The Seventh Step is where we make the change in our attitude which permits us, with humility as our guide, to move out from ourselves toward others and toward God.
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 76
When I finally asked God to remove those things blocking me from Him and the sunlight of the Spirit, I embarked on a journey more glorious than I ever imagined. I experienced a freedom from those characteristics that had me wrapped up in myself. Because of this humbling Step, I feel clean.
I am especially aware of this Step because Iâm now able to be useful to God and to my fellows. I know that He has granted me strength to do His bidding and has prepared me for anyone, and anything, that comes my way today. I am truly in His hands, and I give thanks for the joy that I can be useful today.
âWe are sure that our way of living has its advantages for all.â
â Alcoholics Anonymous, p. 28
How has recovery changed the way I liveâand how can I carry those gifts into my actions, relationships, and choices today?
Recovery changes how I show up in ALL the ways. I am not who I used to be. Iâve changed in many ways, and itâs all for the better. Some struggle with that and thatâs ok, because I am good with me finally.
I do feel SO lucky because this program could help so many people, and Iâm fortunate to be one who gets to work it. I feel it could truly help anyone to live a better way of life, but itâs the reason Iâm grateful to be an alcoholic. I got a new lease on life when I surrendered to this program and my life continues to change, thanks to it. This gratitude has my heart full this morning!
[quote=âMandiH, post:1534, topic:176652â]
âWe donât recover overnight. Weâre not cured. But we have a daily reprieve based on the maintenance of our spiritual condition.â
â Alcoholics Anonymous, adapted from p. 85
What am I doing todayâjust todayâto care for my spiritual condition? Am I staying connected, honest, and open?
[/quote] It is only in last week I have understood this. For almost all my life, I just fought, coz that is what I knew, was stuck in the fight mode as I was stuck in pain and avoidance of pain. I could not And I could not fake acceptance. I had to truly understand and feel my powerlessness.. went through denial and then working on slowly letting go. It takes time.
Humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings.
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 70
The subject of humility is a difficult one. Humility is not thinking less of myself than I ought to; it is acknowledging that I do certain things well, it is accepting a compliment graciously.
God can only do for me what He can do through me. Humility is the result of knowing that God is the doer, not me. In the light of this awareness, how can I take pride in my accomplishments? I am an instrument and any work I seem to be doing is being done by God through me. I ask God on a daily basis to remove my shortcomings, in order that I may more freely go about my A.A. business of âlove and service.â
âWe try to carry this message to alcoholics and to practice these principles in all our affairs.â
â Alcoholics Anonymous, p. 60 (Step Twelve)
Where can I carry the message todayânot just in words, but in kindness, honesty, and service?
This quote reminds us that recovery isnât something we just talk about, itâs something we live in ALL areas of our life. We help those who are in it with us and share together. And, the new version of us impacts the world in far better ways in all of life that we touch. Itâs truly a gift.
. . . when we have taken a square look at some of these defects, have discussed them with another, and have become willing to have them removed, our thinking about humility commences to have a wider meaning.
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 74
When situations arise which destroy my serenity, pain often motivates me to ask God for clarity in seeing my part in the situation. Admitting my powerlessness, I humbly pray for acceptance. I try to see how my character defects contributed to the situation. Could I have been more patient? Was I intolerant? Did I insist on having my own way? Was I afraid? As my defects are revealed, I put self-reliance aside and humbly ask God to remove my shortcomings. The situation may not change, but as I practice exercising humility, I enjoy the peace and serenity which are the natural benefits of placing my reliance in a power greater than myself.
A great turning point in our lives came when we sought for humility as something we really wanted, rather than as something we must have.
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 75
Either the A.A. way of life becomes one of joy or I return to the darkness and despair of alcoholism. Joy comes to me when my attitude concerning God and humility turns to one of desire rather than of burden. The darkness in my life changes to radiant light when I arrive at the realization that being truthful and honest in dealing with my inventory results in my life being filled with serenity, freedom, and joy. Trust in my Higher Power deepens, and the flush of gratitude spreads through my being. I am convinced that being humble is being truthful and honest in dealing with myself and God. It is then that humility is something I âreally want,â rather than being âsomething I must have.â
âThe main problem of the alcoholic centers in his mind, rather than in his body.â
â Alcoholics Anonymous, p. 23
How is my thinking affecting my peace today? Am I willing to pause, pray, or share instead of letting old thought patterns lead me?
