click
Ohhhhhh, i understand.
Anyways, nice assassins creed picture.
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You probably wonāt get rid of the obsession with using right at the beginning, but 4 days sober can already bring a lot of realizations into your life. From what you say, it seems to be working. Iāve done this a few times, and I had to sober up from quite a few substances besides drinking. It all seemed impossible at the beginning because they do rule your life in the end, and we just follow their lead. You can definitely live a sober life and discover so much more than what you can expect from addiction. It looks boring at the beginning, but if you keep an open mind and listen to the stories of others, a new life will unfold before you. This is a promise, not just a hope.
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Hello everyone!
DAY 35 - Check-in
It has been raining for the past two days, and I couldnāt take my daily walk by the beach and meditate in nature. A part of me really hopes that the gallery will call soon to invite me to India, good weather for all winter, but another part of me is okay with taking on another challenge and expecting a quieter winter, and start looking again for local galleries ā¦ I hoped to have passed that phase but I need to accept the flow of events without taking it too personal.
Weāll see. There is always a point in my work where I really donāt like where I am going with my current painting, and all I can think about at night is what direction to take. Experience always shows me that artworks have their own life, and they will eventually tell me when they are done. This one is already two weeks in, and it seems to me that it will take a bit longer than usual. I miss the very big canvas and a bigger studio, but for now, I am grateful for what I have. There is always a reason for everything. ODATT!
Today I am grateful for:
- my studio
- my brushes
- my canvas and colors
Wishing you all a great 24 sober hours!
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959
Crap sleep. Got in bed later than usual, fell asleep even later. Got woken up by my cat two hours before my alarm bc he was screaming (screaming 
) like he was being murdered. Nope! Just being a jackass for no reason at 5am 
We went to the hospital early for some kind of family/ healthcare team meeting they scheduled yesterday to talk about the plan moving forward. Shocker! Some doctors were unavailable and the others were unaware of it 
They said to come back tomorrow, but couldnāt give a precise time 
So my dadās already been laying in bed 3 weeks and now even longer bc they canāt synch their team up?! I see how people end up with pneumonia, waiting around for answers. Itās frustrating. Anyway, I need sleep and hope to catch up more around here tomorrow. Odaat 
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Iām so sorry to hear this, and yes, the health care system sucks, but everywhere! As long as they park people and give them pills, the job of the system is done. Hopefully, better days are ahead for this planet and society. Sending you love and strength.
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680 sugar
544 UPF
Beautiful sunny fall morning. Groceries and nothing much else today. Hormenes are driving me nuts. Need lots of down time.
Peace and love always 
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Checking in
First vacation sober and Iām still sober, managed to find NA beer in Tokyo so thatās great, the only bad thing is not all restaurants/bars have thoseā¦ in that case I just drink ice tea. Oh well, enjoying my vacation hangover-free
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- Itās a very foggy morning out there! Iām back from 6am HIIT class which I absolutely loved.. It was my first time going and Iām hooked!! Iām having to switch up my classes and routines unfortunately, as I currently have a blood clot /digital thrombosis in my little finger as well as a painful lump that is yet to be diagnosed. Itās getting me down the past week to be honest. I thought of drinking, seriously. It wasnāt a dalliance with the thoughts, it was full on crave and enslave. I havenāt checked in here for a few days because to be honest I didnāt want to, I was feeling so much apathy and low level resentment. Of what, Iām working on figuring out. Maybe a churlish resentment that we canāt drink anymore and you fuckers remind me of that.
. What I did do instead (because I realised my recovery was in question and my attitude needed a retune) is attend a Recovery Dharma meeting on Tuesday evening and then a Smart Recovery meeting on Wednesday afternoon. And an AA meeting last night. It was really nice to see all different angles and methodology and to hear the shares and ponder the topics. Iāve never attended RD or SMART before so that was quite nice. Iām going to attend them both again next week as the group was in the UK and the people were very nice and welcoming. It kind of dragged me out of the mire. Iāve also started my Winter Arc challenge yesterday: 90 ISH days of the year left to take the reigns and make a difference to my self control/discipline and in turn reap the rewards of a good mental, psychological, emotional and physical routine and dedication. I started this Winter Arc self challenge 
yesterday with 6.45am weightlifting class then prepared and spray enameled a radiator back to itās beautiful shiny white former self. I made good homemade food and drank water and attended my recovery classes and read. Iāve started to journal. I will report my Winter Arc daily activities and pledges, but urge anyone who wants to join me on this and to make the very best of the next 90 days to join me on thisā¦ Yes, thereās still 90 days left to challenge yourself and transform your daily routine and lifeā¦ 
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Checking in, day 1 (again). Itās ok. Iām
Not giving up.
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Gather more tools. Fight through the craving they will pass. The first few days are the hardest. Do you have a plan to fight them when they hit you?
One of the worst times of the day for me was right after work. Some of things that helped me were
Was like taken a shower right after I got of work.
Going for a walk
Grabbing ice tea, or coffee
Start cooking
Go to bed ( did this a lot and I think needed)
Cleaning something
Have something sweet to eat (alcohol has huge amounts of sugar)
Some of this may sound silly. But changing up my routine even ever so slightly helped a lot.
Just get that head to the pillow sober. @jallyson
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Hey all, checking in on day 1936. I hope everybody has a good one!
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Procedure went OK. And nothing seems to be wrong so thatās even better. Thanks Col.
@Axsis Huge congrats Mykola, awesome numbers! Thanks for checking in and sharing.
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Great news mno. 
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Oh yeah, like what?
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Day 10! Wondering why I didnāt come here before relapsing. I had been white knuckling sobriety for over a year before I let everything go to shit. Iām honestly happy to be starting over, honestly. I really need to work on myself and I wasnāt doing that for the longest time.
woke up before the sun and had a pumpkin spice coffee. 
Made the girls chocolate chip waffles and meal prepped some cottage cheese egg bites. Got everyone to school with no yelling. Ive wanted to learn to make sour dough for a long time so I think today might be the day! Wishing you all a great sober day.
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73 days THC free and 37 days MO free. Yesterday was a good day. I went to an AA meeting, then Bible study at 12, and church in the pm. Today Iām at the dentists office with a church friend and her girls. I had agreed to help out and Iām keeping my word. Iām hoping we got out in time for our group later. Then we have our monthly staff meeting at work this afternoon. She didnāt bring up the job interview from yesterday and I didnāt ask. Itās going to be a chill day
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Checking in with positive vibes. Letās see, yesterday was good. Beautiful, warm weather. Iāll take 80 degrees on the 1st of October. Work was good, no major problems. Last night was bowling league. I did great. Had a 627 series. Had a lot of fun with my teammates and the guys on the other team. Everyone was being silly and we laughed a lot - no alcohol involved.
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Day 1772.. No Alcohol
Day 68.. No Lust
Rain for the next 4 days off but mainly on.
Might turn into snow.. LETS GOO BAYBAYYY!
Made some more Rodeo friends, in 3 weeks it seems im going to go bulldogging.
More adventure awaits thats when i know im truly in Gods joy. When im open to just learning something new. Just openly going after it.
Still meeting so many new and wonderful people. Just truly enjoying life.
Godās Joy is something we can attempt to gain in this world, we can go for, but only He can bring us this feeling. Things ive done 100 times, those things just hit different.
In Jesus mighty name. Thank you, Lord.
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