Please be safe. It might be a good idea anyway to identify what topics and problems you are struggling with on the day to day and to start looking at what other external support you can build. A community around you that understands your needs is going to make you feel seen. Sometimes friends are not in our headspace and that doesn’t mean you don’t love them or they don’t love you, it’s just natural that they might not understand your complexities or needs. Try and find your people where you can and build some safe foundations around you.
Make it your effort to find a tribe my friend. We can’t always rely on those around us, so we have to find them. To be seen and heard is to accept ourselves. I’m here if you ever need help. Please be safe, you deserve love and peace. Don’t forget your worth.
Congratulations on your two years and I think seven months self harm free. That is very significant. I’m proud of you.
That was very mature and self preserving of you to think of the safety plan for your parents. You were trying to protect yourself. I wish you could get rid of the razors at least without hurting yourself. I’m guessing the medicine is medicine that you need.
Can your therapist talk to your parents and tell them how important it is that they follow the safety plan? I’m sorry everything so hard Megan I hope with my heart of hearts that one of these days your life is going to be easier for you. I think that like @Tragicfarinelli says, if you are able to surround yourself with people who make you feel safe, it will help you so much. I hope that it will come to be. We are here for you
Again I’m glad you’re posting.
I think if it was an emergency situation that your friends or your parents wouldn’t mind you waking them up at 3 o’clock in the morning. They would want you to wake them up
I think oftentimes others don’t realize the seriousness of what’s going on.
I mean in theory my therapist could but I don’t know that it would do much good. my mom would take offense that my therapist doesn’t approve of her parenting choices and my dad would just do or not do whatever my mom told him
I wish you could report your parents to child protective services. They are not providing you a safe environment.
I don’t know if your age puts you out of the reach of that or not. Megan
You are cared for by many who want you to keep yourself safe and are here to help you.
even if I was young enou for CPS to be involved I’ve had many run ins with them and they don’t take me seriously either. there’s no physical abuse so as far as they’re concerned it’s fine
Great turnout last night at the Halloween event. Over 200 kids (not including the rest of the family) visited my school so im very optimistic that I will be getting some new students. Even if I don’t the important part is that they had a good time! Now I just got to clean up the giant mess haha.
335 days
Good day. Gym in the a.m, easy rounds in. Then out for lunch with the wife.
At work tonight has been a hectic start, only just had some dinner at 1030pm. It being Fri theres a good chance I’ll continue.
@MrFantastik I never heard of Descendants before but a quick image check told me the costumes would be magnificent. If I was a teen, I’d go for them too. Great choice @Frank68 Happy cleaning Your Halloween event sounds like a great success! @Tragicfarinelli You’ll get through this. When I am in this hormonal funk the whole world sucks. But also my whole mental and emotional outlook sucks. Sometimes in meditation I will hear what my brain is comming up with and it is utter crap. Either I start internal fights with someone, or spiral into worries about anything, or get into the self-pity routine, or self-hate… On and on it goes. And of course my brain will latch onto something, anything that has a kernel of thruth in it and then spin it out of proportion into a major drama. Loads of peace and letting go, and I hope you get to feel better soon @Mno Have as good of a memorial service as can @Joyce19 Great job on stacking those early days Sometimes it’s one breath at a time, one moment at a time. Whatever you need. I would also recommend online meetings with a recovery community of your choice. Sometimes just listening in helps. @JazzyS Sorry to hear the pain is making your life difficult. Also very glad to hear you enjoyed Halloween. Really liked your costume and makeup @Philipwithonel So good to hear you were able to recognise your feelings and act in a skillful way. Sounds like you are working sobriety @GOKU2019 Hope you get to be pain free and feel better soon. @scaredsmol Anxiety is a bitch. Especially in early recovery it can hit you hard. I would reccomend online meetings of a kind that you feel comfortable with. Sometimes just listetnint in helps me a lot. @MNfast Congrats on your healing journey taking you to such a great place! To health!
Today is a public holliday around here - All soul’s day. The Halloween slumber party is over, the guests are gone.
I’m going for a chill day, reading, tv, games. Will have lunch with my ex, visit my mum and give her a very early Christmas present. Maybe a bike ride later, some yoga, RD in the evening.
Today’s picture is a stained glass window from the 15th century I recently saw in an exhibition of Silesian art from the middle ages in Wrocław.
Checking in this morning feeling optimistic about today and gravitating towards everything positive. Last night was met with its difficulties but I’m still sober and on to another sober 24 and that’s enough for me. ODAAAT
Checking in. Life feels surprisingly good. I don’t have any cravings, and I don’t feel depressed now, I’m not in downward spiral with my fear, shame and guilt… And it started snowing. I love winters with lots of snow. I hope you all have a great day/evening/night! Luv ya All!
Day 352. Almost 9 months at work. My new wheel will be here today, well hopefully…its out for delivery but requires a signature, nobody is home to sign for it. I left a note, i hope it will work. But if not, then ill get it tomorrow or something lol. But im having a good day regardless. Much love
Megan 
Your Halloween event sounds like a great success!
Sometimes it’s one breath at a time, one moment at a time. Whatever you need. I would also recommend online meetings with a recovery community of your choice. Sometimes just listening in helps.
