Gray area Bing drinker here 
hi everyone! I’m the type who drinks once a week but always blacks out. Since I don’t drink daily it doesn’t take much… I started taking my sobriety seriously in 2018. I’ve been able to hit 47 days but that’s my max. It’s hard because ppl don’t see the problem…but I feel it. Anyways…Friday is looming and Saturday. I need to get through a full weekend. 
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Have you thought about starting an AA program? I think you could benefit at least reading more and doing some research on recovery for yourself. There are tons of people and threads to learn from in here.
I want you to know you don’t need to feel alone, it took me 2 years of constant relapsing to be able to get past a couple days. You’re trying and you’ve accepted the problem just please don’t stop trying and please continue to help yourself, you know its a problem and you can make a difference in your life I promise
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I’ve been reading a lot of books on sobriety and it’s helping. I’m scared to go to a meeting for some reason. Tomorrow is Friday and I’m going to try and listen to my thoughts and really try to see my triggers.
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Thank you so much. I made it through today.
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If it helps I have never been to one, I’m not an AA member just a lone soldier, sometimes having a little faith in yourself does help, if you believe in yourself anything is possible
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