So I have some really good days and weeks in sobriety and then I lose momentum and cravings and thoughts kick back in. I have had a rough weekend since I drank on Thursday and made so bad choices. I am lucky nothing happened, it is more just shock and frustration between me and husband. Right now I just don’t know what to do with myself. At this point I have no plan and I am taking it hours and just a day at a time. In the moment I have no desire to drink which is nice but I know that it is only a matter of time. My sister told me yesterday to get my shit together and that nearly put me into tears because deep down I know she is right. I know I have put my loved ones through some rough times. I hate talking about alcohol and sobriety. I tell you, I know myself I’ll get a week or two of good AF time and then I’ll get bored, or frustrated, or I’ll start thinking and reasoning. I am actually seeing someone for this but I hate it the entire time. I hate talking about absence however as I read people’s posts, listen to podcasts, and read the stack of sobriety books that I have bought I do like and I am attracted to a life far away from booze. I just hate this roller coaster, the cycle. I don’t know… so I am back where I started. I am here posting again.
Stay posting here each day, read here each day. When you fully submerse yourself in sobriety you’ll have a shot at making it during the hard times. I wish you well
At some point I just told my self that drinking was not an option… No matter what happened in my life. It was hard after first. I felt like I was depriving myself of something. As the days, weeks, and months began to add up I realized I was living a new and better life
I came here everyday and read and or commented for at least an hour. You need to find yourself a community of like minded individuals to learn and share with. TS happened to be that group for me
I also have an escalation plan. If I ever pick up a drink again what am I going to do to seek out more help? For me I have decided that I would go to AA Meetings.
You got this
Have you tried joining a program? Most people do one program or another. It’s rare to do this alone, no matter how many books you read - I read dozens of books about getting myself together but the change didn’t really start taking root until I worked a program with a group.
There are many, and there are online options for most of them:
Resources for our recovery
Be stronger than the booze, it’ll be hard but it’s a life you deserve.
Well I work all day for day 3. So for today I was thinking on making work my first priority, exercise my second priority, and then nutrition and meal prep my third priority. Just trying to do a lot of self care.