Closure adoption

I was adopted after 8.5 years of physical abuse by my mother in and out of foster homes by age 2 im trying to find some closure in my life but idk if im going about it the right way the adoption was open but my baby sister seems to know more about my life before the adoption than I do any advice would be muchly appreciated

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I am so so sorry for what you’re going through. My older sister was adopted when my mother gave birth to her. My mom was a teenager and living in a different state so nobody knew. My mom went the rest of her life not telling anyone, until my sister found us when I was around the age of 11, due to the adoption being open. Everything worked out for the best in the end. But my sister never knew she was adopted, she only found out when her adopted mom, who she thought was her bio mom, passed away and she found the adoption papers while sorting her things…My sister forgave my mother and is a part of our family and we talk everyday, but that doesn’t stop her from feeling like she missed out on so much of her life, missed out on the family she never knew she had. It really gave her an identity crisis. She still has an identity crisis. I wish in this moment I was her so I could give you advice or try to relate to you in some way but I can’t. She could if she was here. Again, I am so sorry you’re feeling this way.

I’m sorry to hear that, thank you for sharing. I too was adopted when I was young by my grandparents. I had some family sexual trauma and I have only just recently came to the realization that for me (and you may be different) there is no true closure. It’s acceptance that you went through what you went through and it does not define who you are as a person. You can control your life and your actions and you can chose to try to figure everything out and think it will help, but there’s a chance it could harm. It’s up to you if you want to see what that door will open. I tried to go down the rabbit hole that was my past life and it brought nothing but more pain and resentment for those family members.

So the power is yours. You can chose to know more about that past life, or be present. It’s a hard choice to make, but it’s all yours to decide. Either way you chose just remember you are strong, brave and courageous. Sending you good vibes in your journey!