Like it’s fine to avoid family if they’re unsupportive and constantly drink in front of you right? I dunno they’re me reason for being sober, telling me I cant handle my alcohol or just drink waaaaay to much, yet drink they drink daily especially if we get together. Theres no talking them into stopping or even stopping around me, so just at the point of almost alienating from family because I’m not sure what to do.
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When I’m asked this question in meetings I ask that person “are you willing to do whatever it takes to be sober?” if it means distancing yourself from your family because they don’t understand or don’t care then that’s a decision you have to make.
Whatever your choice I hope things with out for you and your sobriety!
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It’s fine to distance yourself from anyone who contributes to stress and anxiety in your life. This applies to friends, family, or acquaintances. It applies whether you are in recovery, or just trying to live a peaceful life. It’s your journey. You get to choose who you share it with. Period.
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I completely understand avoiding family members because of their drinking. I have not attended any family gatherings in the five months that I have been sober…holidays / weekend bbqs / birthday parties etc. I feel as though I can handle being around the alcohol but I chose not to. Some of them are the same people that ridiculed my drinking but are just as bad or worse than I was (but that is their battle, not mine). Sometimes I feel bad about avoiding these gatherings but I know that for the first time in a very long time, I am in control of my life and positive things are happening since I have been sober. Focus on your well-being right now…your soberity, health, and happiness is most important. XOXO
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Yeah! Like “we come from a family of drinkers”… my mom told me one day “I didnt understand what an alcoholic was because we drink every day. The alcoholics are the ones that just cant handle drinking every day.” Like… “oh man, he’s drunk and only had two doubles, or a six beers… what a weakling… great grandpa had this much every day and never slurred a word, and grandpa had this much every day and they always acted completely sober” so I’m less of a man for drinking as much (usually more than that) and acting like a drink fool… then I have drink people that I care about spitting beer in my face telling me I’m an alcoholic… they used to gift me alcohol too, or we’d all pool our money and holidays would just be a crazy drunk week… idk… it’s weird, and I hate the way I feel, i hate how i act and the person i become… and that’s another thing… my mom is always telling me “alcohol lowers your inhibitions, so when you’re drunk that’s the true you” it’s really not though. The drunk me lies and plays and does whatever he wants to feel good in that moment. Sober me doesnt want to do cocaine or smoke weed or have sex with strangers… drink me sire as fuck wants to do ALL of those things. I guess in short… I like not drinking I like the way I feel (I feel so much better) and at the same time in miss the way I feel when I’m drunk, because you feel so good at that moment… and that’s why I’m an alcoholic…
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And then through my family and friends… my first go was 70 days sober… just a bet with myself to see of I could… and it’s a constant barrage of “come drink! Come drink! You still sober or what!?” And I was like… its Christmas, we did good you deserve a treat. And got wasted and then it was back to every single day again until after valentines. Then I said let’s be sober… but my friends and family had it in my head that maybe k can be a “normal” and just drink once a week or twice a month… so I chase this idea… and end up drinking twice as much on a night as would when I was drinking every day and making an ass of myself… and getting 10x as blitzed because I not drinking daily. And here I am now… just trying to realize… no. No alcohol. And deal with the texts and calls and voices… just this one day… c’mon let’s have fun
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