Here’s the best I can do in a nutshell:
9 months ago I out down the bottle but quickly replaced it with my DOC. My wife had had enough and I moved back to my parents to sober up. It worked for a bit but didnt stick so I stuck it out at my parents place while paying for my wife and kids to live at our home. It never bothered me until tonight.
6 days ago my DOC put me in the hospital and I barely escaped with my life. I woke up at my parent’s place in full withdrawal, extremely depressed, and more shameful than I could ever begin to explain. Since this happened, my wife has not call me once, nor did she come to see me in the hospital, which was a 2 minute drive from her work.
Tonight my 9 year old daughter calls me to talk and I can hear all sorts of laughter and banter and such in the background. My daughter says that mommy is having other hockey parents over for after game drinks. She tells me there’s about 20 people over.
Now I’m pretty upset so I text her to say that it’s not cool that I’m in hell emotionally and you’re having a party at our house, which I havent lived in but helped pay for for the last 9 months.
I stewed with this for an hour and decided to drive over, which I knew wasnt a smart choice, but I know if I didnt, I would have drank or used something to suppress my feelings. So I went over and everyone was gone except for a couple sleepover kids and my wife who was sleeping in bed. She heard me come in and asked what I was doing. I told her to check her texts and that i was leaving.
She read her text and got upset because I made the choices that put me where i am and she and the kids deserve to have fun.
To this I 100% agree with, but the part that gets me is that it was in my home while I’m in the most fragile position I’ve been in my life. The time I need her the most is the time i hear about the party.
My last text told her that from my perspective, she is done with me, so just come out and say it instead of stringing me along 9 months with me hoping I could come back. I told her I felt that she has abandoned me at the time I most need her and the kids (especially the kids) and if there is no hope for me to come home clean and sober, than put the house for sale.
She replied upset and thinks I’m losing my mind - which could be the case lol. She called my parents telling them that I may be a safety risk to myself.
Am I way out of line here? Having a party while I’m thinking I’m going through hell to get my life and family back felt like a slap in the face.The only thing I maybe shouldn’t have done is put her on the spot about selling the house and deciding about us, but I’m exhausted and frustrated. She needs to tell me I think.
Sorry for the rant I’m new here. Admins, if this isnt appropriate, please remove, I’m just glad I typed it out.