Not quite as dramatic as the title would suggest, but ive had a text from a drug friend and dont know what im going to do.
So I lost most of my friends through my addiction, I have one honest to god true friend, she’s never been an addict but she was married to one, she was my friend before and during my addictions and was there through numerous relapses. She never got tired of building me up when I was clean or telling me I was worth more in my darkest days. Even when I lost my home and children, it was her shoulder I cried on. Never once did she judge me.
But then there’s the others, just bin sent a txt saying “just scored, on way to yours, I’ll sort ya out” and I know I need to say no. But my demons are shouting “FUCK YEAH”
I don’t want to say goodbye to all but one friend (even though she’s a diamond) but will every day be a reset day if I don’t??
Please say no to people who are encouraging you, they are not helping you at all, You are doing all the right things (posting here), You will find a better circle of friends, that you can trust when you are a little stronger
If your hair stylist calls you asking where you are she probably wants to do your hair. If a drug friend calls you they probably want to do drugs.
Just getting the thoughts out of my head, and being to see what ive written is helping, and I’ve been looking through posts here…seeing everyone happy and healthy is giving me hope.
It’s just so hard saying goodbye to people. Most of them I don’t care if I ever see them again, but in from a small town so some of my drug friends were my friends growing up. I think thats why in struggling to cut ties.
Thankyou for replying, I really needed someone to back up what I know already.
If my hair stylist calls then im hiding. My split ends are living the high life in lockdown xx
Just know that you have support and friendship available to you outside of people who you do drugs with. Many of us have sadly had to pause or sever connections that were important to us in order to get healthy, it’s really hard, I’m still having to set boundaries with friends who drink and do drugs. But it’s the right thing. Sending you strength <3
Always do whats best for yourself. Long term goals. If most of your friends are addicts and dont support your sobriety. then they are not your friend. if your friend is a addict that supports your sobriety and doesn’t encourage then they are your friend. just remember dont put yourself in a situation that will temp you. if you have to cut ties with everyone but your Diamond in your life then so be it. it wont be easy but delete everyone off FB Snap chat Instagram. block them all everyone so you cant reach out to them if you are feeling that urge to relapse. Set yourself up for success. the people that stick around and support you are your friends through the good bad and ugly! stick with it you got it!
I’m only asking but would you have any other common ground with the enabling friends without drugs or alcohol?
Mostly no- but the friend from today, and one or two others, were long term friends before drugs. They’re the ones that im struggling to want to sever ties with. Because we had a friendship before based on the fact that we truly get along and have stuff in common.
Most of the people I did drugs with I don’t care if I ever see again! They’re already long gone from my contact list lol.
It is better to have a single true friend, than a lot of “regular” friends who unconsciously try to kill you. And think of your true friend, how much weight will she carry if you relapse again because of bad friends. How disappointed she’ll be. She must be one fucking good friend. She may have stayed long, but if you keep relapsing, she might leave you eventually. This is my opinion, do with it as you wish. Good luck
Then maybe they could be a little more supportive and respect your wishes
Don’t answer that text and stay away from anyone who will jeopardize your sobriety. No one who cares about you would encourage you to go back to that dark time in your life. Stay in the sunshine and live the life you were meant to have. Not a life where you are a slave to drugs and alcohol, because that is a very short life.
Fuck yeah just being honest. You gonna end up resetting until you like 100 years old lol. Keep on playing with your emotions, you gonna reset that too. Do you really want to take one step forward and take two back. Did you really make progress like that because if you did you need to show me the secret. Try it right now take one step forward and than two steps back, tell me if your moving in the right direction?
Anyone can be both. That’s why working on myself is so important, because at the end of the day the only person who can truly build me up or tear me down is… me. I can filter everyone else, which I fail at sometimes, ultimately it’s my fault, not there’s.
And some people, whether I realize it or not, want to bring me down to their level. Misery loves company, active addiction love relapse. Boundaries, I’ll be a dick if it means protecting what God has given me.