Need someone to talk to before I relapse. In the matter of 24 hrs my aunt in Canton Ohio had her house raided by cops over false claims and the today found a recording from one of the Canton Ohio officers threating to put 50 civilians down in a grave. And then to make matters worse my little brother and his now ex gf are being harassed and threatened by 2 old friends that are now threating to pull up to my apt where my brother and his ex gf are now hiding out trying to fight. I ain’t scared of a fight and certainly not scared of these two clowns but my anxiety is now raised high and I’m ready to fight. Normally I would be able to just calm back down after smoking and just ignore the bullshit but since I’m now sober I can’t run to it as badly as I want to right now
I don’t understand fully your story but no matter what keep a clear head/mind it looks like you gonna need it. Stay sober!!!
I know that was lot to take in so let me try and break it down alil.
Situation number 1 involving my family in Canton Ohio (I live in Houston Tx separated from them so all my info is from them)
My Aunt had her house raided last night after a Canton Ohio officer was killed and a false report was made blaming my cousin/ her son (all false reports)
My Aunt then this morning from a friend of hers has received a recorded message of one of the Canton Ohio officers stating because of the killing of a cop there are willing to put up to 50 civilians in graves because of the killing. That story is still on going trying to get more info as we speak. I do have a copy of the recording from my aunt.
Situation number 2 (yeah it’s a lot to process in 24hrs) My 22 year old little brother and his gf just broke up a couple days ago. Today my brother received a phone call from someone off a fake number threating to kill him and threating to (I won’t say the actual word but let’s say it that bad word with a R) his now ex gf after breaking into her house. I then told him to grab his ex and come to my apt to hide out for awhile and just be safe (I have an off duty gang task force Houston cop that lives underneath me). After about 10 minutes of them being here he received a text message stating they know they ran to an apartment complex to hide and they are otw. Now I nessicarrly don’t believe this juvenile bs (I’m 29 almost 30 I’m to old for this shit) but I don’t not play well when my family is threatened and I don’t play well with that bad r word.
So now only 48hrs after deciding to get clean this is all hitting me and I feel like I want to just run back to everything just to calm down but I know I can’t
I’m breathing a lil better. Trying to just forget about everything
And update on the Second situation (the last post was a draft since I couldn’t reply for a certain amount of time) no one showed up and they eventually went home and haven’t heard anything since
Thank goodness.
Thank you for caring enough to check on me though it’s truly appreciated
OK, this is REALLY intense for being over 48 hours sober. I’m going to have to say that I’m in awe of you right now.
I detest cops, for this reason, and for something that happened to me. They gave me PTSD, and from what I’m hearing you go through, that is terrifying. It’s like they are all going on some crazy killing frenzy.
I’m like really impressed right now, my blood is boiling lol, and it’s not even me.
As for your little bro and his ex. It’s always better to be safe than sorry. I don’t trust that cop downstairs. Not sure if you have a relationship with him or not.
Is there somewhere safe you could go? A hotel, just in case? Preferably one with multiple stories. Are you near downtown Houston at all?
You are going to get through this, you 100% did the right thing by coming here.
oopsi poopsi… Just saw this one after I posted. So glad they’re safe. I would probably check on them here and there. Wow, this is a lot. I’m really glad you’re here 
I trust the cop downstairs he’s old school. He’s also ex military and basically has adopted me as the son he never had. Trust me I thought I was Guna relapse so badly. Only thing I hate is I needed someone to talk to badly and this app wouldn’t let me reply to anyone for a certain amount of time.
Oh and to top all this off the gas station across the street from me got robbed by three guys with AR15s. The cops caught them but still scary shit
Try to focus on what you can control to keep yourself safe and sober.
I thought I had drama, and I’m not gonna lie, I saw your post title and was like “here for it” lol. I was not expecting the danger of the drama, got my adrenaline going. Well, now yo have enough posts to post as often as you need, yes? There is also “seeking help” that you can choose to opt into, and that typically will have much quicker replies.
Seriously though, I extremely impressed that you came here. That says to me that you’re serious about getting better.
How long are you in your lease for? It sound like it might be time for a fresh start in a safer part of town? Being triggered on a regular basis is rough.
I know it’s early, but do you do anything outside of here like therapy or AA or another type of support group?
We just signed a year lease back in feb. And I just wanted to say I fully understand the PTSD. I am very ain’t (certain) cops and very ain’t governmental. And I’m not so sure I’m still a new member I just joined yesterday. It would just be nice to have someone to talk to that kinda understands. That’s why I love this community so much. I’ve already planned for when I get paid Monday to pay for the premium part of it. And I will say today was a massive test for me and I almost failed
And I have social anxiety very badly that normally the drugs helped with but now being sober it’s so hard to be in public till I learn to deal with it
same here, talk to your doc. there’s medication for social anxiety, lord knows I’m on it. My therapist called my doctor and told her that I need to be on valium because my agoraphobia progressed and I hadn’t left the house for months. Plus, I couldn’t zoom or speak on the the phone. I was feeling so unworthy. So, the medication, combined with therapy, and this place, really saved my life on more than just this occasion, many times over the years. I need to look up my resets, I suck. I’m sure people here were like sure, you just keep coming back lol.
I am literally falling asleep typing, and my dogs are torturing me lol.
- Go get you some sleep Hun sleep is key for everything.
- What’s a doctor? Lmfao idk that term (yes I’m being sarcastic haven’t seen one since I was 13)
- I’m also an ex pill popper so a lot of the meds for my anxiety and shit I can’t take for my own safety
the main one I’ve been on is Zoloft, there’s nothing fun about it, other than it saved my life.
The valium was definitely a risk, as are the muscle relaxers. However, I don’t take them as prescribed, I take them more so as needed, so I always have extra. I have a nerve disorder, a blood didorder… OK, I’m tapping out. I think my poor head is bobbling.
Stay strong! Glad you’re here! I’ll check on. you tomorrow
I’ma try and pass out as well. Just Guna cuddle with my cat and try hopefully to fall asleep. Ever since I quit my insomnia is Fucking me up
Hey you vented on here instead of going and relapsing so that is something to be very proud of! And there is no shame in the med game. Im on medication and helps me very much! Hope everything gets better and thanks for reaching out to us on this app!