But the alcoholic . . . will be absolutely unable to stop drinking on the basis of self-knowledge. Alcoholics Anonymous
Our program says three things are more important than knowing ourselves: (1) admitting we have no control over our addiction, (2) believing in a Higher Power, and (3) turning our lives over to the care of that Higher Power. knowing ourselves makes our lives better in recovery. But it does not give us sobriety.
Sobriety starts with surrender to our Higher Power. We now know we need faith and strength we get from a Higher Power. We also need the support of others in our program.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, thanks you for my sobriety today. Teach me what I need to know about myself to do Your will today.
Action for the Day: Today, Iāll talk with my sponsor about the change in my spirit that keeps me sober.
We quickly learn that itās wrong to do anything that āfeedsā a drinking habit. A recovering person would be foolish, for example, to spend time in a drinking environment simply to ābe with friends.ā
Itās constructive to take that same approach toward other problems weād like to get out of our lives. If gossip has been my problem, I should not feed it by listening to gossip or even by reading gossipy articles and books. If I have accumulated debts through overspending, I should cut off window shopping and other practices that may bring on more unnecessary debt. And if I want to rid my life of self-pity, I should not spend a single moment brooding over the bad breaks I have had in the past.
Bad habits have a life of their own. They are somewhat like rodents that have found their way into the house and have become star borders. One way to control rodents is to eliminate their food supply. That same principle applies to bad habits we want to eliminate from our own lives.
Iāll make a strong effort to cut off any line of thinking that feeds my bad habits, whatever they are. This might include avoiding practices that others see as harmless and trivial. However, nothing is harmless or trivial if it has become destructive in my life.
Our program is based on bending. We call it āsurrender.ā We surrender our self-will to the care of God. We do what we believe our Higher Power want us to do. We learn this as an act of love.
Many of us believed surrender was a sign of weakness. We tried to control everything. But we change as weāre in the program longer and longer. We learn to bend. We start to see that what is important is learning. We learn to do whatās best for us and others. To learn, we need an open mind. To bend, we must stay open. Love and care become the center of our lives.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, teach me that strength comes from knowing how and when to bend.
Action for the Day: Today, Iāll check myself. How open am I? Do I bend when I need to?
I love these bits from As Bill sees it. These snippets make me so curious about his life and the discernment he had to write down thoughts and perceptions worth sharing. Thanks for sharing these, Mandi! Did I mention that Iām reading the Daily Ponderables website, and listening to its compilerās podcast, Cup of Joe? Itās got some NA and Al-Anon content I find helpful for my own recovery / discovery journey.
Some of us clung to the claim that when drinking we never hurt anybody but ourselves. Our families didnāt suffer, because we always paid the bills and seldom drank at home. Our business associates didnāt suffer, because we were usually on the job. Our reputations didnāt suffer, because we were certain few knew of our drinking.
Those who did would sometimes assure us that, after all, a lively bender was only a good manās fault. What real harm, therefore, had we done? No more, surely, than we could easily mend with a few casual apologies.
This attitude, of course, is the end result of purposeful forgetting. It is an attitude which can be changed only by a deep and honest search
of our motives and actions.
God, help me welcome all the new experiences in my life. Give me the courage to calmly walk my path today, knowing Iām right where I
need to be. ~Melody Beattie
The past and the future are great places to visit, but you donāt want to live there.
āTom Payne
Today I will ignore āwhat might have been,ā and concentrate on āwhat isā¦ā
Whether we had been believers or unbelievers, we began to get over the idea that the Higher Power was a sort of bush-league pinch hitter, to be called upon only in an emergency.
The notion that we would still live our own lives, God helping a little now and then, began to evaporate. Many of us who had thought ourselves religious awoke to the limitations of this attitude. Refusing to place God first, we had deprived ourselves of His help.
But now the words āOf myself I am nothing, the Father doeth the worksā began to carry bright promise and meaning.
The struggle to bring order into our lives starts with lots of little things. One recovering person discovered that it was a good exercise simply to put the cap back on the toothpaste tube in the morning. This was a reminder that things should be put in their proper place, and the discipline helped later in organizing larger matters.
It is very easy to overlook orderly procedures in the haste to get things done, or to avoid anything that seems unpleasant or demanding. But such oversight always carries a heavy price later on. When we donāt return things to their proper place, for example, we lose them or waste hours looking for them. We may bungle a job simply because we were too lazy to look up the right information or to read directions.
Thatās why āFirst things Firstā is much more than just a slogan. Itās actually a principle for living, a guide that tells us there is an orderly approach to everything. If we can find that order without becoming slavishly compulsive about it, weāll find that it simplifies lots of things later on.
Iāll try to do things in an orderly manner today.
When I find myself taking short cuts or becoming too hurried, Iāll regain control by remembering to establish priorities.
āI used to say, āI sure hope things will change.ā Then I learned that the only way things are going to change for me is when I change.ā
āJim Rohn
Were we ever told that our problems with other people really started within ourselves? If we have trouble getting along with another person, for example, is it because we are projecting mixed signals of fear and suspicion toward that person? We tend to reap what we sow----- we get back the attitudes we project.
At the same time, however, we canāt take total responsibility for the way others treat us or behave toward us. We cannot reform or control impossible people. When dealing with impossible people, we have control over our own feelings and responses. This helps us avoid potential trouble and enables us to deal with difficult situations.
But the principle of sowing what we reapā¦.. that is, getting back what we projectā¦ can really be proved by the person whose resentments and bitterness have driven away most of his or her friends. A simple change of attitude on our part can bring startling change for the better in there responses of others. With practice, the principle also applies to the broad area of human relations in many ways. For purposes of inventory, therefore, we should always look first at ourselves and our own thoughts and feelings when we find ourselves in a bad situation with others.
ā¦ā¦.I will take care today to see that my thoughts and feeling toward others reflect what I want in my own life.
