So far so good, this run feels like the one for me, my longest time sober was 110 days, but it felt forced, felt like I was forcing myself not to drink and waiting for a magical day while counting the days where I would feel “normal” without cravings. So after my relapse I realised I have to come to terms with the fact that nothing magical will happen with waiting, you have to accept the fact that you’re an alcoholic and one drink is too much and 100 is not enough, somehow this simple understanding has helped me as of now, I treat it like an allergy, if a person is allergic to nuts he won’t eat them right? same for me with alcohol, if I want to continue living and enjoying life without any health issues or mental issues I just simply can’t drink.
Even after today which was a shit day I didn’t even think about grabbing a bottle, I failed my drivers test for the 4th time (initially lost my license to DUI of course, no surprise there) I didn’t bring myself down, i just said to myself well better luck next time.
Somehow I’ve found a new level of motivation to remain sober and to improve my life, I’ve had enough of hurting my loved ones and my body, I’ve had enough of going to hospitals and psych wards, I’ve had enough of withdrawals and DT’s seeing all kinds of fucked up shit, I’ve realised alcohol gives me nothing positive, it just destroys me, and lies to me that if i pick up that bottle it’ll be fun, time and time again it has been proven to be a lie, a lie that my own brain creates.
stay positive folks.
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This is a great share. Thanks! Congrats on 20 days too. I love the allergy analogy. I am sticking with that too.
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Nice read congrats on your method of quitting we are all different in the way we approach things.stay strong:+1:
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