’ve only just heard about the app, I think it’s such a good idea 
@Wakikki yes, if the Gastro team get you to do something called a Barium Swallow, they will see clearly if there is anything wrong thats causing any blockages. The top of my cabinet is full of plants now, it makes me laugh when I look at them all, I’ve never had so many! 
@Just_Laura my gosh, bless your daughter’s heart, I’m terrified of being trapped, back in the day when there weren’t mobile phones, panic and screaming were the only options! Glad she knew she could call you, and I’m extra glad you made it home and enjoyed your weekend 
@lorelai congrats on 4+ years AF 
and 1+ years SHF sorry about the Covid I hope youre not experiencing any lingering effects. 🩵
@Scorpn belated congrats on your year 
proud of you 🩵
@Marlowe belated congrats on double digits
@mx_elle congrats on 1902 and 7 sending strength 🩵
@Pattycake belated congrats on 90 days
@Phone_Home welcome belated congrats on your week
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@Chuckie22 belated congrats on double digits eating more and craving sugar are both very normal in early sobriety.
@Nunu1 welcome back belated congrats on 6 months
@KarenKW sending strength 🩵
@Juli1 congrats on 40 days
@SoberGuyUSA congrats on 1900+ days
@Hisharleyquinn1318 don’t do it, it’s not worth it. Sending strength 🩵
@MyLife21 congrats on double digits
@Barber508 congrats on your month
@Noshame congrats on passing your driving classes and tests 
good luck with your application 
@zzz congrats on 2 weeks
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@Brl81 congrats on 80 days
@SelfLove_42 congrats on 70 days
@Starlight14 congrats on your reassuring results, I’m sure the shots and meds will soon pick your deficient levels up 🩵
@JuliaLuna I hope it goes well with the therapist 🩵
@Amy30 I’m so sorry for your sudden loss 
1158 days no alcohol.
623 days no cocaine.
138 days no vape.
Tuesday I felt really depressed. Spent a lot of time scrolling searching for gifts for my dad’s wife’s birthday this coming Sunday, but I found nothing. She is really hard to buy for, and they’ve been together a long time so I ran out of original ideas years ago. (I’ve now got her a fancy candle and some hand cream).
Tuesday I attended an online course called ‘Food and Mood’, and it was lead by an actual Dietician, so it was very interesting, I learned a lot about how I should be eating, and little changes I could start to make to work towards that. I do hope I can start therapy asap though, because I’m currrently still stuck in the restrict/binge cycle of doom.
Yesterday, I didn’t felt as depressed as Tuesday, I received my delivery of plant saucers so the new plants are all in their new positions around the flat, with most of them being grouped together on the top of my high cabinet, looking like a whole jungle up there!
I attended another online course yesterday afternoon, which was part 2 of ‘leaving loneliness behind’. It was a nice course.
I wasnt able to get out for any walks yesterday.
Today I’ve felt extra depressed, and even though I was wide awake from 8:30am, I coukdnt drag myself out of bed until midday. Then I did my morning routine, spent time with the cats, managed to do my lake walk, and have spent the evening catching up here, which always feels good.
Tomorrow first thing, I have my Testosterone, Flu, and Covid shots.
🩵
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Checking in on day 109, feeling stressed over finances, I really did some damage during my addiction. Slowly figuring it out though.
Sending strength and serenity to all 
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What a shock. I am sorry to hear and send my condolences to you.
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Take care, friend, especially after all those shots at once. You will want to take it very easy afterward.
I am sorry you’re stuck in that cycle of doom as you call it, but it gives me hope that you’ve had access to so many different services and you are utilizing them. They won’t all be helpful all of the time but you are giving it your best go and I am proud of you!
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Sorry to hear this Amy, sending positive vibes and well wishes 
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Hi Cam.
Sorry to hear that you have had a down week, take it slow, take care of yourself, try and do a few things you enjoy over the weekend and indulge yourself a bit.
Here of you need an 
.
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Day 122. Worked today for a few hours. Now to figure out what time guests are coming over and get things ready. Dinner with my bestie and her family. Keeping myself busy so I don’t fail.
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Sober day 7.
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Congratulations on ur week of sobriety!!
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@JazzyS thank you so much dear friend. Yes. You know. I have to overcome negative thinking. And every fall hurts me more and more. 
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Thank you so much to everyone’s thoughts and well-wishes during this difficult time.
I posted a long ramble that makes no sense in the lounge, but wanted to thank you guys for being here. This community helped me get sober. You guys truly are amazing human beings. It doesn’t matter where you are in your recovery journey, you’re doing it. You’re making that decision each and every day to live free of addictions. That’s amazing.
I’m gonna try and sleep. The next few days are gonna be difficult. But it’s comforting knowing I can come here and pen my thoughts. So thank you.
I won’t drink. No matter what. My family, as fucked up as they are, need me. Well… kinda. I’m sure they’ll be fine without me. Most of them. My mom needs me. Maybe not. I don’t know if anyone actually needs me. Need is a strong word.
Either way. I need me to stay sober right now. I’ve already lived through intense beaurocratic stress shit, CPTSD stress and flashbacks, my birthday, and moving next door to my dad without drinking. I need to feel whatever it is I’m feeling without numbing it and without hangovers.
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Thank you…
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