Checking in daily to maintain focus #72

Beautiful little birds! Love the coloring on them. Thanks for sharing. It sounds like you have a good hobby!

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They are very sweet :star_struck:

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I am about to find a video of them I want to hear what noise they make. Have heard of Birdnote Daily?

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It will change Aga. Hopefully soon. Nothing stays the same, and if it does, then we move. Internally, externally or imperceptibly. Iā€™m always impressed by your resolve and stability.

Love and peace :v:t2:

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Checking in on day
582 no alcohol
90 no form of weed
222 nicotine free

90 days no weed (3 months)
I havenā€™t been in triple didgets no weed in like 2 years. Not only that but all 3 of my biggest addictions in triple didgets will be a first.

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Hello

I think this is day 3. I think on Monday i felt sick and stayed in bed, and havent left the house since. I work friday-sunday.
Ive been functioning drinking about 4 drinks per night to fall asleep. Usually about 5 dollars a night. Im miserable and not reliable as a person or friend. Idk if im actually sick or not but i physically feel unwell all the time even just from never stretching. Just hate everything and everyone lately and im just tired.

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@laner My goodness -21??? We had one year where I remember temps that low and that was with with chill and I thought I almost died. So grateful that you do have ways to keep you warm :pray:t4:
@mno oh I hate when that happens. Hope you are making it through the day without much effort. Only a few more hours to go :pray:t4:
@Just_Laura I did sleep well ā€¦best sleep in a very long time. I downloaded the app but not sure how to read it :joy::joy:. Just gives me a daily number but no comparison or standard lineā€¦maybe I need a different app? Good to know that itā€™s rising for a bit :hugs: what a beautiful card and message :heavy_heart_exclamation:
@SoberWalker oh I do hope itā€™s fully healed :pray:t4:. So glad that plaster is finally off. :clap:t4:

Some days are like that. These days I just list the basics (things I take for granted) like clean water, fresh air, clothing etcā€¦the practice of gratitude starts to take over almost naturally and helps me calm the chaotic part of my day ā€¦ weird but it works. Breathe Fionaā€¦this time of year is hard enough and we need to practice extra self care and self forgiveness :hugs:
@seb awesome sauce my friend!! Love it - 10 months and kicking ass :muscle:t4:ā€¦ keep fighting the good fight Sebastian
@acromouse I just want to reach out and hug you. This is the worst feeling and it can take over if you let it. I know itā€™s super difficult and the last thing you want to do when you are feeling/ experiencing thisā€¦BUT- reach out for positive thoughts, laughter - something to up lift the mood and change the outlook. It will get easier my friend. Have faith and I do hope your day gets better too :people_hugging::people_hugging:
@Noshame those are some amazing numbers! Congratulations my friendā€¦ looking forward to celebrating your triple digits of no weed with you shortly :pray:t4:ā€¦you are doing great :muscle:t4:
@Minatasha welcome back and great work on your sober journeyā€¦each day is a win :clap:t4::clap:t4: Iā€™m sorry you arenā€™t feeling so well. This could be the alcohol or the time of year or? If it lingers, please do go to a doctor. Drinking does make us miserable and sick. The withdrawal leave us feeling edgy and angry. This all will pass as you detox and acclimate to life without alcohol. Take it ODAAT :pray:t4: :muscle:t4:

Checking in on Thursday morning
Enjoying a cup of hot coffee while I catch up here. Had a wonderful night of sleep. Feeling ok ish and Iā€™ll take it ā€¦any sign of improvement is a wonderful sign :wink:
Woke up to many beautiful birthday wishes that warmed my heart. Thank you all! Really felt the love :people_hugging:

A day of self care and a day just for meā€¦gonna play it by ear :smiling_face:

Wishing everyone a wonderful addiction free day - sending you all so much love :heart::heart:

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252 days sober


Had a cold but beautiful morning walk. This is always my favorite part of the day whether Iā€™m walking, snow shoeing or hiking just being outside and in the mountains makes me feel at peace. It helps settle my chaotic thoughts. While I walk I can feel the heaviness and tension ease. Itā€™s like a void of darkness lifts and I feel a lightness. I hope that some day this feeling will last. Somedays it passes and the anxiety builds back up once Iā€™m home and need to be still. Other times it lingers throughout the day and I feel hopeful that the anxiety wonā€™t return. Either way it helps me cope and gives me what I need to feel healthy and to stay sober.

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Iā€™m pretty used to it and am definitely thankful for my house having proper heating now. A few years back I could see my breath inside and itā€™d snow in my kitchen when I cooked. Now itā€™s pretty cozy and only have ice on my windowsā€¦biggest compaint is the outside toilet in the winter! Just run in and out. :joy:

Hope wherever you are that youā€™re warm and toasty!

