I’ve got a decent amount of clean time. I’m not trying to jump into any relationship right now. But I’d be lying if I said that I haven’t been talking to this girl recently and for the first time in my life it was healthy, she cares, I care, so much in common etc. and I was in a 10 year abusive relationship with my baby’s mom and it destroyed me and my heart. I’ve grown from that, but the little hiccup or whatever you wanna call it that’s came up between me and this girl, as I said I really really like wholeheartedly, has got me feeling similar stuff that I did when I felt all the heartbreak before. I’m still focusing on my recovery and myself fully, so is she, and we have the mutual understanding that our own recovery comes first. But with her ex coming back around and he used to beat her and treat her like straight shit is fucking with her head bc she’s afraid to tell him no. And if she goes back to him then it’s out of my control I’m powerless over it just like my addiction. It just hurts to know that she may end up being back in the abusive situations that she told me she hated so much and was so happy to find a guy like me. I’m just looking for some advice, would definitely like some from a females perspective that has been in the same kinda situation(s) before please and thank you everyone!! Love that I can vent and talk on here I love you all and give yourself a pat on the back for waking up today sober 
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Jonathon, I don’t have any answers, but I just want you to know I care.
You said it yourself that your sobriety comes first, and I’m glad you have that perspective. The future is unpredictable, and it’s understandable there is some fear that this person you’ve come to care about may go back to an abusive relationship. But she may not. In any case, you are right, you don’t have any control over what will happen. If she knows you care and are supportive, that’s about all you can do. Sending you strength and peace of mind.
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