@Chevy55 Congrats on 11 months sober! You’re killing it.
@Noshame I didn’t really care much for cell phones back then. As long as I could call and text people, I was good, lol. I had an old phone for the longest. I’d even get clowned on. I didn’t care, tho. But then I realized how shitty the photo quality was. I had to get myself a better celly. I mean, it’s still not the latest model, but it works for me.
@Just_Laura Yeah, I feel ya. I don’t miss the bubble guts either. Feeling bloated and shit. Crazy what the poison can do to your insides. No more beer shits. I don’t miss em.
@Rockstar24777 The little drummer boy fuckin up during the holiday season? That’s fucked up. Hopefully, he’ll get his shit together.
Day 1146 AF. Not a whole lot to report. I’m feeling exhausted today. The little man caught a stomach bug. Gonna keep him home from school tomorrow.
Gotta wake up early for a department meeting, then a doctor’s appointment.
I totally get that.
Life can be overwhelming at times and escaping sounds so good. Escaping won’t change anything though. Maybe you could jot down things that make you feel like escaping and then think one or two steps what you can do to make things better. You don’t have to face everything at once. Take your time and take small steps.
Stormy weather out there. And tomorrow again. It’s the time of the year for it I guess. My home is warm. I might go out for a little walk or something but not much more. It’s good as it is today and so am I. Let’s make today as good a day as we all can friends. Sober and clean. Love from my little square .
After-2AM check in on Friday.
Been up and productive without a decent stop since 5:45 AM on Thursday. Crushed the workday, and trust me: I nailed the parent and husband duties.
At 10PM I opened an expensive imported craft beer that’s been sitting in the side of my basement fridge for awhile, thinking “why not? Just sip it, stay sober, and move on.”
I let it sit on the counter while I power-cleaned the main floor of my home, and tidied the second floor. I then dumped the can out in my front yard.
I regret that I almost ruined my Friday.
Glad that I’m going to bed sober.
Also glad that my 19-month old daughter, who I’m home alone with, has still never seen me inebriated.
Peace, and have a great Friday everyone.
Whoa, that was close! Good for you for throwing this beer out. Let me tell you, I totally understand how taking care of house and kids is exhausting. I had many “fuck it” moments myself. Once again, glad you got rid of that beer. Could easily not end up good, not at all.
But the fact that your daughter never seen you drunk or hangover, that’s huge! Keep it that way, stay strong! You are doing great
Day 641
Checking in from a Dutch motorway. Made it to the continent on the overnight ferry. A long weekend with my other half for some Christmas markets and Christmas shopping.
At 2:20 am, a couple of drunk guys tried to unlock our cabin door on the ferry. Had to tell them they got the wrong room
I’m glad to be sober
@PositiveThoughts Wow! Truly well done with tossing that beer. I so get the ‚fuck it, why not‘ mentality when you are working, parenting and trying to be a good spouse. You did a heroic thing, for yourself, your family and your little one @Mno Isn‘t Saint Nicholas day quite a thing in the Netherlands? @BrownGecko You are absolutely not alone in wanting to escape. And you also do not have to tackle everything at the same time. You know the slogan: One day at a time. You take care of today. As good as you can. And you keep staying sober your nr. one priority. Do you have emotional support from people around you? A recovery group? Whatever it is, it‘s easier with help, friend. @SoberWalker Enjoy your goldsmith class! I hope we get to see what you are working on. @Just_Laura I don‘t know what age your daughter is, but this is how teenagers test the rules around them. I was a pro with trying to get away with all kinds of shit back in the day. I needed to test every single rule, especially in school. My poor teachers. Feeling sorry for them But I think that is was a vital part of growing up. There are so many rules in this world - especially put onto girls, that you need to find out which to heed and which to toss. And frankly school is a rather safe environment to test the waters. Better now homework than later with something more serious. @Noshame So sorry to hear you are having such a hard time. The phone situation does sound like a mess, but it is not your fault you got talked into buying stuff and then scammed. I know I always feel ashamed in such situations: How could I have been so guillable. But honestly this is not your fault. It‘s what those scammers and pushers pry on. It is their fault and not yours. So maybe you can have some compassion for yourself, forgive yourself. Sending love @MooseTracks 27 months is huge! You are an inspiration for all of us. Thank you for sharing your wins in sobriety @Butterflymoonwoman Hoping your son‘s results will be in soon, and he‘ll be able to get the treatment he needs. Also sending healing vibes his way @zzz Thanks for the man in ‚action‘ @Millie_1987 Well done on resisting the temptations so early in your recovery. That‘s great work
It is Saint Nicholas day around here. A day loved and celebrated by all the children. My daughter put her boots outside yesterday before going to bed and truly found a present and a treat in them this morning. That‘s how Saint Nicholas works
The app timer tells me no UltraProcessedFood since 8 months. I remember trying gluten free bread at that time. It didn‘t suit me. I‘m glad that stuff is no longer part of my eating.
