About to start step 4 and dreading it …
Can I have some examples of step 4 especially the second part…like why is that a thing?
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Nothing to dread. Can’t give a example, it’s worth doing and you’ll see your part in it. Pray to your higher power for strength to be as fearful and searching as possible. I did mine rather quickly, I wanted to get everything out, who I resented who I had harmed, what I was afraid of. Because I thought it was going to heal me quickly.
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I would suggest asking your sponsor to guide you through it. Its just so different for everyone and extremely personal. I found things I didn’t even know I was holding on to. Was quite self discovering 4 me. Mike is right, you find out what part you played in certain situations. I weight was lifted for me, for sure.
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Yeah absolutely don’t do it by yourself. Your sponsor needs to be there. Mine was so that I wouldn’t relapse, it is a big change for sure. It is pretty emotional but it’s worth it
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Don’t rush this step I did and it fucked me up. List character defects in 4 categories: resentments, fears, harms done and sex conduct. Write down what happened and who was involved and what part of yourself was affected- pride, security, sex relations or whatever.
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By now the only questions you need to be asking are to your higher power and your sponsor. This part of the journey is yours so leave nothing unsaid.
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My sponsor had me do it the way it’s suggested in the book
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I’m also sure there’s some story, somewhere, that someone actually caught fire in the process.
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Step 4 was 6 weeks of brutal emotional roller coaster. I couldn’t wait to move on to my 5th step with my sponser 
. Make sure you have a good grasp of 1-3, youre gonna need it!
Everyone’s 4th step may look different. As some have mentioned the 4 column method is great for inventorying resentments. The other 3 things my sponser had me inventory were all fears including those that kept coming up in the 4th column repeatedly, my sex harms done to myself and others, and things I’m good at. Don’t forget an inventory is everything, not just the bad! A sponser will help you see the stuff that’s hiding, good and bad.
Good luck and God bless.
Speak to your sponsor he or she will put you right ,ive been sponsoring for over 30 years if one my guys had asked on a on line form then i wouldnt be doing my job right , and id kick his ass aswell lol
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I’ve burnt my step 4 
didn’t want that getting in the wrong hands
Sex inventory could’ve made a good film I reckon
I spent a day with my sponsor and ordered in pizza to start the process. I think the pizza did it. 
It is personal to you. When I got to step 10, continue to take an inventory I completely changed it. I have changed it three times as I gained more self-awareness. 
And keep a fire blanket handy - you might need it. 
My sponser told me about a man going through a divorce, and his wife got a hold of his 4th step and used it in court. Keep it safe!
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