I have been reading this book on several recommendations. It is heavy on the Higher Power, but a couple of gems I have found so far.
Act “as if” you have corrected your defects. In the process of acting “as if”, the defects will weaken and disappear (the book says God takes them, not sure about that bit). And if that feels phony, then you should remember you are being authentic to your aspirations, even if your self hasn’t quite caught up yet. I like this because it helps make a bridge between the person I am now and the person I want to be.
Don’t give your defects time and energy. When I notice I am spending time and energy on a defect I will cut off the oxygen of time and energy to it so it dies. I like this because it is something practical I can do.
Anyone else who has read it want to jump in with something they learnt?
I may add some more things that I thought were good later.
It is! But the word ‘fake’ somehow made it not sit quite right with me. The extra explanation of being true to your ideals if not your current self, makes me understand it on a new level, somehow.
That’s a great book Flo I learned a lot about my defects of character not just resentment, anger, selfishness, self-centredness and other but I noticed things about the way I lived and even talked were problems that I had to do something about
I’m actually reading the fallow up to the that book at moment called Drop The Rock The Ripple Effect it very go too and it about step 10
I got drop the rock as part of a bundle with that one too. I will take my time and absorb the first one, then try that one too. Glad to hear it will be worth it!
Love this! I used to sort of use this method with losing weight and weight lifting. Eat and lift like you’re already at the place you want to be at. I’ve been using this towards my addiction aswell. Live like I don’t struggle with drugs. It works! But I find the problem I have is in keeping that momentum going. But I especially like the part about not giving your defects oxygen to breathe. Just extinguish it. Will definitly incorporate this thank you for sharing!
I don’t think u do this, but there is a danger that people think acknowledging is enough and then willfully continue to act the same as before. My mother was like that “I am a bitch, but at least I know it” she would say, like that negated her behaviour. Choosing to not give time and energy is an active way to try to reduce the behaviour, not ignoring the defect. I was in particular thinking of my defect of ruminating on past slights. I can acknowledge I do it, but it will keep happening and I will keep acknowledging in an endless loop unless I try to weaken the thinking in some way.
Another good one
‘Defects that are being practised can’t be weakened.’
I guess similar to ‘don’t give defects time and energy’. I can’t wish to be forgiving if I am actively resenting.
thank you for sharing!