Hello,
Yes thank you for the support
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Day 679.
Always feel so stupid saying how I feel, normally keep it to myself.
Past few weeks I just feel like I need to cry but I keep holding it back.
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I cry lots. While in the past I almost never did. Itās sort of a staple of my recovery/discovery. And Iām happy to say how I feel, especially when it goes beyond just describing the anxiety that overruled all other feelings for years and years. For me (re)connecting with my feelings is a huge part of living my life without mind altering substances. Hugs to you.
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Yesterday had some tough and saddening moments to deal with but with love and support from others, I was able to bear through it, cry it out, pray, and remain sober. ODAAT 
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213 days sober
I was looking forward to our normal Sunday morning group today but unfortunately it had to be canceled. I was feeling bummed about it but then ended up with a lot of free time. Did some shopping at the bazaar and cooked a nice dinner.
I had my friend over for dinner and I told her Iāve been sleeping very badly and that I wake up so anxious I canāt get to sleep. And in the day my focus is a bit bad. It was good to talk to her and just share whatās been on my mind and be honest about whatās been bothering me. Iām so used to keeping these things, these thoughts internalized where they are hidden and Iām āprotectedā. It feels good to have a friend who trust to share these things with and know itās safe. I feel more free to tell my fears, problems and anxieties to someone than before when Iād keep them hidden like a shameful thing.
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7y10m18d
I did my consulting work yesterday but not for as long as I had planned. I ran into a snag, a problem with the foundation that was built, and I canāt sign off on this work that my client has been doing in his backyard without a permit. Not a great feeling but a blessing in disguise, I got out for a walk yesterday and had some downtime.
Really thinking a lot about how things can go either way on Tuesday and each scenario is so different for our country. Iām little nervous, I guess, that our election is only 2 days away. I will be glad when it is all over!
Iām going to my womenās meeting in the park today and meeting with my sponsee this afternoon. then grocery shopping to have enough in our fridge to start the week off. I also have to clean the fish tank which is starting to turn green, lol.
Have a great sober day everyone.
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I feel the same in a lot of ways. Itās very difficult and things feel very same-y and like Iām just passing time a bit aimlessly. Drinking didnāt help with that but maybe it masked it and now maybe we are having to confront these things in our lives. I think I also need to make a plan. Iām sure you will get there but it will take time 
. Youre doing really well, keep those sober days coming & hopefully it gets easier!
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Days
755 substance free
493 self-harm free
6 smoke free
Trying to be happy and help the kids set up a birthday dinner. I am really trying to focus my happy energy towards them. They deserve happiness. Love and affection. Peace and stability. They deserve the whole world. And i am going to do everything in my power to make that happen for them.
I cant think of me or what i want. I have to focus. I dont know how to do this. Even though ive done it beforeā¦ it never gets any easierā¦
I just want my kids to be happy
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Checking In - I have a date tonight! Definitely some nerves, but I was open about that I donāt drink and they were so receptive!
Plus I can drive, which makes thing way simpler. Anyways looking forward to just some connection 
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Day 3
I think this is the first time checking in like this. Day 3 has started with a headache and hunger lol. I have not had any cravings today which the weekend are always hard espically with football season. My husband has been amazing and is fine that we stay home for the game ( we normally go to a bar and there are free shots given on touchdowns.) Even though i said it would be fine hes like nah i dont want to go. Hes so good. Thats my day 3 now to go find something to eat.
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Day 10 check in. Double digits again. Great day today (albeit bordering on doing too muchā¦) with gym, running, gardening, DIY and weekend jobs around the house. Sunday lunch without wine. Feeling well prepared for the week to come
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Congratulations on the double digits James!
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Day 1100
So itās a little late but after everything that has been going on I decided to book a last minute trip to Portugal with my wife and our youngest 2 children (older 2 couldnāt get time off work).
Whilst I was away I celebrated my 3 years sober.
Had a lovely relaxing time and now Iām ready to smash my recovery into the next gear. Amp up the non contact training and hit my peak physical condition.
Hope you all have a happy healthy day!
Sending strength and love to you all!
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Huge congratulations on your 3 years sober @BrOKenWolf and a very happy holiday to you and your lovely family 
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I do love the walk across the bayā¦always makes me feel brighter 
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Congratulations!! Beautiful family!
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Whoo hoo, huge congrats on 3 years, thatās amazing 
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Checking in. Still sick. I did manage to get out and do a few things over the weekend. Also took cold meds and laid on the couch watching football a lot. Going to bed early and back to work tomorrow. Hopefully im feeling better. Today i went to one of my favorite places - a local alpaca farm. They are such sweet animals and it always makes me happy when i visit them.
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Day 994
Good evening friends! Busy day all around for me today. Work, 3 loads of laundry, bath for my son, and tidying up. Havent stopped since i got home.
Im feeling a bit more positive about things, thanks to my HP. Im fighting off the urge to be anxious or worried about things that are happening in my life at the moment. Relying on my HP helps a ton!
I had a chance to do a quick meditation today and boy did i miss that quiet time. It was only like 5 min but it was a nice reintroduction to meditation. I think im going to get back on Insight Timer this week and check out a few others.
Also going to get back into my exercise this week. My son is home mon, wed, and fri and so i wont be able to hit the ārealā gym, but i WILL get my ass up at 555 and hit the gym in my building for an hour. No excuses! Alarm is already set lol
Have a fantastic day/evening everyone! Much love to u all!!!
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