This is my first time posting on this site, I’m very upset,yesterday I drank and used after a dealer calling me on my Snapchat that I had told I was getting clean and sober. So diddent think he would have called. I was 22 days sober trying to get to 30 days. so I could start my step work, I was doing everything suggested and still used, I just can never get to thirty days, I feel awful today and im just trying to cope with that and getting back to my meetings, i feel In one day everything’s gone terribly wrong. I’ve got no energy and im missing that feeling of being clean
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Today is a new day and your 22 days is not lost. Remember how you feel now, disappointed, and use that to fuel you forward. Today is a new day. 
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All you can do is start again, with more conviction, more determination, and using more tools to stay sober and clean. Wishing you well!
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Stop. Breathe. Forgive yourself. Disappointment, shame and guilt are all negative feelings that will only fester in you. You’ve gotten 22 days before, you can do it again. Learn from what happened, evolve with it and move forward. Youve been given a gift to teach yourself another way, no one here is perfect and every single one of us stumbled somewhere down the road, its what we choose to do next that matters. You’ve got this.
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Pick yourself up and start again. Don’t let your addiction win. Throw away everything associated with your addiction and discard all connections with it. Delete all social media, phone numbers and disassociate from friends or family members involved with your addiction. You are in recovery mode, take charge and feel focused and empowered and commit yourself to getting better. Good luck, you can get through this!
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Be kind to yourself. Annie Grace calls these ‘data points’. There’s something to learn from it and keep going. The main thing is you’re back here instead of giving into it and keeping on going (which I’ve done). Sending you strength.
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You can do this but only if you decide to try again. Start with today. If just today you can put a sober head on a pillow at night you are on your way. Keep repeating until it becomes a pattern. You’ve got this!
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I always like to use sports analogies since I’m a sports guy. No team is ever really perfect, there are always wins and losses. Choosing to step on the field means you accept that there will be days where things just don’t go right. Although the goal in sobriety is a continuous streak of winning days, nearly everyone has had a moment in their journey where one gets chalked up in the L column. But that doesn’t mean you quit, you learn from it and how you can beat it next time around when that situation presents itself again. That’s why in sports we review game footage and charts, and we breakdown what happened and teach athletes how to recognize and alter the outcome next time so that we have a greater likelihood of ending up in the win column the next time. No coach ever got to 500 wins without some losses, let’s learn from this and keep it in our tool belt for next time! 
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A dealer is only out for one thing… To continue making money. They don’t care, Infact… They don’t want you sober because then they need to find another reliable source.
My recommendation is to delete your account on any avenues you use to contact dealers and then uninstall those apps. If a mobile smartphone makes it too easy for you to get your DOC, get rid of the smartphone.
This change is on you to make, no one else can force you or convince you. There is going to always be external forces working against your progress, and your commitment to dive deep into your recovery will be the only thing that can prepare you and equip you to eventually say no to something like this.
Congratulations on deciding to return and start again, this is the commitment that you can grow with. You deserve this change and this life, wouldn’t you agree?
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Itll get better, youl get to 30 days. People,places, and things
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Let go of things that BIND YOU
Empty bottles of booze
No new items
Stop Using
If all that means stop
if you sunburn, use a hat or sunscreen
Uninstall snap shat
Myself, i removed tiktok because of temptation of self harm
Remove from your life what drags you backwards
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What is done is done, you cannot change the past. Getting back to the meetings, putting in more thought, more effort, will help you get back on track. It only has to stick once to stick forever. 
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Your line, ‘missing that feeling of being clean’ is a good way of putting it for relapse periods. It’s one of the quickest things you can get back though.
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Love this needed to read this!
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Hey thanks sassy rocks, I’m feeling in a better place and just focusing on the day ahead. I’m coming back stronger and with more wisdom about my triggers. I am carrying on as I normally would if I hadent relapsed but using that guilt and shame to push through
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Thank you for checking in! Glad you are feeling a bit better. 