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Good morning. Thinking of you. I care and miss your posts.
IMG_2969

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Checking in 289 days. Wonderful rainy morning. Crawled back in bed and am with all of you this morning. I have enjoyed all your posts. I AM HAPPY.
My sponsor told me at our meeting she hardly ever saw me smile 8 months ago. Now I am smiling most of the time. Sobriety has been the best time ever for me. I was so very miserable every day for most of the past 5 years. Ok I have shit to do. I am getting up and face the day. I vow I will not let my Mr. Bring me down today. Stay sober my lovely friends.

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Checking in! :wave:t2:
Feeling a bit stressed this afternoon. A colleague just texted me to ask whether I was going to the X-mĆ”s lunch at my work next week, if ā€œshe should add me to the listā€. Iā€™m an extremely anti-social, and absolutely hate going to these type of events. Add to this that Iā€™ve stopped sipping on poison, and would like to keep it that way (even though I donā€™t feel at risk), so I said to her thank you but that I wonā€™t be going. You asked me, I gave an honest answer! End of story!
Now here comes the ā€œbut why??, weā€™re all going BSā€ and ā€œitā€™s informal bla blaā€ bombing. I havenā€™t replied so far, and donā€™t think I will. My boss will also be pissed off if I donā€™t go. Itā€™s funny how something so trivial, where I should be free to chose, is stressing me out so much! :unamused:
Other than that I woke up at 5:00 am this morning with severe pain (itā€™s that time of the month), and couldnā€™t fall back to sleep because the effin pills were not working at all. I got up angry (and in pain) at 7:00 am. Probably thatā€™s why Iā€™m not in the best mood in generalā€¦
Tomorrow will be a better day! :sweat_smile: (at least pain wise speaking, my Xmas lunch dilemma will still be there :roll_eyes:)

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I would say this and any negative, numb or hallow feelings are so very normal in early days. And hell even sometimes this crops up after years of sobriety, for one reason or another or sometimes for what seems like no reason at all. But in the early days feelings like this can be SO STRONG and LOOMING, and it may leave you feeling like something is wrong with you or even temp you lean back on an old crutch to sooth the shitty, listless feeling. After all, didnt we always have a crutch or little helper to sooth us when we felt somewhat off or downright shitty?

Its a dicomfort that comes from allowing the feelings in. And when we no longer numb it or shoo it away, its just there and we have to face it or go through itā€¦so much of sobriety is getting used to and working through feelings of discomfort. Alls to say, very very normal. Maybe its something that requires you to dive deeper (at some point i am not saying right now), or maybe it is something you just need to move through. These days will get easier to manage because youā€™ll grow in your learning of how yo handle these feelings (i
E., understanding a shit day or an empty feeling is just that and shall pass; knowing what activities to do or people to talk to or even what work on self could perhaps be done :slight_smile:

Life gets easier when weā€™re sober not because its just a barrel of laughs at all times, but because we learn how to deal with the tough shit. We learn to trust ourselves and our ability to get through these feelings and tough days.

One day at a time my friend. And as my dear old mentor used to always remind me (sometimes with a good chuckle!) ā€œThis too shall pass!ā€ā€¦fuck it didnt feel helpful to hear in some moments, but its true.

Hang in there. Youre doing great xo.

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Hello my dear sober family :slight_smile:
Hope everyone is doing well :slight_smile: I am home here on this winter day with my little one as he has the gastro thats been going around. Hope it doesnt take our whole house down, but very much enjoying the time with him. He is so happy to get to watch some TV, and just cant believe he is getting to watch some of his shows and its not Wrdnesday or the weekend LOL. I imagine i may get a report for him once he is perfectly fine that he is still sick and must stay hpme to watch some more hot wheels :slight_smile:

Getting ready for Christmas and almost there. I have another cart full of things to order and then I am all done. Getting paid tomorrow and thata going to be so nice. Ran the budget of our expenses and our income, and once we get going we will be I HOPE comfortable. Man the cost of living is a real kick in the arse and you know i have come to deeply appreciate the Boomers who recognize how costly things are for our generation! Its no joke out here :sunglasses:

Keep pushing forward people and have a great 25th hour
Xo

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Such a beautifull area you live in Laner. If I see al that snow I wonder if you notice much of the climate changes where you live??

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Awesome!! Congrats!

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Yes Philip!!! Nice!!!

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Thank you @Mira_D I am not feeling too good. It is good to know that the bad feelings are temporary.

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Checking in day 346 AF :blush:

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Day 1033
Did the awake overnight last night with my son. Wasnt too bad i guess. Once my son went off to school, i went to the gym and then came home to tidy up the apartment. My body feels tired but my mind doesnā€™t. And I dont really want to sleep during the day bcuz then my sleep tonight will be wonky. It dawned on me today actually how i havent thought about drugs in quite some time. I NEVER imagined that i would be able to get to this point, where drugs werent on my mind. I feel really, REALLY blessed today. Hope everyone is enjoying their day!
:butterfly:

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