Debt In Sobriety

So for a good 11 years of my life I drank to cope with my circumstances living under the roof of a family member that truly didn’t want me,no guidance to navigate my teen yrs,making decisions to fit in with peers all that to say now as a well I feel like a lost big kid/adult for the lack of better words I’m now facing a nice debt for a credit card I regret but got before I got sober and I feel all I’ve done this year is stress myself out and the movies and treating myself was the one night I wasn’t stressed :smiling_face_with_tear: and this morning I feel heavy and I hear often it gets better in sobriety I feel I need so much prayer or whatever because I do want to feel hopeful in my recovery moving forward because I know I can do it !

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I have debt also from a few different sources. Maybe u can relate, but debt is like a black cloud that just follows me wherever i go lol im in my first year of recovery and i have begun making financial amends and that is the only thing that is easing that black cloud and that feeling of financial despair. With my credit card i have actually spoken to the bank and they had ways to assist me in being able to work on paying it off. For example i was able to apply for a lower interest rate, that way more of my money is going to the actual bill instead of the interest. This has helped me so far. Also, i had to sit down and make a budget to see where my money is actually going. I started to be abit more frugal and tried picking up more shifts at work. It seems daunting paying back large amounts of money but just plug away at it month by month. The feeling is soo rewarding not having that on our backs.

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Im also in a similar boat with finances due to overspending and getting credit while i was drinking, what ive noticed recently is alot more help is available from companies to assist with repaying debts, they would much rather they came up with a payment plan than you not pay at all, here in England we are having a cost of living crisis so alot more help is around, my advice is to be honest and check with whoever you have credit with because as Butterfly said they may be able to lower interest etc…there may be options you didnt know were there…congrats on your sobriety and just remember this way your starting to sort it out rather than heading deeper into debt, your doing great :+1:

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the way my day started and now I’m cracking up laughing at life just a little hectic couldn’t find my socks found a pair than found a pair in my car than realize I needed gas​:rofl:than drove past the subway entrance to than pull back order seemed a little rushed I degress the credit card I have is now going to a creditor because for 9 months before sobriety I didn’t take life seriously and worked at a hotel where I could drink on the job and the money I made went toward all the wrong thing’s :upside_down_face:

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I was at a slightly different place when I got sober. I spent most of my life skirting debt to barely get by. Put myself through college. Trashed my credit in the process. When I got sober I was clinging to a career that certainly paid the bills, but was still buried under student debt.

Something changed subtly when I found recovery though. As I worked my program my attitude shifted more toward being of service to others. Just trying to do the next right thing, including on the job.

I worked with my boss who, when I came clean, gave me more responsibility which baffled me. But I took a deep breath and stepped up. He gave me more training and I soaked it up.

Money-wise, the money I was saving just from not drinking and related habits made the difference to not feeling like I was in a pinch anymore. (Seriously, how’d I even pay the rent?) And over time the better contributions I started making at work led to some surprisingly generous financial recognition. I put it toward aggressively paying back the loans.

It took a few years at least, but for the first time in a lifetime, I’m recently completely debt free! Even have a comfortable savings now.

Honestly it still feels so strange after a lifetime of insecurity. Part of me is always waiting for the other shoe to drop. But I just try to get up each day and repeat the better things I had done the day before. And everything seems like it almost takes care of itself now. At least financially.

Even if things do fall apart unexpectedly, I remember I’m sober, I’m in a good place now, and surrounded by good people. It’ll be ok!

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This! I guess my lessons learned so far were really the basics.

Know your budget and try to live within your means. Have some cash on hand for emergencies but push towards returning debts. Show up for the job and just do the best you can, being of service to others.

And above all, we gotta be patient. It’ll probably take time and that’s ok. Just keep moving in the right direction. You’ll get there.

(The suggestions to talk to your creditors are good too! They may be able to work something out. Your local community may also offer services for financial counseling to make sense of it all.)

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Coming into the New Year I made a list of everything I owe anyone so I can see it all at once and hopefully cross some off. I piled on $30,000 of credit card debt in my drinking years. I am much more responsible with money sober but climbing out of debt is a battle.

