I went to London by myself to watch a live band, stayed in hotel for two nights and ended up drinking and buying drugs for three days in a row while was there, missed my 6 hour bus home so had to pay for the next one which didn’t get me home until 2am so I called into work sick today for the first time since the last time I drank. What shall I do now? As well as drinking again I wasted several hundred pounds in various bars and buying drugs, (which I also can’t afford) so now I’m in bed, paranoid and I’m only just coming back to reality and starting to panic
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Well I think coming here was a good idea at least. Surely that shows that you have some intention to get back to your sobriety. People backslide. It’s just something that happens. Now you have to set your mind to being sober again. The anxiety will fade. You had 18 months, I’m pretty sure you’ve got this!
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Try to get some sleep. Yeah you burned some money and drank and used, but it could have been worse… A lot worse. Maybe when you wake up try writing a gratitude list of all you have. And that you made it through relatively unscathed.
I’m not downplaying it at all man. It sucks for sure. Sometimes It just helps to shift our perspective.
As far as the days go. 18 months is 540 days. So that’s 540 steps forward, 3 steps back. That’s a pretty good ratio. And a miracle
Try to stay stay positive pal and get some sleep
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You’re in that really shitty, hungover/comedown, panicky phase right now. We’ve ALL been there and you have too. Don’t beat yourself up too much you’ll only make things worse. Everything is actually OK. You’ve still got your job, somewhere to live, yep you relapsed and used. So has everyone it’s not meant to be easy. Try to chill out today, you’ll feel better in a few days and ready to fight on.
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Ah Mark - I know you feel terrible and panicked. We’ve all been there. You had a slip. That didn’t take away all the hard work and progress you made in the last 18 months. You lost a date. You still have a job, your life, and all the tools and you had three days ago. You didn’t harm another person. Don’t worry about anything today except getting some rest and feeling better. I’ll bet you’ve blown a bunch of money before and come back from it; I sure have.
You came back here and were honest and accountable about what you did. That’s what’s important now. When you feel more stable you can figure out why it happened. For now, be good to yourself. Know that everyone here still thinks you are fantastic. August 28 is a lovely new sobriety date. Check in later and let us know how you’re doing.
️
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Also document how you feel right now. Write it down, take a picture, anything. Use this as strength. My last hangover was a bitch. It lasted a week, I was on the verge of alcohol poisoning again. The pain I felt is fresh in my mind, I can’t ever feel that pain again. Remember this moment, use it to your advantage.
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Hi! Im newly sober and i just relapsed my first time last week. I was feeling the same way as you. I came on here and everyone was so supportive. My main advice I can pass on to you would be to just put it in the past and move on. This is your journey and we all screw up sometimes but if you really want this… You can do it. If concerts are a trigger, dont go to them for awhile. I know they are mine. Hang out with other supportive sober friends. Id stay away from bars for awhile… Go to a movie instead. Keep your mind positive and on track to success 
good luck 
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Hi Mark sorry you had a slip ,i see you went to a gig in march and got through that ok did you go with someone that time, all you can do is get back on that horse , maybe try a meeting dont know if you go to any get a good foundation so when you feel like a drink you can lift the phone wish you well
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Thanks for all the messages guys. Just trying to decide if I should stay off tomorrow as well. On Monday it was public holiday here in the UK
(This weekend is a time of the year when lot of people go out and get drunk) so it always looks like you’ve been partying too hard if you call In sick on the Tuesday. my bosses know I don’t drink but they think it’s just a lifestyle choice and they don’t know the full extent of the problem. So I can’t really be honest with them because I think it would put my job at risk. My workload will be piling up the longer I’m off and I feel guilty putting my colleagues under extra pressure but at the same time It’ll look worse for me if I go back in after one day.
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Taking a Tuesday and Wednesday off after the Bank Holiday I think would look better plus based on how you said you felt earlier it would be better psychologically too. Work is work, it’ll always be there and it’ll get done eventually. Personally I’d go back Thursday, totally refreshed with a plan to stay sober and fucking smash work.
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What did you decide to do man, you taking the day off, how’s the recovery process coming along too, feeling more positive about hitting the sobriety road again?
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I don’t know how the laws work across the pond but here in the US you can’t be discriminated against because of your addiction. That’s not to say people can call off all the time or use it as an excuse to do sub par work, but it’s considered a medical issue and treated as such. For me, it’s also a HUGE part of my accountability. When I get stressed and triggery (usually because of work ironically) I remember how much drinking would ruin my life and mess up my job.
I hope you did take the extra days off. Getting your head together can be the most important part of starting over.
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Hey man thanks for asking. Yeah I rang in this morning, I just haven’t got out of bed yet though, i still feel achy and cloudy but I’m fully intending to return to being sober right away though. I’m just still reeling from what happened, Im gonna get up now and just start keeping myself busy, put some laundry on and clean up etc… I’m thinking I need to do more to stay on track this time though. should I start a diary or something?
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Yeah I thought there might be something similar here but I’ve just read the company handbook and it doesn’t say anything about it. Everything it says just kinda puts the ball on the company’s court such as “we reserve the right to dismiss an employee of we believe their illness will have a negative impact on the business” and stuff like that haha.
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You got this. Got back on the train!!
We all duck up more than we like to think. Life is for living. So live it, and balance it out. Not saying what your did was good. But it will help shape you. Don’t be so hard on yourself. I fuck up nearly every week. But at least I’m not in hospital because I was so depressed form taking taking ice on my comedown. Just work at it every day and you will feel a little bit better. I always think I’m not perfect but I’m trying. Xx
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One of the most helpful things I did was write myself a letter the first sober morning I had. I was still horribly hungover and felt like the biggest waste of life on the planet. I wrote down all the things I hated about myself and my drinking, the hopelessness I felt, etc. I keep that letter in my purse and take it out if I feel a really bad craving. It’s saved me more than once.
I also keep a diary. Always have, and it’s pretty painful to go back and read the drunken ravings of a madwoman. But man, is it lovely to be able to see my life changing for the better day by day.
I’m glad you are staying home today. Yep, grand idea to clean your house. Get your surroundings put back in good order. That always makes me feel more in control. Glad you checked in - been thinking about you.
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Man, start a diary, do visual art, read everything you can, whatever keeps you from going down this road again. There is ZERO shame in anything that keeps you clean.
As far as the work thing goes, they would have one hell of a lawsuit coming if trying to be sober is reason to be fired. But, that means you have to stay sober to keep your job if they knew. Accountability. It’s one if the most powerful tools in my toolbox. Whatever sets me up for success is what I do.
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I just want to say to stay strong. Go back to whatever helped you stay sober for the first 18 months. A slip is a slip. It happens.
Write down how you felt right after you stopped using. How did you feel physically and mentally. How were your emotions? I think a journal may be very beneficial.
I get where others say work is work; but for my family it is our means of paying bills and keeping our kids fed. If I were you I would get my ass back to work, back to routine if that is helpful for you and your sobriety. Good luck and just know you got this!
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Welcome back, remember that you never have to drink or use drugs again, one day at a time. Remember where you made your mistake, not calling your sponsor, not going to a meeting, not getting spiritually fit.
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Don’t worry about work there isn’t anything they can do without proof. From an HR perspective it’s insanely hard to dismiss anyone, just make sure you haven’t posted anything on social media that they can use against you otherwise it’s all groovy trust me. Once you get back into a routine things will be OK again, taking today to catch up in your life and feel more human after a comedown is great. Your serotonin levels will be balancing out again by now, work tomorrow and by Friday you’ll have some sobriety back again! Sweet as a facking nut mate.
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