Day 0. I am new here. A friend recommended this site. I am truly messed up and need help. I am at almost at the edge - almost to the point of killing myself. I have many issues and I am lost. I need help. Please do no recommend helplines and docs. That doesn’t work. Otherwise I wouldn’t be here. Anyway, let’s hope that that I can turn day zero to day 1. wish me luck.
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Day 70
Nothing new here. My sleep was scrappy but I am up and alive. I am gonna take it easy at work and maybe go to a meeting today. See how things go. I am off to work happy, healthy and sober. Have a great day everyone
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Welcome here friend. To do this we don’t need luck. I wish you lots of success instead. Let me tell what helped me the most when I quit. The first thing was the realization I couldn’t do it alone. I needed my peers to help me. I found them right here. Due to my social anxiety -which has gotten a lot better by now- online and in writing felt much safer for me than in person meetings. But many people are helped by those too. Buddhist ones, secular ones, 12 step ones, Christian ones. Whatever suits suits. Plenty of those online too btw.
A second thing I needed was knowledge, of addiction, of the substances I was (am) addicted to, of recovery, how to beat addiction, how to stay sober and clean. Found lots of knowledge here but also in other places on internet and in books.
And thirdly I needed professional help. I needed to go into therapy and work on the issues that caused me to flee into drugs and booze in the first place. I had enough of life at the end of my 40 years using streak. I did know that I didn’t want to live no more like that though. I didn’t want to die per se, I just wanted out. It’s been a long journey and lots of work but it’s so worth it.
This is me. You have to find what works for you. It all started out with finding my peers and I feel that’s universally true. Welcome again. I hope you can find your way friend.
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Welcome 
So glad you are here. You can find a lot of support here. Read around and use the search to look for more threads that are helpful for you.
Please keep in mind that we are no professionals. We only share what we experienced individually.
For me, an important step was to fully accept that I am an addict. I understood that I need to work on sobriety by reflecting and changing my physical behaviour and mental mindset. I wouldn’t have done it all by myself, I needed help from this forum, books, podcasts, friends, programs and also doctors.
Please feel free to always come here and ask for help before consuming or harming yourself. We are here for you.
Do you already have any ideas what you can to to stay sober today?
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You’re absolutely right. Explanation by Arthur Brooks :
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thank you @Mno for the wonderful welcome. I don’t even know what works for me, Just very confused right now.
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I am am trying to get sober but I keep slipping back again and again. My average time is 2 days sober. Trying to get out of this 2 day cycle. I have serious CPTSD issues too, which muddies the waters. I am like a lost case. Everyone has given up.
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Really glad you’re here–it’s a great first step! Don’t worry about tomorrow, or even about later today. Get through the next 5 minutes and the next 5 minutes after that. Check in here so we can cheer you on!
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You’ve not given up on you as you are here now. And we won’t give up on you. Promise. We’re in this together and that’s not a hollow phrase. And, like me, you seem to know peer support works or you wouldn’t be here yes? At least you’re willing to give it a try.
Like I said, I needed therapy. Badly. I did schema (group) therapy first, which gave me a lot of insight into how I function and how that came about. I’m diagnosed with some mixed cluster B and C PD’s but to me that’s mainly just a label, something needed to have therapy covered by insurance. It doesn’t define me at all. After that I got to work on the CPTSD issues I have as well. Did different types of somatic therapy, still doing some now, after 5 years, and ever so slowly getting better at living life. One step at a time and often three steps forward and two back.
First thing I needed for that was being sober and clean though. Being here made me do that successfully. I’m so glad you’re here. Strength in numbers friend.
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Just want to echo what @Mno said–YOU haven’t given up because you’re here, and that’s all that matters.
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Day 4.
last year was my best year in means of not drinking. I was sober more time than drunk.
January was hard, but I need a change. Today I had an effective Work session and yesterday I have planned my next 30 day routine. I tend to overdoe things and get stressed out. I planned free time to wind down as well.
Today at 7:30pm I have my first kickboxing session. I hope to gain more self confidence with that. I did combat sport as a kid but haven’t in years. Need something to do besides work.
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Day 83 of being amazing.
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Day 1457
Morning! Just finished putting my son on tbe bus to school and grabbing a coffee from Tim Hortons. Relaxing at home for a bit until my ED zoom mtg at 10am. Then off to the gym and then to the grocery store for odds and ends. Still not feeling 100% tho from my recent illness. Wish i felt completely better, but I will eventually. Have a great day everyone!
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You took the first step already by coming here. Next step might be to immerse yourself in recovery related info. Tons of good stuff right here. Did you read the pinned topic at the top of the forum? It’s a good start and might give you some further ideas. We all need our own plan. There’s a lot of similarities between them too though.
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@Mno has a lot more experience than me and has suggested a great starting point.
For me, truly, it was getting through 5 minutes at a time, and being proud of myself every single time I got through –or even delayed –an urge to numb myself with alcohol. I spent a lot of time distracting myself. I wrote a bunch of quick activities on pieces of paper and put them in a jar (things like, “tidy the garage for 10 minutes”, “walk around the block”, “read 5 random Wikipedia entries”, “go out for coffee”). When I was feeling a strong urge, I made myself draw one and do it before I drank. It almost always worked to distract me enough to get me through the moment.
And when that wasn’t enough, I would come here and just read the experiences of people who know what it’s like. It really really really helped–it’s what has made this sobriety feel more solid than sober stints in the past.
Please keep showing up here. Every single person on TS knows what these early days are like. Think how amazing you will feel when you break your cycle and wake up sober on day 3. 
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Monday morning check-in. Just did a dog walk and daughter drop off. Feeling overwhelmed with all the things I have to do in the next 48 hours before we go away at a big family vacation. My wife and I over-scheduled ourselves, and we don’t have any recovery buffer for all the overnight sleep disruptions.
Gotta keep pushing through.It’s all gonna be worth it.
Take care of yourself. Enjoy the rest of your day.
Edit 1) Lunch. Today I’ve been really focusing on doing one small thing at a time, and keeping my body feeling light. The stress and tension I carry around most of the time are thanked for their good intentions, and sent away peacefully.
Edit 2) afternoon break. I went for a walk to run a couple of errands. I’m struggling with motivation to switch immediately to packing after work for my family trip leaving Wednesday. It will be a busy but pleasant evening of sports class with my daughter, and cooking dinner. I’m happy I haven’t wasted any time on ‘junk’ today. My phone is on black and white and not being carried around. Okay - deep breaths - back into the effort.
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Good morning Sober tribe, checking in for day 3 free of alcohol and THC. 
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Checking in Day 8
Exhausted today. Got up 4 times in the night. Son broke his glasses at school today. Disassociating and not sure how I will do the next 5 hours before bed.
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