Well, I reset the c*ke timer. Almost 9 yrs. Not a bender, not sure what it was. I had a couple drinks at a concert and was offered a line, I did it…then a week later another couple drinks and just thought fuck it. It was offered and I did it. I feel emotionally shitty. I dont have a desire to do anything again. Im not actively relapsing or anything, it took a while to accept what happened at face value, and I just wanted to admit it to others. I guess I need to start considering where I go and who I surround myself with again… so yea, I guess I got to comfortable. Thanks for reading.
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Wow, almost 9 years? That sucks. It sounds like you maybe still think there is something ‘fun’ about alcohol or drugs? Idk, I just know for me I had to really internalize that it had long since stopped offering anything but pain to my life. I hope you can recommit to sobriety and maybe find some additional support or therapy. That is rough. 
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Really glad you’re still here, figuring it out.
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Yea, it was a “when in Rome” moment… it was weird. Out of character kinda, and it wasnt fun haha. I typically dont drink, maybe 3 times a year and I think I just have to recommit like you said. The booze def lowered my threshold to abstain from stuff around me. And I can say that for sure now.
So Im 5 days in hahaha no booze no blow. And im looking forward to 10+ yrs
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It would have been 9 yrs in September
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The alcohol would definitely alter decision making for me as well. And it also depends on who you are hanging out with and if they ‘get it’ or not. It is easier with friends who understand and don’t pressure and especially friends who don’t use. Glad you are recommitted. New day, new opportunity. 
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Thats an amazing length of time to be sober for. Also to pick yourself back up and carry on takes real bravery. Good for you!
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Thank you i appreciate that 
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I don’t have the recovery time to even begin understanding how crappy that must feel…
But, I know you’re not alone. An ally of mine went ten years before relapsing with his drug of choice. He said it sucked so bad…
But, that has now been many years ago.
So, one thing I do know is, this doesn’t defeat you, which you already know too. So, yeah man, literally just keep doing what you have been doing to succeed, and you absolutely got this!
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Wow, nine years is a seriously lone time, first thing that came to mind was that saying “every cloud has a silver lining” and thought to myself where is the positive here, and it could just be spur of the moment events that remind you of a place you don’t want to be, hope all continues to go well 
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I’ve been where you are more than once and I understand this feeling, don’t let this relapse deter you from well deserved health and sobriety though! If you can stay sober for 9 years you know you have the momentum within you to keep going, stay on the course and stay in this community! Sending you so much support my friend 
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I feel you I was clean 19 months and people places and things got me instantly before I knew what was happening I was back in my madness, be greatful to be back because people like more than ever don’t. Restart fo us and don’t beat yourself up it.i happens
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Thanks for sharing. It helps to remind me that the slippery slope is always one sip away.
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Thank you for coming right back to us and to sobriety. You’re showing the strength of your recovery by doing that. I admire your resilience to have made it 9 years. You didn’t lose that accomplishment just because of resetting your timer. Still, I’m sorry for all of the feelings that come with a lapse. Hang in there. Stay with us.
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Thank you all for the support. If this has shown me anything good, its that the mind will play tricks no matter how much time has passed. I have to stand on my convictions in regards to alcohol and drugs. So much time went by I thought, maybe I was over reacting, not that bad, ect. Anyway I was wrong.
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Been there done that one. At least you realized where you are/were at. Good for you!! Keep on keeping on!!
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