I’m 36 I have suffered from PIED for over 15 years, and I am on an intentional healing sobriety journey. I have gone multiple stints of 30 days sober and have not regained any ability to confidently and consistently get or maintain a legit erection also my sex drive is almost non existant. My blood work is good. Does this ever come back? Will I ever feel like a man again?
Yes,
But I stopped looking at my porn use along with my PIED, and lust as not the real problems, But rather symptoms of deeper rooted problems that were subconsciously working against me.
I didn’t stand a chance of quitting porn until I started exposing and addressing such problems. God played a big role in revealing them to me.
One such problem of mine that many share is the problem of connection. I define connection as trusted men in my life that know me and are looking out for my personal and spiritual growth. I have about 20 of such friends from a couple support groups that I’m part of.
I’m saying this to help offer direction. What about you? Do you have adequate connection in you life? Are you part of a support group such as SAA, SA, or SLAA? If not, I would say that your lack of connection in your life is a far greater problem than your PIED, or your relapsing into porn. Ignoring such deeper rooted problems will put one at a serious disadvantage. What thoughts do you have with what I’m sharing?
It came back in a few months for me when I was with the right person. Every other person I was with prior, I had the thoughts “This is all a lie, I don’t actually feel this way and I don’t even really like her” despite the initial drive being impossible to resist.
So try not to confuse PIED with what might really be a lie you’re telling yourself which could be: you think you like a girl but really she’s just triggering the porn seeking instinct and when you somehow magically get down to it, it’s not really porn, even if she’s gorgeous, and the whole system breaks down. Porn is way more private and secure, real sex is actually kind of high stakes in the beginning until you develop trust and love. Now that I’m married though I can make mistakes left and right and it’s just funny or mildly embarrassing but she’ll always trust and love me so it’s fine.