How do I not drink tomorrow? I’m determined to get through today but I’m really concerned about tomorrow. Any advice with coping with the pain would be appreciated. I can’t handle any of it. I don’t like being sad, I don’t like all the people (it’s draining and a trigger), I don’t like being in my own skin. I miss my dad. My brain is actively telling me to drink and run away.
How? Well, tomorrow is about your father. If you pick up a drink…it will forever be about your relapse. Drinking will only numb and supress your true feelings. Feelings that you will have to eventually deal with. Grieve, cry, scream, pray, laugh at good memories with family. Just embrace all the feelings that will come tomorrow.
My condolences on the passing of your father. All I know is that if you drink, the next day you’re going to be dealing with those same grief feelings, on top of the guilt of relapsing. You will be so much better equipped to handle these emotions with a sober mind. You can do this. Keep us handy on your phone and check in when you can. We’ll help you through this my friend.
I’m so sorry to hear of your father passing, I can imagine it’s going to be hard but be strong, my friend. It will be a testament to your strength and love for your father. Picture him smiling and proud of you sweetie.
We’re here if you need us. 
So sorry for your loss. As everyone above as stated,…drinking will only make things worse. Maybe a sober friend can accompany you. Hang in there and know that your Dad would be proud of your sobriety. Push through this
.
So sorry for your loss. Live one day at a time, you don’t know if you are alive tomorrow, so it doesn’t matter.
So sorry to hear about your dad 
I lost my dad just over a year ago and had similar thoughts of drinking. But for me, personally, I knew drinking would make me feel worse. I reached out to some sober friends I met on here (including @Thirdmonkey who’s already posted above) , and they really helped. I’m glad you’re also reaching out. I wanted to honour him by not drinking (he happened to be an alcoholic) and my mum passed a couple years before so it was to honour her too as she loathed alcohol. For me, the biggest hurdle was actually AFTER the funeral. When at the hotel, the night before I flew back home. My hubby & son were in the pool and I had an OVERWHELMING desire to drink, just to forget or feel “normal”… but I reached out and did not drink, knowing I’d be overcome with guilt, huge anxiety & regret. I am so glad I made that choice. I’d faltered with sobriety since, but I am so very glad I made it through that hurdle sober. It’s a big proud moment for me. Big hugs. 
@Thirdmonkey and @Dv713 give some sage advice here. I’m coming up on two years since my mom died. The time I spent with her in the icu, followed by the wake and funeral were an amazing time for me to stop being a selfish prick. When sober…I realized that, this wasn’t about me, this was about being present for my mother. Honoring her life and death, and choosing how I wanted to act in hard times. There is a choice to run away, or a choice to stand and deliver. My mom deserved the best version of me…and I tried to give that to her. When home, I sobbed, I yelled, I cried, I watched way too much Harry Potter (weirdly calming to my nervous system) and ate gluten free pizza and ice cream whenever I freaking felt like it.
And what I can say now is that: I have done an infinitely better job processing her death than I ever could have drink or using. The universe dolled out a shit ton of difficult work…and you know what? I DID it. There is an inner strength that this situation taught me I am capable of, and I am a better person for making it through. Please feel free to DM me if you need support today or in the coming days.



So sorry for ur lost , for knowing to much the feeling my self my dad past when I was14 years old . Drinking will numb the pain and everything that comes with it but in those time you need to face it learn from emotions and give ur self time …better days are ahead keep ur head up take it one minute at a time …sending you strength prayers 
I would like to say that I’m very, very sorry for your loss. You remember all the good times you’ve had with your father and you continue honoring his memory by not drinking at all. That is what he would want you to do and you know it. Be strong for him and the rest of your family, my friend and just know that all you have to do is reach out to any one of us on here if you need to because we’re all here for you, my friend.
He definitely would. Is staying sober for someone else going to last until I’m able to find a reason for myself?
As I watched my mom die in November, I thought about how proud she was of me for my sobriety. She never complained when I was drinking, but her praise when I quit let me know how worried she had been while I was drinking. Grief and loss are always difficult. Nobody wants to be sad. Learning to deal with grief in a way that doesn’t impair the memories of who I lost and simultaneously degrade me is key. As I get older it is clear is that there will be more death and loss and I need to learn to be able to handle it in a way that doesn’t destroy me. The pain doesn’t go away when you get drunk. It’s still there. You still have to find a way to deal with your loss before you can move on. I’m very sorry about your father.
The idea of Sobriety has entered your mind for a reason and that reason is because you and alcohol do not mix. You know why you need to be Sober and you know more than ANYONE else what will happen if you pick up and drink.
I got tired of it all. I got tired of letting myself down over and over again. I got tired of drinking and drugging with fools that didn’t give a shit about me, I got tired of seeing my mother and sister’s cry when I become Mr. Hyde. I’m a Monster when I drink man.
You know what I’m talking about, you know what I mean because you, like me, can’t drink. Yes, you are absolutely right. You have to do this for YOURSELF most importantly. Tomorrow, mourn your father, Sober and then begin YOUR life a new. By you coming here and pouring your soul out proves to Yourself that yoi can do it.
Stay strong good soul…!
I send you lots of strength, love & hope
what happens externally should never dictate what takes place internally, and neither your strong & free future self nor your father (peace be upon him
) would wish upon you to suffer for any day more than you already have
Be sober and conscious tomorrow and you will not regret it I promise you!
Please don’t beat yourself up if you do relapse, but you know a fresh start is what you really want… Stay with us, and be there for yourself as much as I hope you know we all are… All the best good soul 
I am sorry for your loss. Not much to add to what’s already said above.
Let the little bastard in your head tell what he wants. And then tell him to shut up and leave the room. Say stop.
When I lost my grandma some weeks ago, it was the first sober loss I had. Honestly I was happy to feel the sadness and cry in bed alone. I felt good about it. To have the memories and being sober. The sadness passed more quickly. Of course it was not my mom. I think going through the emotions sober helps to let them go more quickly.
If you want to run, I think you don’t have to stay until late night after the funeral. You could run. You have all the right to be sad alone. I wish you strength and kindness for yourself. You deserve feeling the feelings.
Tomorrow is tomorrow. How do you feel today? Are you making it through the grief and longing? Yes, yes you are.
Feelings will not kill you, and in fact the pain in the moment of the feeling is fleeting. You are strong enough to sit with a feeling for 5 minutes, as long as a prayer for help and clarity of mind will take to say.
My biggest problem with feelings is being afraid of them - the additional dread, even terror, that a strong feeling would obliterate me. And it was by sitting, sober, and allowing the feeling to wash over me like the surf that I learned it was not going to destroy me. In fact, feeling the feelings makes me better in that moment, allows me to connect with others who may be feeling the same way.
And of course, death is the time most of us contemplate on how connected all energies “alive” or “dead” really are.
From “Twenty four hours a day”, meditation for May 1.
All material things, the universe, the world, even our bodies, may be Eternal Thought expressed in time and space. The more the physicists and astronomers reduce matter; the more it becomes a mathematical formula, which is thought. In the final analysis, matter is thought. When Eternal Thought expresses itself within the framework of space and time, it becomes matter. Our thoughts, within the box of space and time, cannot know anything firsthand, except material things. But we can deduce that outside the box of space and time is Eternal Thought, which we can call God.
Thank you for all the great advice. It has given me a lot to contemplate. I’m in a better state mentally but still dreading tomorrow. You guys are great!
Concentrate on listening and helping your other family members. That’s all I’ve got. Take care.