I got my first DUI 2 nights ago. I blew a .17. I could’ve killed someone if I didn’t hit a car before making it out of the parking lot. I was planning on driving an hour home. I don’t remember any of it. I started taking shots and just couldn’t stop. I just graduated college with my medical license last year. It sounds like I’ll get to keep it if I stick to sobriety. They told me I’m a binge drinking problem and I never even heard of that. I just got out of a long term relationships a couple weeks ago and of course it was with a cop. To say I feel embarrassed alone scared and confused would be an understatement. I am not suicidal, but the thought has crossed my mind that I wish I had just died in the accident last night. Does it ever get better?
Hello!
Yes!
It 
gets better.
Circumstances don’t necessarily change, and life still has its ups and downs.
What gets better is how we respond to our daily lives.
That takes time.
There are so many knowledgeable people on here. Listen to them!
And congratulations on your degree! How exciting.
Having full control over your actions, decisions and words is a HUGE plus of sobriety. It gets much, much better. You have a wonderful opportunity at a fantastic life that you’ve worked hard for.
Try to frame it like this. You are not being deprived of alcohol but alcohol is trying to deprive you of your life. Best wishes and welcome to TS.
Welcome to Talking Sober, friend.
Sudden, severe, and often ugly consequences have propelled lots of people into sobriety, so you are in good company.
In sobriety, life doesn’t magically get better, but our ability to deal with the hand we are dealt does improve, and dramatically. Add to that the idea that we stop tearing around breaking things, and it’s easy to conclude, correctly, that it does get better, and pretty quickly.
The key for just about everyone I know who has gotten sober is that we need to take steps specifically to grow our sobriety. Yes, we stay abstinent, sometimes with medical help, sometimes by gritting our teeth and just enduring, sometimes by denying ourselves opportunities like big parties or whirlwind relationships. But on its own, abstinence is a necessary but not sufficient condition for sobriety.
My thinking is well described by the AA definition of a spiritual experience or spiritual awakening as “the personality change sufficient to bring about recovery from alcoholism has manifested itself among us in many different forms.” In other words, work is needed to change our personalities, which means how we react emotionally, the attitudes we have about alcohol and our relationship to other people, and the actions we undertake - what we read, what we practice, what we say.
If you can find yourself a program of recovery, you will be well on your way. That might be a rehabilitation program, or AA or Smart Recovery or Dharma Recovery, or even intensive and frequent interaction on Talking Sober. There are many roads to recovery, and no single one has a lock on the truth or on what will work for a given individual.
I can tell you this - everything is gonna be alright. Things might turn out different than you want or think, but with sobriety and right thinking, we can appreciate the good, the best, in the outcomes.
I got my first DUI. I am waiting on a court date. But I can’t believe I made it to this point. I always said “it’s not like I’m an alcoholic bc I stop drinking for work” bc I love my job and it is my priority….but I do binge drink. If I take a shot I can’t stop. The feeling of freedom from anxiety and depression is such a relief. Then I black out. I become invincible. But I feel like people only like me because I’m fun. If I stop drinking who will I have?
The only ones worth having are the ones still there after the dust settles. I had a blackout this weekend. It did not feel like freedom at all. I don’t remember a single thing, have second degree burns on my hand, and my husband got hurt trying to pick me up off the floor. I’ve decided I don’t like that kind of “freedom.” And it always leads back to pain of some sort when it’s over.
Just try to be sober. Even if you fail, try. And then when and if you fail, try again.
I am a licensed medical provider. It is my first DUI and probation. Of If I complete probation and AA it will not affect my licensure or renewal. But I work with kids and am worried my office will find out and fire me? I want to be up front and honest to take the weight off of my shoulders but my lawyer said I probably shouldn’t disclose if I’m not required. I just don’t want to come to work every day wondering if it will be my last shift.
Please if anyone has any form of reassurance I could really use it right now. Or is it very likely this is it for me?
1.) listen to your lawyer
2.) sleep in the bed you make
3.) a guilty conscience needs no accuser.
These are the consequences of our actions. We must press through them humbly like a refining fire. This sucks, but it’ll eventually pass. So, take a deep breath and listen to your lawyer.
Typically your professional license will come with an obligation to report (depending on the licensing body). They will most likely find out anyway so it’s up to you. A word of caution, the cover up is often worse than the crime. There’s not much that you can do other than the next right thing. I would suggest an outpatient rehab, daily AA, and a drug/alcohol evaluation. Follow suggestions and remain humble. The second you get defensive or argumentative people will immediately lose sympathy.
My gut feeling is it won’t cost you your job.
Listen to your lawyer.
I’m sure you’re in panic mode. It happened. You’re lucky it didn’t turn out as bad as it could have.
You’ll get through it.
Hi. I am from MD. I just got my first DUI. I am so scared. All I want know is to fix things so I can do better and be better. On top of the DUI charge I got an impaired by a controlled dangerous substance charge bc I had a weed pen on me. But there was no blood test, no eval besides the breathalyzer, is it likely this charge will get dropped?
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Pterodactyl, why are you starting a new thread? The answers and reassurance you got on your first thread (Linked here), on this very same topic, are unlikely to change with a new thread.
It’s very frightening to be confronted with our loss of control. I know from experience, multiple DUI’s, job and relationship losses are my credentials. What will help you more than seeking advice is to listen to that advice and to follow it.
@pterodactyl , you can find some responses to your posts here. We have merged your posts together.
I do know it can be confusing learning how the forum works. Look to the icon in the right corner which shows notifications and select from there. We are here to help.
What/who would you be if you stop drinking? You’ll have/be the happier, healthy you that can be free of the misery wheel! That’s who.
DUIs are costly. Keep binging, or even turn to daily drinking, and the cost will be much steeper. Millions before you can attest.
You’ll likely have to complete a drug/alcohol evaluation by a substance use professional. I recommend you be 100% open & honest. Do the outpatient intensive treatment program that the court will likely assign and live life differently through some program of recovery. There are many out there and they can be life changing. But we gotta be willing, and, have a desire to do it & put the work in.
Sorry about the leagal stuff you’re going through. Unfortunately, it’s a very common theme in the land of drugs & alcohol.
I know this post is a few months old, but I really hope things settled down with your medical license. That first couple of weeks after a DUI is pure panic, especially when you have a career on the line.
I went through a similar mess recently and the anxiety was brutal. What actually helped me calm down was getting a clear, no-BS look at the legal side. I talked to McCabe Law and they basically broke down the realistic options for trial vs plea deals without the usual lawyer fluff.
Having a solid defense attorney who understands how to protect your professional future makes a massive difference. Just wanted to share in case anyone else stumbles on this while searching for answers.