Well today is 90 days. I can’t even be happy of my own accomplishment. My parents are a mess, my kids are driving me nuts. The money I had I helped my parents out more than I usually would because they were in a bind. (I reside with them) I don’t know how to stay motivated. I was so proud of myself earlier and didn’t even mind seeing my bank account dwindle as I was saving to get back on my own feet. All I kept thinking was how I could of just went got a bottle or a bunch of bottles and got completely s+$+t faced. I am a wreck and just keep praying to not cave. This is the longest I have been sober and I am struggling. It’s like no one sees how hard I have fought for these small victories. From my hospital stints, to dieing twice last year in acar accident (not alcohol related) to my brother’s death. I just feel like I can’t catch a break. I never wanted a drink so bad in my life right now.
I understand. It feels like you’re holding on for dear life. Like your friend (“friend”) who has been with you for years is being forced out of your life and you have nowhere else to turn.
Who do you have to talk to and learn from? Are you in an AA group? Are you in another alcohol recovery program? Do you have someone who can guide you through this?
I see you. I can totally feel how hard you’ve fought and continue to fight. Keep the power going, celebrate every little bit of freedom from the poison, celebrate it in your own mind by reminding yourself how far you’ve come and how great it is to be free.
Lots of us here know how tall the struggle is cause we’ve done it too. And we totally get it and are in it with you.
Keep it going one day at a time
I hear you @ABCMAK and I am sorry the daily grind is such a struggle 
I don’t believe that all of us will be spared from life’s emotional rollercoaster even after we sober up, have you tried to just sit with and work through them instead of fighting them?
@ABCMAK My heart goes out to you because I know how difficult this journey of sobriety is. I’m so glad I found this app and my AA group. I pray it all works out for you. Congratulations on your 90 days 