Today I will watch for opportunities to shift my mindset and live in acceptance instead of frustration or fear. I am peaceful this morning, but that has the ability to change at work today lol. I am grateful for the reminder.
For without some degree of humility, no alcoholic can stay sober at all. . . . Without it, they cannot live to much useful purpose, or, in adversity, be able to summon the faith that can meet any emergency.
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 70
Why do I balk at the word âhumilityâ? I am not humbling myself toward other people, but toward God, as I understand Him. Humility means âto show submissive respect,â and by being humble I realize I am not the center of the universe. When I was drinking, I was consumed by pride and self-centeredness. I felt the entire world revolved around me, that I was master of my destiny. Humility enables me to depend more on God to help me overcome obstacles, to help me with my own imperfections, so that I may grow spiritually. I must solve more difficult problems to increase my proficiency and, as I encounter lifeâs stumbling blocks, I must learn to overcome them through Godâs help. Daily communion with God demonstrates my humility and provides me with the realization that an entity more powerful than I is willing to help me if I cease trying to play God myself.
âWe are not saints. The point is, that we are willing to grow along spiritual lines.â
â Alcoholics Anonymous, p. 60
Am I being gentle with myself today while still staying willing to grow? What does spiritual progressânot perfectionâlook like for me right now?
I am not flawless not perfect, yet Iâm so much better than Iâve ever been. Iâm always a work in progress. Today I will be gentle on myself while I allow my body to heal and give it what it needs, I will connect to my HP, to my recovery and if thatâs all I manage to do today, thatâs ok! Perfection isnât real anyway itâs just a perception and usually itâs to please others or because I donât think Iâm worthy as I am. Iâm good with slow progress today.
As long as we placed self-reliance first, a genuine reliance upon a Higher Power was out of the question. That basic ingredient of all humility, a desire to seek and do Godâs will, was missing.
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 72
When I first came to A.A., I wanted to find some of the elusive quality called humility. I didnât realize I was looking for humility because I thought it would help me get what I wanted, and that I would do anything for others if I thought God would somehow reward me for it. I try to remember now that the people I meet in the course of my day are as close to God as I am ever going to get while on this earth. I need to pray for knowledge of Godâs will today, and see how my experience with hope and pain can help other people; if I can do that, I donât need to search for humility, it has found me.
As long as we placed self-reliance first, a genuine reliance upon a Higher Power was out of the question. That basic ingredient of all humility, a desire to seek and do Godâs will, was missing.
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 72
I had something called self-will run riot. And where did I end up with that? In horrible relationships, being used and abused by others and myself. It lead to daily drinking and blackouts. And me being completely isolated. In other words, no where good. But I was afraid to give that up. I started making improvements but couldnât fathom handing over the reigns to a HP I wasnât even sure I believed existed. However, when I finally realized my way wasnât working, even in sobriety as all of it continued to repeat except the drinking, I decided Iâd try it and also joined AA. It was the BEST thing Iâve ever done. My life has changed in alllllll the best ways, I just had to get myself out of the way and finally stop thinking I knew what was best. My HP is precisely what I needed to stop living the way I was, now I canât imagine living without it and Iâm grateful!
Where humility had formerly stood for a forced feeding on humble pie, it now begins to mean the nourishing ingredient which can give us serenity.
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 74
How often do I focus on my problems and frustrations? When I am having a âgood dayâ these same problems shrink in importance and my preoccupation with them dwindles. Wouldnât it be better if I could find a key to unlock the âmagicâ of my âgood daysâ for use on the woes of my âbad days?â
I already have the solution! Instead of trying to run away from my pain and wish my problems away, I can pray for humility! Humility will heal the pain. Humility will take me out of myself. Humility, that strength granted to me by that âpower greater than myself,â is mine for the asking! Humility will bring balance back into my life. Humility will allow me to accept my humanness joyously.
