Today is day one of me taking the step to be sober from the substance I was doing. I’m having a panic attack crying and I don’t feel like myself and I hate it. I had plans today to spend with family but I can’t function like this. I’m by myself and I’m trying to sober up. I just ate something I’ve been drinking water. I’ve prayed to God many times. I feel so ashamed of myself , I should have known better. Can anyone talk to me please. I feel so scared and alone. I was raised better than this I feel like such a failure. I need help but I’m too ashamed to reach out to anyone.
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Hi Red, welcome to TS 
.
What is the substance you’re coming off of? Alcohol and benzos can pose great health risks, even death during withdrawal.
You don’t need to feel ashamed here, we’ve all been in a similar spot before. You’re not alone.
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Welcome Red. This is a good safe place to be when you are trying to get sober.
One of the first attitudes and feelings to change for me was that shame. I got sober under court supervision and the department of corrections. My shame came from comparing myself to others, largely. So being the successful one in that environment allowed me to get the help I needed without activating that shame. Not that that’s gonna work for you, though. That’s just my experience.
I can tell you that everything is gonna be alright 
. Blessings on your house as you begin your journey.
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You got this !! Stay strong!! Better times are coming I am bout to be 2 months and yesterday my daughter told me she was so proud of me that really made it all worth it!!!
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I’m sure that had to be amazing to hear! Congrats I am so proud of you!
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Hey, first of all be proud of yourself for just thinking of taking a step in the right direction, even I it is just a mindset. It means your tired of being tired lol. I recently got out of rehab because I felt the same way. This is your journey so I won’t tell you what to do. But my advice is to take it one day at a time, slowly and do not try and rush yourself! Trust me tried doing that last time and did not get very far. I’d start with meetings or online podcasts if your comfortable with that, try talking to people just like you did on here (Great Job Already) once you continue doing that it gets easier, it did for me!
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Welcome Red.
I think we’ve all been exactly where you are and know how it feels. You’re gonna be alright, you’re not alone! Everything you’re feeling and experiencing is completely normal and it will pass in time. In the meantime, take care of your self and let your body and mind heal; don’t take on more than you can handle.
Congrats on day 1; of all the days of sobriety, day 1 is the most important, the most profound.
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Welcome to the forum 
I feel your pain my advice is to spend as much time as you can reading around the different threads maybe try a meeting either online or in person and don’t let yourself get tired or hungry that can be a trigger and if you need any more advice just ask
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Meetings made it easier for me and helped me on my sober journey prob before you were born wish you well
“I don’t feel like myself”. Very true statement. Even a little bit of sober time can begin to de-couple your real self from your false identity you’ve been used to for so long. Aka. Ego run wild.
For now, think and speak gently to yourself. Take it easy on yourself. Learn to get real comfortable with being uncomfortable. ODAAT (one day at a time). Just stay sober for today.
Check out a group as well. You got this!
Welcome Red! Glad you found us. 
Those first few days were hell for me. All I managed to do was get myself to the outpatient detox center every morning and back home in the evening, crying there and back That was a huge feat in itself. I couldnt even muster up the energy to shower until day 3.
The good news is… you never have to experience day one again. Hang in there. It gets easier.
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I’m glad you’re here. I found a lot of support in this group and I hope you do to. Don’t feel ashamed. I felt deep shame for my alcohol addiction and it is one of the things that kept me in the grasp of addiction. Once I decided to be open, honest and let go of my shame I felt a great freedom which I believe has made me stronger in my sobriety. Do you have any family or good friend there who will be supportive and encouraging in your decision to be sober? I hope you keep coming here it is a good group of people who are encouraging and can give a lot of helpful positive advice. Also you should be proud of your course to decide to become sober. That’s something to be proud of!