Was thinking… I accidentally came across this workbook (DBT) for people with borderline and couldn’t help noticing similarities between this disorder and people, like myself, that have been taking drugs for so many years that I forgot how to be ‘normal’ (like handle feelings, everyday life and so on…).
Have any of you experience working with this approach?
Long shot, I know…
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What is DBT?
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DBT - Dialectical behavior therapy… For instance, if one lack patience in a supermarket que and it feels unbearable, one could get a exercise which suggests that you switch your focus… For instance, what are people wearing, whats in their baskets and so on…
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Thanks a lot. I appreciate it… Both your time answering and for welcoming me!
Welcome Daria! I have not tried DBT but it has peaked my interest after seeing others mentioning it here on the forum.
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I’m doing another form of therapy aimed at helping people with BPD (among others) called schema therapy. Extremely helpful to me and many connections to addiction. There’s a book called ‘reinventing your life’ by the psychologist who designed schema therapy, Yeffrey Young, that’s aimed at everybody, and draws on the same principles as the therapy does. Might be worth looking into too. Welcome to TS!
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Also working on the acronym A.C.C.E.P.T.S helps and is full circle with soothing senses.
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I started DBT at the beginning of the year and I have been struggling with it the whole time. There is no wisemind between my two ears. I do my best at participating but I don’t feel like I fit into my group. I feel like the homework is emotionally exhausting and if I do it I fill it in half assed. My mind must really be screwed up because I think that most of the stuff in this book is fuckin stupid. So far I just can’t get my brain to work this way. I don’t want to give up. I hope that this stuff makes sense to me soon because right now I just feel like I’m lying to myself. I hate having broken brains.
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I don’t know anything about this therapy so this probably won’t help, but something you said stuck out to me.
If you hear the same thing over and over, eventually you begin to believe it. So, you know, ‘fake it til you make it’? In a sense, you actually are lying to yourself, but it’s to correct a part of you that may have believed a lie to begin with. Lies from another, or just as possibly, lies from yourself.
My personal example is how the way my ex treated me for so long made me actually believe what he was saying was true. His negativity rubbed off and I began to think of myself like that. It tooks years to reverse the damage, but I stayed persistent and as positive as possible. Maybe your brain isn’t broken. Maybe it’s just been lied to all this time 
My perspective 
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I understand what you are saying and thank you. I am committed to what I’m doing and won’t give in. I’ve just been pretty confused lately and I don’t like that feeling.
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DBT saved my life, personally.
As someone with BPD, CBT never worked for me and I was always angry and anxious with the “think on the bright side” bs - I lost my mother at 18, there was no bright side.
It will work, even if you find yourself regurgitating it at others, but not yourself.
I know this is an old post, but I hope you get the help you need.
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Yeah. @Just_Laura has some good thoughts there.
This kinda thing is hard. Getting sober this time, I threw myself into anything I wasn’t already trying. Cuz, like, my old thinking and old feelings were clearly not working.
And it feels really weird at first, and uncomfortable. But uncomfortable also means growth!
It’s like going to the gym. That first couple months sucks as we build new muscles we didn’t have. Little by little though, we get stronger.
That doesn’t make it easy. I can say though, eventually it works and it can almost feel like magic. This week I’ve been kinda shocked how I’ve had some life stuff I’d normally go through the roof about. Somehow though, my thoughts and feelings about it have stayed centered. I just look at it differently now. I’m okay with how things are even though in the past I would’ve fought about it.
It’s so surreal to take a step back and notice that. But it’s a very welcome and positive change. Cuz for sure, my old thinking only made me miserable and prone to picking up to boot!
Trust, friend! You’re going places…
Related, an awesome picture @SoberWalker shared today:
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No one likes feeling confused, but all of us have at one point or another. It could be that it’s starting to work and you’re beginning to change, but you can’t comprehend that yet. I’m sure others in your group are feeling the exact same way. I was curious and read that this therapy takes a minimum of 6 months to a year to start showing results. Stick to your commitment and it will pay off 
As difficult as it is, sometimes patience is the answer
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I don’t remember posting here three years ago. But I did. I found the therapy I did then very tough, I felt I didn’t fit in the group, I found it emotionally (and physically) very exhausting, I felt a huge amount of resistance trying to do the homework and participating in the group.
And only after completing it (after 60 afternoon sessions that took the better part of two years to complete), and following up with another form of group therapy -trauma therapy aimed at reconnecting body and mind- did I see what I gained and learned. and how I changed.
It’s hard work. But you have a goal set right. Keep your eyes on the price. You’re there to change the way your brain works. To learn new stuff. Keep working your stuff friend. And talk about your doubts and struggles too. It all helps. 
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@Just_Laura @Lile01 @Eke @Mno
My post kinda just started out as venting a bit, but the feedback I got was very much appreciated. I thought about what was said for the rest of the afternoon and about what I was doing. I guess I just don’t feel as excited about this as I do with addiction therapy(addiction therapy saved my life so it has a special place in my heart forever). I don’t think I was going to quit. I do think that I need to put more effort towards the program and my homework. I’m willing to try harder and so I will. Once again I appreciate you guys and I feel less frustrated about DBT for now. Thanks Friends 
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