âWe donât regret the past nor wish to shut the door on it.â
â Alcoholics Anonymous, p. 83 (The Promises)
How can I use my past experiencesâno matter how painfulâas a source of strength, service, or compassion today?
(NOTE: ANYONE CAN USE THE PROMPTS TO REFELCT ON HERE OR ANYWAY YOU CHOSE TO, I FIND THEM VERY HELPFUL PERSONALLY )
Not regretting my past has been a challenge for me. Sometimes I wish it was different or wish I had been different. The thing is, I am who I am now because of who I have been. I have had to do a ton of self-forgiveness and actually give that old version of me a whole lot of love. She did the best she could where she was at and thatâs truly what sheâs always needed the most. Love. Not condemnation, judgement, etc. Just love. Thatâs been a transformational blessing for me in my sobriety and I am grateful for that today.
For thousands of years we have been demanding more than our share of security, prestige, and romance. When we seemed to be succeeding, we drank to dream still greater dreams. When we were frustrated, even in part, we drank for oblivion. Never was there enough of what we thought we wanted.
In all these strivings, so many of them well-intentioned, our crippling handicap had been our lack of humility. We had lacked the perspective to see that character-building and spiritual values had to come first, and that material satisfactions were not the purpose of living.
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 71
Time and again I approached the Seventh Step, only to fall back and regroup. Something was missing and the impact of the Step escaped me. What had I overlooked? A single word: read but ignored, the foundation of all the Steps, indeed the entire Alcoholics Anonymous program â that word is âhumbly.â
I understood my shortcomings: I constantly put tasks off; I angered easily; I felt too much self-pity; and I thought, why me? Then I remembered, âPride goeth before the fall,â and I eliminated pride from my life.
âThe spiritual life is not a theory. We have to live it.â
â Alcoholics Anonymous, p. 83
Am I walking the walk today, not just talking the talk? What small action can I take to align my behavior with my spiritual values?
There are times I want to rest on my laurels. Just focus on what I need to do next without involving my HP. And thatâs how I take my own will back and things often fall to shit that way. Everything I do, I do better when I invite my HP in. Iâm grateful for the reminder to do that today in ALL of my affairs.
In every case, pain had been the price of admission into a new life. But this admission price had purchased more than we expected. It brought a measure of humility, which we soon discovered to be a healer of pain.
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 75
It was painful to give up trying to control my life, even though success eluded me, and when life got too rough, I drank to escape. Accepting life on lifeâs terms will be mastered through the humility I experience when I turn my will and my life over to the care of God, as I understand Him. With my life in Godâs care, fear, uncertainty, and anger are no longer my response to those portions of life that I would rather not have happen to me. The pain of living through these times will be healed by the knowledge that I have received the spiritual strength to survive.
âWe are sure that our new way of living has its advantages.â
â Alcoholics Anonymous, p. 84
What giftâsmall or largeâhas this new way of life brought me recently? Am I taking time to notice and appreciate it today?
Man, everything in my life has changed by living it this new way. Sometimes itâs uncomfortable and even painful for me to go through the process of continuing to change my life for the better. But after the rain, thatâs when I find the rainbows and life shines even brighter than before. The advantages of this life and allllll of the beauty itâs brought to me is innumerable and my heart is full of love and gratitude today because of it.
My stability came out of trying to give, not out of demanding that I receive.
Thus I think it can work out with emotional sobriety. If we examine every disturbance we have, great or small, we will find at the root of it some unhealthy dependency and its consequent unhealthy demand. Let us, with Godâs help, continually surrender these hobbling demands. Then we can be set free to live and love; we may then be able to Twelfth Step ourselves and others into emotional sobriety.
THE LANGUAGE OF THE HEART, p. 238
Years of dependency on alcohol as a chemical mood-changer deprived me of the capability to interact emotionally with my fellows. I thought I had to be self-sufficient, self-reliant, and self-motivated in a world of unreliable people. Finally I lost my self-respect and was left with dependency, lacking any ability to trust myself or to believe in anything. Surrender and self-examination while sharing with newcomers helped me to ask humbly for help.
