Depression and relapse thoughts

Ive recently been going through a depression. I lost my job with no notice or fault on my behalf early this week, boss just said he ran out of money and wouldnt be able to pay me anymore. Ive been sober for over 4 months now and i find myself constantly thinking about sneaking off to buy some alcohol and drown my sorrows… i havent yet but its like this little voice that wont go away, my family is 100 percent behind my soberiety and would devastate them if i relapsed hence the reason to sneak, i just need some help/advice to get through this difficult time especially with Christmas coming up.

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Sorry to hear that you’re having a bad time!
What often helps me is to remind myself that no matter how shitty my situation is, it’s gonna absolutely 100 percent get even shittier if I choose to drink.
Drinking is not helping. It’s just the addiction whispering that, trying to convince me. But it’s really not.
However there are things that help. Talking about my feelings with a friend, going for a walk, cleaning my apartment… doing things that take off the tension and bring me forward. E.g. a clean room that I feel good (or at least a bit better) in. Feeling usefull.
If I don’t feel able to do anything like that, I numb myself. I try not to do this too often. But if it’s a really dark day or even kind emergency-ish. Then a pizza and ice cream and an action movie helpme to distract myself.
Hope this helps. Hope you’re doing OK and get through this challenging time.

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Just remember, everything is worse with alcohol. My whole life is better without it. All my PTSD stuff is a lot worse with it and my behaviour is a lot worse too.

Whatever you are going through I’ve found being sober makes the worst things easier. Not easy. Easier.

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Thanks for the advice! And yes i keep thinking about what would happen if i did drink and it wouldnt solve my problems but just make it worse

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Alcohol is fuel on the fire for depression. Remember how you felt when you started this journey. You wanted to be in the position you are now when you started. Imagine how many more strides you can make if you stay the course.

Christmas is stressful and a rough time to be sober in a world of drinkers, especially with a brain full of challenging thoughts. Think how much worse it could be if you take those steps back. I’m pulling for you. Don’t go backwards.

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Glad you came here instead of sneaking off! There’s so much love here for you, you’re not alone. I’ve faced a lot of adversity in my life and resorted to alcohol to cope with it in the past. Since becoming a head sports coach I’ve learned a lot about myself and how to deal with adversity without alcohol. I quickly learned that to be a good coach I couldn’t just tell my players how to live right I had to model it for them. In times of adversity I had to be the calming presence to help them see the world didn’t stop turning because things aren’t looking good. That we have to get up and keep going even when it looks dark and daunting. I started looking at my life in the same manner. On the days things didn’t go right, I could easily go pull up a stool at the bar and no one would stop me. But I also recognized it’s a choice. On one hand I could choose to go and do something I know turns me into a version of myself that’s unrecognizable. On the other hand I could choose to be the best version of myself because I love myself and I love all the people in my life that I am important to even if the world is pissing on my boots. The world is always gonna piss on your boots from time to time, the question is what do you choose to do in that moment? You are loved and are important! Sorry for the novel but I believe you’re one good decision away from great things in your life, even if you can’t see them from where you’re standing right now.

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One day sober is just as rewarding as 346 or 1000, they’re all treasures of their own because each day we live is special and a gift! Also, you are correct the sleep is so much better sober!

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