I’m curious to know, how many people on here have felt the need to disclose the fact that they’re in recovery? Has it helped you to let those close to you know? My own addiction hasn’t escalated so that it’s hurt anyone but myself so a lot of the times I feel like it’s no one else’s business. But that might not be healthy because we’re only as sick as our secrets, right?
3 Likes
I told my wife. Like you I really haven’t hurt anyone, had no DWI’s, no one would ever suspect my problems with alcohol but I know the truth. Alcohol has become a liability and a risk that threatens to take all I hold dear. Without it I am guaranteed to stay safe and be the best that I can be everyday. I confided in my wife, who already thought I was an alcoholic. However, she was surprised to hear me admit it. She thought I was an alcoholic, but after I told her about all the drinking she didnt see plus my anxiety trying to quit then she knew for sure. It helps to keep me accountable and it felt good to get it off my chest. I told her I didn’t want anyone else to know though, and also mentioned to her that I would be looking into AA as well.
4 Likes
Yes it helps alot. I don’t tell everyone but i m often surprised by how many folks have quit or had problems. Seems to make for a closer bond.
3 Likes
Thanks for sharing, @FreshOffDenial! The relief that comes with confessing is always a plus. So it being accountable to someone.
2 Likes
I think recovery is as private as you want it to be. I’ll tell anyone who asks me if I want a drink that I simply don’t drink anymore. If they assume that means I’m an alcoholic and choose to somehow look down on me I could care less. My closest friends and family know I’ve quit. If they ask why I’m not ashamed to tell them it has become a problem for me and I’m much better off without it. I can tell you what was embarrassing though. Getting an extreme DUI in 2001 and then again in 2009. Being incarcerated both times. The second for 45 days. In fact because how the conviction dates fell, I was only 8 weeks past the constituent that would have put me away for 6 months on the 2nd charge. To think I continued to drink heavily and not see a problem until years after my 2nd DUI is even scarier. Bottom line is I’ve been through a lot and don’t care much what people think, but I still feel my drinking problem is my own business and I’ll share if I see fit.
3 Likes
I’m open with not drinking but I’ve not ever said the word “alcoholic” to anyone but here. I’m kind of feeling that unless you are an alcoholic you just won’t get it. I don’t feel like dealing with people who either try to convince me I’m NOT, or people who think it is simply a case of choosing not to drink. They just don’t understand
5 Likes
@VSue
I feel the same way! I feel that unless someone is going through addiction they won’t understand. So it’s not beneficial for them or me to share.
2 Likes
I’ve told my close friends and family, but they already knew of course. I got really sloppy in the end. I reached out to others I knew that had quit, and it felt good to come clean.
As far as acquaintances and strangers are concerned I just say I don’t drink for “health reasons”, which usually stops the conversation in its tracks. No normal person would pry as to what your health problems are- and it’s the truth, drinking makes me sick and mentally unstable.
3 Likes
My family knows that I’m abstaining and trying to get “healthy.” I would never use the word “alcoholic” with my family bc several of them have issues with alcohol too. So they hear “alcoholic” and think you drink all day, pass out in the front lawn, sleep in the gutter Etc. I have only told one friend about my issues with alcohol bc she is an AODA therapist. I think I could disclose whatever to my very close friends and they would be supportive. I think one friend is considering a group like this!
3 Likes
I have only told my ex husband and my closest friend. And only that I quit drinking. They know I have always been a binge drinker and had some issues. I don’t use the term alcoholic or in recovery. I simply say I don’t drink alcohol anymore. If anybody asks why I answer honestly and say I want to be healthy and happy and drinking hasn’t helped with either, so I stopped. I have had no issues with anyone so far. I think this is very different for everyone as to what works!
2 Likes
@Deanna I think I’m in the same boat as @FreshOffDenial. I told my husband and one friend…and really I told that friend because I needed to be honest about not going on our weekly lunches anymore, which we always drank during.
I’m very selective who I tell, eventually everyone close to me will most likely know, but only when I’m ready…and not sooner.
Oh, I also told my cousin more recently and I’m glad I did. Really, I probably only needed to tell my husband to stay accountable. He’s really good at keeping me in check. 
2 Likes
Interesting topic. I feel that only the people closest to me need to know. Outside of that there is no benefit, and it would probably just cause misunderstandings and weirdness. Only my wife and two adult children know. They have been supportive and proud of my efforts. My wife is a casual wine/beer drinker, and I totally give her the freedom to, without guilt.
3 Likes
Everyone who knows me, knows. They all said that they had no idea and just thought that I was a housewife who enjoyed a couple drinks, LOL! They were very surprised to hear the truth, including how much I drank, but the support that I receive from my family and friends is extremely important for me.
3 Likes
I think boundary setting is an emportant part of recovery…so is building trust and intimacy. These things take time and a clear head. I think it’s good to share but smart to be selective about who you shave with.
I agree, it’s no ones business, however if st some point a nomment arises where it seems appropriate and or relevant and your comfortable…hell yes you should share it! While some people may not have the maturity or life experience not to judge, it’s still something you should be very proud of.
I’ve started telling people I stopped drinking without going into details, people are curious and I’m vague but honest. I’m hoping at some point I can talk about me on the drink candidly enough that people feel comfortable examining their own relationships with addictive behaviours, and understood enough to take their own first step. #recoverygoals 
1 Like