I‘m feeling slightly better today than the last days. Thank you all for caring
Last night was much better than the previous ones. I woke up at 3am but instead of trempbling in panic I just listened to the storm outside, my partner breathing beside me, moved a bit and finally fell asleep again. I also managed to get up and be about this morning, wash my hair, make breakfast. I am very glad I am able to do these simple things again.
Depending on my well being I‘ll do some stuff around the flat, try to be active and chill otherwise.
Today‘s picture is a bit of snow to celebrate Saint Nicholas. Although the picture was taken in July a few years ago in Norway, the elevation is high enough to grant snow and ice year long.
Sinterklaas is celebrated here on the night of 5 December (like Christmas Eve), a night known as pakjesavond. It’s still popular here but there’s competition from Christmas these days. One of the main reasons is the way Sinterklaas is portrayed here (an 19th century invention): As an old white bishop on a horse, with a load of black servants called zwarte pieten (actually people in blackface) doing his work. After protests the black servants have been largely replaced by so called roetveegpieten or sooth Petes, as if they got their faces covered in sooth from climbing down the chimneys delivering presents. But then again conservative folks can’t stand this modernization and demand black faced Petes. Troubles. Whatever. Sorry for the novel. Could expand a lot to include Krampus and this whole black face Piet discussion but I won’t.
BTW, did your kid put a carrot for Sinterklaas’ horse in her boot? She should!
Thanks for the background on Sinterklaas. Carrots are not a thing here. Usually kids will setup cookies and milk, maybe a drawing like in your picture, or some other present for Sinterklaas. Next year I’ll encourage here to put a carrot in her boot
Krampus sounds a bit like Knecht Ruprecht around here.
PSA: nicotine now counts as active use. Posting while ‘under the influence’ now includes every single one of you vapers and smokers. And those using pouches, lozenges or patches to quit. Talking about switching from vaping to lozenges is ‘openly discussing moderation.’
The jury’s still out on coffee. But I think the coffee thread and the food thread should be moved to seeking help. They’re both basically threads on ‘moderation.’
Day off from gym yesterday, slept like a baby last night and for first time ever (I believe) my body battery charged to 100% while I slept. My fitness age has just about met my chronological age (half year over still, but coming into alignment), my goal is to get it 5+ years under my actual age… I’ll need to lose weight though which seems to not wish to work with me.
Regardless, I enjoy seeing my physical health continually improving.
Today is gym though I’m not sure what it will be. Should be leg day but I may do that tomorrow and do an upper body superset… dunno for certain.
That said I am thinking of going in town to do some running around shopping though I’m mostly done, perhaps stocking stuffer things… I haven’t been in town since I began my month off, almost a month ago now. I haven’t even gone through half a tank of fuel in truck in the last month. lol.
Probably won’t go in as I’d rather gym I think… we’ll see.
Have a good day all…
@Just_Laura … teenagers eh? They like to test things. See what things work for them and how closely people watch. I think she’s testing the system. lol. I think of the shit I did and what I got away with and compare. They typically are doing much better than I did when their age. Best of luck
I live in a rural village in Kyrgyzstan and it is beautiful Do you still ski sometimes? How’d you get into nordic skiing? Really interesting. I like to cross country ski but don’t have a set of skis here so I mostly do snow shoeing and ice climbing.
Made it to an AA meeting last night instead of giving in to any cravings. Even just on my walk there I passed an advertisement for alcohol, the LCBO and a weed shop in the span of 15 mins. Gotta love living in the city. It’s crazy how readily available this stuff is and because it’s “legal” you think you’re not doing much harm. Thankfully I have learned the harm it can cause and I want to break free from the chains of addiction! Have a doctor’s appointment later today and then a meeting with a financial advisor to help get my finances in order. And will maybe attend a drop in yoga session. Feeling okay overall. Gonna keep on this sobriety path and see where it leads.
But I think that is was a vital part of growing up. There are so many rules in this world - especially put onto girls, that you need to find out which to heed and which to toss. And frankly school is a rather safe environment to test the waters. Better now homework than later with something more serious.
day around here. A day loved and celebrated by all the children. My daughter put her boots outside yesterday before going to bed and truly found a present and a treat in them this morning. That‘s how Saint Nicholas works 
we’ll see.
