Has anybody here feel like they have no idea who they are after getting clean and sober? The feeling has been hitting me hard here lately.
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Absolutely!! My advice is to get back to basics…write an actual list of what makes you happy and start doing everything on that list more…its a great place to start…just watched Stutz on neflix too id highly recommend that aswell…
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Absolutely! I know i can relate to what ur saying. And im sure many others do also.
I started using at a fairly young age. My life revolved around drugs for decades so when i quit, i literally didnt know a thing about myself. Likes or dislikes, interests, dreams or goals, nothing 
but the fun thing about recovery is being able to doscover ourselves. I started getting to know myself by asking myself simple questions. Fav food? Fav color? Fav season? Fav tv show? Basic stuff like that. And then i began trying out new hobbies that i thought i would like. Some i enjoyed and some i didnt. It can actually be a fun experience getting to know ourselves 
enjoy the process!
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100% me. Getting sober, for me, was about relearning how to live. Once I got past the anxiety of not knowing me…I realized I should be excited…I could learn how to live, exactly how I wanted to.
I could create a better life for myself and be who I wanted to be.
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Absolutely 100%
In the before times, drinking ruled my life. My main motivation, my only motivation was to get booze, and so everything else took a backseat while booze was driving.
When I quit, I was an empty shell of a man. No job, no passion, no joy.
But the way I saw it, I was a blank slate. I could be whatever I wanted. Whatever I willed myself to be. That was exciting.
Give yourself some time, figure who you want to be, then stear yourself in that direction.
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Same here. Isolating myself as much as possible the last 50 years I have no idea how to interact in society. Feel very awkward. Hard to relearn at 70
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I posted the exact same thing man. You’re not alone in those feelings.
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Who I am in my 60s, compared to 15 year old me, when I started using…never was an adult sober. So, it is a learning experience for sure.
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I was trying to remember who had just posted this question, thanks!! Cuz it is a common and helpful one, I think.
@Addsdad78, so many of us ask this same question…who the heck am I? Especially those of us who started young and spent our whole lives…decades…using. The same question was asked recently, here is a link…
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This topic made some old feelings stir in me. So, I took pen to paper and wrote a song about it.
I’ll record and post on my music thread in the future.
Thanks @Addsdad78 for the inspiration!
20 years of drinkin’
my life, slowly sinkin’
I need to find a way
to finally give a damn
The sober life has taken
every once of stength and
now I realize
I don’t know who I am
And I breathe in meaning to my life
And I believe that someday I’ll do it right
I wake up monday morning
and without no warning
the tears start to
well up in my eyes
cuz’ life’s beautiful
it’s indisputable
The man I’ve become
I feel so alive
And I breathe in meaning to my life
And I believe that someday I’ll do it right
Ohhh I might have a chance
If I ever learn who I am
And I breathe
So much to talk about
how could I live without you
You bring purpose and joy to my life
And I breathe…
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Ahhh man. I think about this a lot, but first lets recognize something… we never asked who we are before. Sure we’d say things like “wtf am i doing?” As we reached new lows, but “who am I?” That level of personal reflection wasn’t present.
We were numb(ing)
Now we’re growing
We ran from the hard stare in the mirror and all the traumas behind it.
Now we’re courageous, not with liquid corage or fools progress, but fearful yet relentless in our goals.
We were saboteurs of ourselves and any life aside from our DOC
Now we’re exalters of decentcy, seeing even the ugliest of ourselves and the human condition with stern kindness towards a higher reality.
Idk how to define what i am or anyone else, but i think these answers will come in time and you’ll like whoever you chose to be a bit more than who you were before you ever had the awareness to ask.
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Yes. Getting sober left a wide open space I was normally filling with drugs and alcohol.
You get time back most of which is with yourself, if you haven’t been yourself in a long time it’s natural to not quite know who you are. Returning to hobbies, exercising and sitting with that feeling is a good way to approach it. You’ll start asking yourself other questions like “who have I been?” “Who do I want to be?” And start filling in the space
Congrats on your sobriety!
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