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When i stopped drinking the tax man came looking as i had to give up my three companies in England now i was back in Scotland living with my parents £68 k was owed but after my divorce i managed to clear some of it and the rest i paid off over the years as i got sober , but i had started another two companies now i was sober and had a bad accountant and the vat man came looking for 56K and i was 22 years sober at that time but i managed to clear it in a couple years , since that time my wife and i moved a few times and our 200k mortgage got paid off . Today we have a big house no mortgage money in the bank plenty of holiday every year so the moral is drinking or sober you could still get into financial difficulties, my Aunt passed away this month and i was left her estate which is pretty penny but i wasnt expecting anything im giving some off it to my sons get them on the housing market and out of the house lol

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Please do try to contact your creditors or a credit counseling service for help. Google credit counseling service for different organizations that may be able to help you. Credit.org is a nonprofit credit counseling service in the U.S. If your account(s) haven’t already then turned over to collections, you very well may be able to set up a plan to avoid that. And even if they have been turned over to collections, there are steps you can take to lessen that blow credit wise. I hate making those type of phone calls but they usually turn out to be very helpful. Especially if you speak to the right person, they truly want to help you. If you get someone who isn’t helpful, try again. Wishing you all the best. And great job on your sobriety.

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Thank you everyone for taking out your time to really give so much encouragement telling me your experiences it’s all so helpful and very much appreciated with what I’ve gathered just showing up for myself and doing my best each day things will start to work themselves out and I won’t give up on myself I’m gonna kick butt in the new year! I’ll also have 5 months next month I’m so grateful for that :pray:t6:!!!also update on my day laugh is really funny after the chaos to work I fell down at work so I’m spending the new year soar but sober so Happy new years to all us badasses in recovery and lot’s of love to anyone struggling :heart::smiling_face_with_tear:

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There’s a lot to take in in sobriety,

Ahh good ole debt, I have it lots of it too, In my career I made probably close to a million dollars, and I pissed It away, racked up debt and In sobriety I didn’t stop with debt I had to get better at managing my finances, it’s like sobriety gotta work on it daily

I will suggest Dave Ramesy as a good starting point, I’m not a fan of his religious views and such if you can get past that he does provide sound advice on building a budget and getting out of debt, I also don’t buy into his credit cards are the enemy, but his get out of debt approach is good info

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You got that right there is a lot to take in and my patience is the one flaw I have to work through because I feel I should be further ahead and feel I’m making progress but not at the pace I would like but I realize life isn’t like a microwave instantaneous. I’m gonna give my best because I know I can withstand🙏🏿

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Time is linear and so is progress,

I’m an inpatient instantaneous person as well, I remember in Detox, I was impatient but when cause I want now

My SAC said to me look around, take it in, your used to everything being chaos, you might not think it but you are right where you need to be, he had this tattoo of a hourglass and he always pointed to it, and it said Time, everytime I got impatient he would touch it and say time, I’m surprised he didn’t wear it off just talking to me

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Got that one too. Saying I felt weirdly bored.

“Are you bored, or just used to dealing with constant crisis?”

Bored a pretty good problem by comparison.

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The best way to alleviate the anxiety over your debt is to take action. Get on a beans and rice budget and start chunking away. You’ll feel better as the balance declines, and soon enough You’ll be debt free. Then you can really enjoy life knowing you don’t owe anyone any money. Listen to the Dave Ramsey podcast for motivation.

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Thank you will be adding and listening to his podcast !!:heart:

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I agree I knew you were a listener when you said beans and rice diet

But it’s true you feel better as the wallet gets fatter, and less money goes out every month

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I teach the FPU course at my church. We followed the program starting in 2009 and by 2014 were debt free except for the mortgage. That got paid off in 2019. Now everything we own, including out mountain top is paid off.

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Yes, I can’t add much more than everyone else, but find some credit counselor. Dave Ramsey is great. I read “Get out of Debt and Stay out of Debt …” when I first started my recovery.
It took some time, but I’m debtfree now with savings.
Calling creditors helped me, too.
You can do it. :unicorn:

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